


Love in Red

by Slackersunite



Series: Love in Color [1]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types, spideypool - Fandom
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Break Up, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Coming Out, Death, Explicit Language, Fluff, Heavy Angst, Heavy Drinking, Homophobia, Humor, Kissing, M/M, Partying, Physical Abuse, Self-Hatred, Sexual Humor, Sexuality, Slow Build, Smut, Suicide, Temporary Character Death, Verbal Abuse, Violence, timelines are fucked, trippy dimensional shit, unicorn boxers, voice boxes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-27
Updated: 2016-12-03
Packaged: 2018-07-18 16:33:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 53,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7322689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slackersunite/pseuds/Slackersunite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a chance encounter Spiderman and Deadpool can't help but to fall hopelessly in love. But when Wade's line of work threatens his baby boy the question becomes how far are they willing to go to protect their new found relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Nice Ass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deadpool blows something up, and Spiderman's there to web him to the floor.

Spiderman was on patrol. He'd been swinging around the city for hours and nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Just as he sat down to rest on a roof ledge he heard it. Looking in the direction of the noise he saw the explosion. Quickly getting to his feet he swung towards the chaos. When he got there he saw where there used to be an old warehouse was now an open field full of rubble. Before Spiderman landed he saw all the men with guns and the bags of cocaine that were spared the explosion. In the middle of it all was a man clad in red outfit shooting and taunting and just straight up talking shit. 

"BAM! There goes another head!" the man in the red said. Turning around and pointing his gun at another perp, "How many was that? Come on baby count!" He yelled and shot a bullet straight through the guys head. Counting his fingers he said, "I think that's about twelve," and started violently laughing as he shot some more approaching men. 

Spiderman dropped down in front of him and webbed his gun. The man in red looked up in mock surprise, "AH SPIDER!" The man in red dropped his now webbed gun and unscheathed his katanas. "I was never much of a nature enthusiast." And sliced towards Spiderman who quickly dodged the blades. Spiderman shot some more webs at the man but he expertly dodged them all. In the middle of it all the man stopped to wave a finger at Spiderman, "BAD SPIDER! Shooting webs is rude!" Spiderman was not in the mood for this. He had a report to finish for his stupid economics class, he had to get some pictures to Mr. Jameson, and he needed to get groceries for Aunt May. Spiderman shot the man with his largest web, and the man was stuck to the floor completely covered in the strong webs. 

The guy started laughing, "You should really take up web design." 

"You're really insane aren't you?" Spiderman said, webbing the rest of the men that were shooting at him. At that comment the man started laughing harder. 

"Not insane. IN SANE! Get it! HA!"

"You're in Queens buddy," Spiderman replied as he contacted SHIELD. 

"Aw you think I'm your buddy?! How sweet!" the man continued to sputter out meaningless sentences. 

Spiderman turned around to leave, he really needed to cross out some stuff from his to-do list. 

"WOAH! NICE ASS!!" the man yelled as Spiderman was swinging away, "I'm Deadpool by the way! CALL ME BABE!" 

Spiderman shook his head, he always fought the weird ones. 

As soon as Spiderman was out of sight, Deadpool used one of his many knives to cut out of the webbing. Then he quickly ran away kicking the other men as he went along. 

First Deadpool went to his apartment to take a shower, then he went to Samantha's Tacos because he didn't feel like cooking. Plus all he could think about was that sweet ass. He hit a bar that was close by and he started telling anyone drunk enough to listen about how Spiderman had totally beat his ass, but that it really couldn't compare to the man's ass itself. 

"I mean really! THE GUY'S GOT AN ASS!" 

Deadpool swore he would stalk Spiderman later, but for now he just downed a few (35) beers and went to his apartment for some well needed shut eye. 

~

Peter had successfully delivered the groceries to Aunt May and was now in his bedroom working diligently on his econ report. But he kept on thinking about "Deadpool", the guy was kinda funny you had to admit. Peter thought the best thing to do was google the guy. He found some pretty gross pictures of the guy shooting people's brains out on various occasions and a wikipedia page about the "Merc with a Mouth". Surprisingly not the weirdest villain he had come across, surely The Goblin was at the top of that list. However Deadpool was the most interesting, at least he had a sense of humour, and Peter thought, "He thinks I have a nice ass." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next one will have a lot more interaction, I promise.


	2. Hug a Bullet Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deadpool effectively stalks the Spider... and the Spider wouldn't have it any other way.

The next day after Peter had handed in his report and a package of Spiderman pictures to the Daily Bugle he stripped off his civilian clothes to reveal the Spiderman costume underneath. He was sitting on top of a tall apartment building, he was really tired he didn't feel like swinging around he just wanted to sit and watch. Hopefully the city's villains would give him a break today.

 

~

 

Wade was beginning to form a healthy obsession with Spiders. He saw one in the shower and instead of putting it outside like he usually would he just let it stay there, "Hey buddy. Remember to stay clean."

  
After a healthy breakfast of tacos Wade put on his Deadpool costume and took to the city streets. He visited all his favorite homeless people and then he climbed onto a roof and started to scan for the spider with the ass. He was humming Careless Whispers as he jumped from one roof to the next. A few roofs and sick flips later he saw a certain spider sitting on a ledge. He dropped down onto his hands and knees and started slowly crawling towards Spiderman humming Hungry Like the Wolf the whole time.

Spiderman was looking out at the city, no matter how many times you saw the same skyline you never got tired of it. He always liked to imagine what the little people on the streets were doing. Where were they going? Why was everyone always in a rush? He didn't notice Deadpool behind. The Merc came up behind him his mouth next to Spiderman's ear and yelled, "HIYA!"

  
Spiderman jumped off the ledge in surprise. He quickly stuck to the side of the building and jumped back up kicking Deadpool in the chest with both feet. Deadpool stumbled back and raised his hands.

  
"Woah woah. You're really hostile for an arachnid."

  
Spiderman was completely beyond himself, why the hell was Deadpool trying to make casual conversation.  
"What the hell?!"

  
Deadpool sat down criss-cross applesauce and gently patted the cement in front of him.

  
"See Spidey the thing is we have really similar suits and the copyright office isn't too happy."

  
Spiderman didn't sit down, he crossed his arms and said, "Well I had it first, so you can fix yours."

 

Deadpool gasped, "Oh no! I really like my suit."

  
Spiderman laughed, this guy wasn't so bad, "Well my suit makes my ass look nice."

  
Deadpool stopped talking for awhile then. The voiceboxes were yelling wild innuendos and they wouldn't shut up.

  
"CAN YOU GUYS JUST BE QUIET! I'M TRYING TO HAVE A CONVERSATION!"

  
Spiderman looked utterly confused even with the mask on. He was about to say something when yet another sound interrupted him. Deadpool heard the noise too and the two men simultaneously looked toward the explosion.

  
"You gotta be shitting me," Spiderman said as he jumped off the building and started to swing towards the mess.

  
"WAIT UP!" Deadpool yelled as he followed the swinging man on foot.

 

  
~

 

  
When Deadpool got to the burning building Spiderman was already webbing people to the walls. He really had the situation under control.

  
The voice boxes were chattering about amateur arsonists who didn't know how to level a building, and Deadpool was just watching Spiderman work,"Damn that ass."

  
Thats when Deadpool saw the guy with the huge machine gun coming out of the mess. Spiderman hadn't noticed him and ah bullets. Deadpool quickly stepped between the gun and Spiderman taking a few (9) bullets through his chest. He shot the guy in the head, and had time to appreciate how nice the machine gun was before he landed on the floor and bled out.

  
It all happened so fast and Spiderman was at a complete loss. Did Deadpool just save his life? Spiderman quickly webbed the rest of the men, he was really not in the mood now and rushed towards Deadpools corpse.

  
"Yo! DP, what the hell man."

  
Spiderman knelt next to the mercenary kind of in shock. He pryed part of the man's mask up to check a pulse. He saw how Deadpool's skin was all scar tissue. There was no pulse. Spiderman didn't call SHIELD yet, he wouldn't. After what felt like hours but was really only minutes the former corpse coughed back to life.

  
As he woke up Deadpool saw Spiderman eagerly looking at him.

  
"Oh hi Webs," he said weakly.

  
"'Oh hi?' What do you mean, 'OH HI' YOU JUST DIED!"

  
"Did I? Huh, okay well now im un-unalived," Deadpool started to get up, and he found Spiderman's hand on his back supporting him, helping him get up. This was definitely new.

  
"You okay?" Spiderman was still holding onto him.

  
"Yeah- Yeah, I'm good Spidey. I'll cya around," Deadpool was stunned by how nice this guy was.

  
Spiderman let go of Deadpool so he could leave, he sounded pretty uncomfortable, but before he was too far away Spiderman yelled back, "Hey DP, maybe we could hang tomorrow? While I'm on patrol. I could totally use an extra hand."

 

Deadpool ran back to Spiderman, "OMG REALLY?!"

  
Spiderman didn't have time to reply before the Merc was giving him a colossal hug that threatened to break his ribs.

  
"I'LL BE THERE SPIDEY DON'T YOU WORRY," the Merc said before he carefully put Spiderman back down and merilly skipped away singing "I'm a boss ass bitch".

  
Spiderman shook his head, this guy was crazy. He called SHIELD, and then he swung home. Deadpool wasn't so bad at all, he was really nice. He saved his life, like who does that?

  
"Deadpool just died for me," he thought.

 

~

 

Once at home Wade was in one of his greatest moods. Even the voice boxes were agreeing with him.  
"Wow we just, we just totally hugged Spiderman omg... WOW! THIS IS GREAT! We're going to see him tomorrow. HE LIKES US! WOW!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will have angst.


	3. Jello Heartbreaks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Groceries just got a little more dramatic.  
> {Angst, Fluff}

Wade rolled out of bed the next day, the voiceboxes and his skin and his "fucking brain" had kept him up all night. He dragged himself to the kitchen and opened the fridge.

"Fuck! Shit, hell goddammit fuckk," he yelled as he kicked the fridge door closed again. It was empty, not even a beer left. So Wade pulled on a baseball cap and dark red hoodie and walked out of his apartment to the closest grocery store. He was having a very nice conversation with the voiceboxes on how the sidewalk had sparkly bits in it when he got to the store. He quickly grabbed a cart and stepped onto the ledge and started pushing himself through the aisles easily grabbing all the things he wanted (sour cream, flour, avocadoes, tomatoes, ground beef, beer, etc.) 

~

When Peter woke up in the morning he had a throbbing headache. He was supposed to go see Harry today, and he really just wanted to ignore the whole situation. As much as he had liked Harry it just wasn't the same anymore. They had been dating for a few months and the guy was so overwhelming. Just thinking about him gave Peter anxiety, but he didn't have the guts or the words to break it off. 

Peter got up and got dressed, he ran cold water through his hair and started to the kitchen when the door bell rang. 

"Fuck," Peter mumbled as he went to open the door. He already knew it was Harry, of course it was Harry, who the fuck else would it be. 

"Hey baby," Harry purred as he came in wrapping his arms around Peter and kissing him. It was only eight in the morning and this guy was already fucking around was what was going through Peter's head the whole time. 

"Hey- I need to go grocery shopping so like yeah bye." 

"Baby! I just got here, I'll come with you," the smile on his face was absolutely disgusting in Peter's mind. 

~

So Peter ended up in the grocery store with Harry Osborne tailing him and making almost everything sexual. Peter ran by the aisle to grab three whole jumbo sized bottles of advil because he knew he'd need it.

Peter was trying to reach something on the top shelf when Harry suddenly said, "Peter! Are you feeling alright?" 

Peter looked at him, what kind of random question, "Yeah..."

Harry's eyes became big and he came closer to Peter who used all his will not to move away, "I gotta tell you something Peter..."

"And...?"

"Well, I just don't think our relationship is working. So I think we should take a break..." Harry was waiting patiently for Peter's reply.

Peter's heart was beating rapidly, he was sure he would have an anxiety attack in the middle of the store.

"Um... okay," was all Peter could get out. He went to grab his cart and walk away but Harry grabbed his arm.

"Peter, you have to understand. If we take a break then maybe we can get back to where we were before. Ya know?"

Peter just mumbled out another, "okay" before he walked away. He was in shock. The look on Harry's face had completely broken him. Harry looked completely heart-broken and that hurt Peter like hell. They had been friends for so long and Peter had always had a crush on Harry until one day Harry liked him back. But Harry was manipulative and sometimes cruel, he made Peter feel like hell a lot of the time but Peter had loved Harry. It was weird, it was Peter's own fault at least that's what he thought. He undeniably loved something that wasn't good for him, and Harry was smart, manipulative, even if he didn't realize it. 

Peter's emotions ran through happiness at finally being free, and sadness at losing something he cared about. He sure as hell didn't want to get back together with Harry though. But there was Peter in the middle of aisle 10 and not knowing what to do just broke down crying on the floor. His heart was beating so fast and he felt like he was going to pass out. This. This was the fucking effect Harry had on him. 

~

Wade was still rollling through the aisles, humming an original Wade Wilson. When he got to aisle 10 though, he saw a man sobbing on the floor. His brown hair was stuck up in all directions like someone had attempted to pull it out. The man's face was completely red and soaked in tears, and he was visibly at war with himself. Part of Wade wanted to back up slowly and just get the jello packets some other time. The voice boxes however insisted on getting jello now. So Wade slowly approached the crying man. 

"Um... are you alright?"

The man looked up in shock, he quickly wiped his face on his sleeves and started to get up. Wade held him to steady the man being careful not to reveal his scarred face. 

"I- I'm... fine," the man sniffled. Wade offered him a tissue box from his cart. But the man waved it off. 

"You sure? Cause you don't look good."

The man laughed a cold dead laugh, "Yeah- I'll be fine. Just self-pity is all."

Wade reached up and grabbed the green jello packet and threw it into his cart.

"Okay! Have a good one bro," he said as he turned his cart around, "Oh and BEE TEE DUBS... sometimes a little self-pity is good for you." 

At that the man in the sweatshirt was gone, but Peter was smiling in wonderful surprise. He recognized the demeanor, the voice, the vernacular of the man. That was almost definitely Deadpool, no other grown man would say btw in all caps. Peter smiled to himself, he felt a lot better. Deadpool was adorably sweet even when he wasn't being a mercenary. 

~

That night Peter put on his suit and went to the roof that he woud meet Deadpool on. When he got there the mercenary was already waiting for him. 

"HIYA SPIDEY!" He waved childishly.

Spiderman chuckled and sat down next to the Merc. 

"How are you this fine night muscles?" 

"Oh just peachy webs. Super fruity," Wade replied all the while thinking about how Spiderman had just called him 'muscles'.

Spiderman laughed, "Well now we just gotta wait until something happens."

The Merc leaned back on his hands, "Okay. But how is the web-head this finely polluted night?" 

Spiderman was quiet at that. Peter wanted to badly rant about everything that happened, but he didn't want to whine. Just as he was about to tell Deadpool that he was just fine his phone buzzed through the spandex suit. Peter quickly took it out and saw the text from Harry, it said "Hi." 

Peter moaned loudly and violently threw the phone off the building using all his super strength. Then remembering that he was an almost broke college student he quickly webbed it back to himself.

"Woah... Spidey? What's aching?" Deadpool asked some of the wit gone from his voice, replaced with concern.

Spiderman threw himself back, laying on the roof, "A crappy break-up... honestly a crappy relationship to start with." 

Deadpool layed down next to Spiderman, "Tell Dr. Pool everything Spidey," his voice was full of concern.

So Peter told Deadpool everything about Harry and how manipulative he was and everything. The whole time Deadpool just nodded his head and spit out the usual, "Ugh" and "Ew" at something particularly awful about Harry. 

At the end of his rant, Peter started absolutely bawling. He moved to pull of his mask, "I'm Peter by the way," Spiderman said as he pulled off the mask. He might as well he had already confessed half his emotions to the man. Deadpool's eyes went wide behind the mask as Peter revealed his soft brown hair and perfect skin, that was tear streaked and red at the moment. 

"You saw me at the grocery store today," Peter smiled a little wiping the tears from his eyes. 

Deadpool was hit with realization, and now he was glad that he had gotten jello. 

"I'm Wade," he said, "I would take off my mask but it's not a really pretty sight." 

Peter sniffled, "I'm sure that's not true, but it's okay. You don't have to." 

Both men sat back up, they had become closer than ever in the past hour. Somehow Wade just made Peter feel comfortable, Wade was safe. Isn't that what every superhero wants at the end of the day? Something safe. Peter leaned against Wade resting his head on his shoulder and looking out at the city. Wade internally screaming his joy at this positive contact wrapped his hand around Peter. They both looked out at the city but while Peter was re-running all his moments with Harry and cringing at the memories, Wade was celebrating his new found friendship with this man that had felt comfortable enought to vent to him. 

"Hey Petey... you should totally come over to my place for some jello tomorrow. Don't worry it's the green kind. Like HULK!" 

"SMASH!" Peter yelled instinctively. Wade almost started crying in joy, he had really found someone really perfect hadn't he? Even the voice boxes were impressed.

Peter continued though, "I'd love to have jello." 

Wade hugged Peter closer, "If you give me your number, I'll text you the address," said the Merc coyly.

Peter smiled. They exchanged numbers and sat like that a little while more. 

~

Peter got home and smiled, maybe this day wasn't completely the worst. He went to bed after a cold shower the bottles of advil completely unopened on his desk. He fell asleep thinking about what a great guy Wade was, even if he had a tendency to shoot people's brains out.

~

Wade got home and cheered loudly. "WHO'S THE BOSS ASS BITCH?" 

"I'M THE BOSS ASS BITCH!"

"...even though Petey-pie's the one with the assss." 

"Eh, my ass is pretty nice too." 

Then Wade realized how messy his apartment was, with the stained carpet and greasy walls and the beer bottle and paper plates everywhere. 

"Well... fuck shit." 

Wade threw his arms up in defeat. 

He would spend the whole night cleaning, he finished around three in the morning. And then he made the jello and put in the fridge so it would be nice and hardened when Peter came over. 

The sun was already up when Wade finally got to bed, but he fell asleep thinking about Peter a welcome distraction from the usual depressing stuff.

"Of all the grocery stores in Queens we ended up at the same one, who woulda figured the author would do that. GOD YOU'RE ALL SO PREDICTABLE!" 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a really personal chapter (Harry is basically the same as my ex), so I'm sorry if there are any typos or anything.


	4. Hugs with Bugs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Wade's jello date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is mostly bridge dialogue so I can push the plot in the next chapter. Thanks for reading!

Wade and Peter had decided to meet for lunch so they would both have time to do their own thing before patrolling that night. 

Peter woke up to Wade's good morning text,

_"GOOOD FUCKING MORNING PETEY PIE!!  
Scroll down for my address" _

Peter giggled, he knew exactly where Wade lived, it was an old apartment complex closer to downtown, it was only a few blocks from Peter's own apartment. Peter was excited to meet Wade. Peter didn't have much of a social life outside of school and work, and "work". Of course he always had M.J. but she was in Pennsylvania getting her masters degree.

Peter planned to go to Wade's for jello and then after he would swing by the Daily Bugle to drop off some newly edited pictures of Spider-man and then he'd catch up on some homework before patrol. So around one in the afternoon he got dressed in his favorite outfit, a red sweater, a navy blue jacket, and skinny jeans. 

 _"DP was right, my ass does look good,"_ Peter thought as he looked in the mirror one last time before grabbing his keys and heading out the door.

~

Wade had woken up to the boxes yelling at him because,  _who the fuck invites someone over for just jello?_ They were right of course, so Wade wracked his brain for a drink to go along with jello. He decided vodka would have to do. He also made some nachos because they served as both an appetizer and a light meal. Peter and him had settled for a lunch date, which was not Wade's idea because lunch dates are definitely for old people who have to get to bed by seven. But it was what Peter wanted so, here he was in his freshly laundered red hoodie, jeans, and his mask of course. 

Looking at the clock he saw that it was only around one, and didn't normal people have lunch around two? So Wade decided he had time to paint his nails, he settled on a blue color similar to Spidey's suit. Wade was always careful to not do anything with his hands until his nails were completely dry, because no matter how hard he tried he always ended up smudging them, and he absolutely hated that. One time he'd cut off his finger because he had smudged his nail and he didn't have any nail polish remover. 

As Wade was enjoying an episode of Golden Girls and drying his nails, the door bell rang. Wade glanced at the digital on the cable box, it read  _1:30_. He wasn't expecting Peter until like two at the least. Either way he went to open the door being very careful not to smudge his nails. 

Peter casually stood outside a crooked smile on his face. He was holding a bunch of balloons. 

"PETEY!" Wade yelled and ushered the man inside. 

"Hi," Peter said almost shyly and handed Wade the balloons.

"For ME?" Wade said taking the balloons. 

Peter noticed Wade's hands at that moment, they were terribly scarred. But Peter didn't find them repulsive at all, he was more intrigued. They were so unique. Then he noticed Wade's nails. 

"WOAH! Dude... nice nails," Peter exclaimed.

Wade visibly smiled behind the mask and looked down at his hands to admire his unsmudged nails. Then realization dawned on him, he quickly rushed to the bedroom and came back with gloves on. 

"I am soo sorry you had to see that Petey-pie," Wade looked very uncomfortable, he rubbed a hand behind his neck looking down. 

Peter felt bad, he had just come to the guys house and he was already making him feel uncomfortable. He took the man's hands in his.

"Hey Wade... it's a waste of nail polish to wear gloves," Peter carefully slipped the gloves off Wade's hands and handed them back to him. 

Wade was completely dumbfounded. This guy was amazing! Absolutely super fucking amazing. Most people would've ran a mile or atleast given him a look, but Peter was completely unphased, he wasn't even wearing a mask, he was just utterly unphased. 

"Um- Okayy... we can sit in the living room," Wade pointed to a white couch set and a metal coffee table. Peter went to go sit down, and appreciated Wade's apartment for the first time. For some reason he hadn't expected this level of clean. The beige carpet was soft, the white leather couches looked brand new, and the white walls were stainless. Peter's apartment was no where near this nice. Wade even had a nice size flat-screen hanging on the wall, and the large windows on the adjacent walls let in a lot of light, and a nice view of downtown Queens. 

Wade came into the living room balancing the nachos, jello, grey goose + glasses, plates, utensils, and the balloons. He was doing well on his own, but Peter quickly got up to lighten the load. " _Damn this guy is a fucking saint,"_  Wade thought, but was glad for the help.

The two men sat down and enjoyed their vodka and nachos, Wade cracking multiple jokes, and Peter never missing a beat. They talked about almost everything from how weird Doc Oc was to how cool it was that there were different dimensions. In a lull in the conversation Peter decided to ask Wade a more personal question, the guy didn't seem like the mysterious type.

"So Wade, got any ex lovers you need to rant about? Cause I totally dumped a lot on you last night," Peter said taking another bite of the green jello. 

Wade smiled and took another gulp of vodka, "Baby boy, I got a lot of exes and they're all rant worthy." 

"Well, any in particular?"

"There was this one blonde chick in Vegas that was pretty clingy," Wade chuckled.

Peter almost spat out his drink, "You're STRAIGHT?!!" 

At that Wade completely lost his shit. He fell on the floor and started laughing. He laughed for what seemed like forever, he laughed so hard tears came to his eyes. 

"Oh god!" Wade said in between laughs, "Petey I'm about as straight as a bouncy ball!" 

After a few minutes Wade was able to compose himself and he climbed back onto the couch his abs aching.

"Nah baby boy, I'm what millenials call pansexual," Wade chuckled and then added, "It means I like to fuck in kitchens." 

Peter laughed in relief, "I'm sure there are a lot of pansexuals that would disagree with your definition."

Wade looked at Peter a large grin visible underneath the mask, "NO I'M SERIOUS! Ask any single one of them." 

Then Wade decided it was his turn to ask Peter a more personal question. The voice boxes were telling him not to be weird, or creepy.

"What about you Petey? Are you only into eggplant or do you like cats too?" 

 _Because that wasn't weird at all asshole_ the voices boomed, but Wade didn't care because Peter started laughing. 

"No... actually I'm straight," Peter smiled. Now it was Wade's turn to choke on his drink. He stared up at Peter in astonishment. The voice boxes were going insane, and Wade was left speechless for a moment until he came up with a sly remark.

"No straight guy has an ass as nice as yours," Wade said defnitely. Peter laughed and blushed a little at that. The sound of Peter's laugh made Wade feel warm and fuzzy inside and it brought a smile to Wade too. 

"You're right- You're right," Peter said in between laughs, "I'm what millenials call bisexual." 

Wade was washed over with relief, even though he had seen it coming.  _Haha "coming"._ Peter was attractive, graceful, and he was overall a great guy. Wade could tell this was one of those times he just wouldn't be able to control himself. He was undoubtedly going to fall for Peter and he knew it, and he wasn't even upset. He just hoped Peter wouldn't be upset when the time came. 

The two men settled in comfortable silence, Wade was humming _you are my sunshine_ not terribly off-key. And Peter was able to notice the little things about Wade's apartment. There was nothing personal anywhere. Everything was blank, not even a picture on the wall, there were a few dvd's but they weren't all revealing. It made Peter almost sad, why hadn't this man added something personal anywhere? Then Peter looked back at the masked man. His muscles were visible even through the red hoodie. Peter wondered what the man under the mask looked like, what were his eyes like? Was his face covered in the same scars as his hands and neck? These questions seemed at the moment very very important. And he theorized many images of what Wade may look like, and all of them were attractive. Then Peter realized he was already starting to form a crush on a man he barely knew, _and_ he had just gotten out of a relationship. Guilt hit him like a shock-wave and Peter grabbed the bottle of grey goose and chugged down a few glasses.

"Woah Spidey!" Wade looked shocked. It had been three hours and the nachos, and jello had long been gone. Now the Vodka was too. Peter put down the bottle with a bang and looked at Wade his eyes hazy.

"Wanna do something fun?"

Wade nodded, a little unsure. Peter got up from the couch and ushered Wade up too, "How would you like a Deadpool, Spiderman picture on the front cover of the Daily Bugle next week?"

Wade was filled with pure joy, _that would be one sexy motherfuckin' picture,_ "THAT WOULD BE AMAZING!" 

Peter giggled, "Okay then go get your suit on." 

Wade hurried to the bedroom which was really more of a weapons room and put on the red spandex. When he returned to the living room Peter was splayed on the couch in his Spider-Man costume. It was a really sexy sight, and part of Wade wanted to jump on the guy and fuck him right there. 

~

Peter had stripped into his Spider-Man costume which he never left the house without and sat on the couch until Wade returned. And _Oh BOy_ did he return. The way the spandex hugged the man's arms and chest had Peter swooning. This guy really was something else. Peter got up and took the camera out of his satchel bag, flashing a quick picture of Wade. 

"HEY!" Wade laughed mockingly grabbing at the camera, which Peter pulled out of his way. 

"Come on," Peter laughed, "while the lights still good."

~

Deadpool and Spiderman ended up on a tall building in the business district, they were far enough that they wouldn't be disturbed, but low enough that Peter could get a good angle of the city. Spiderman crawled along the building and webbed his camera to the side of one building, he had tested the angle multiple times previously. Then he drew a thin line of web which he attached to the shutter and he made a thin barely visible web connecting about five buildings. Looking satisfied with his work, he stood next to Wade.

"So basically we gotta jump in front of the camera and do a cool pose and thats it really."

Wade was impressed by the intricacy of it all, "Wouldn't a selfie-stick have been easier?"

Peter knudged him, "Easy doesn't get you good pictures DP."

"Take out your guns and fire when you hit the web," Peter sounded professional but not unkind.

He shot a web at a building a few yards away, and grabbed Deadpool by the waist and swung off. Wade was taken completely off guard, with Peter's arm around his waist he barely remembered to take out his guns. He flipped around in Peter's grasp facing the sky and just as the two men broke through the web Wade shot out two bullets. It was definitely worth the waste.

Spiderman swung back towards the original ledge and picked up his camera. The old style camera still ran on film, but he was certain that the picture was a good one. He quickly hugged Wade, taking the Merc by surprise.

"Thanks for the jello Wade, I'll cya around," and with that Peter swung away. _Did he just hug Wade? What was that about? Oh god._  

~

Wade went back to his apartment and chugged down a bottle of beer, it was useless cause he never got drunk but it helped because Peter had just hugged him and he was going to lose his shit. It was time for Maximum Effort get Spidey in your pants.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise the next chapter will be much more dramatic.


	5. Furiously Wrapped

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter buys Organic Tomatoes and Nick Fury is annoyed as always.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so so sorry this chapter is so late, but I had to go to Canada to meet the merc himself.

Peter woke up with a jolt, OH MY FUCKING GOD! A wave of guilt crashed over him. _Did I just- oh fuck._ Peter scrambled out of bed and furiously brushed his teeth. Realization had dawned on him, first Wade had saved his fucking life, then he had helped Peter get through his break-up, then Peter had fucking ate all of Wade's jello and drank all his vodka, and then Peter had made money off of Deadpool's picture without so much as a thank you. Peter felt unbelievably like a jerk, this guy had saved his life and Peter's thank you was balloons?! Forget ultimate spider-man, Peter was straight up the ultimate jerk.

 

He quickly put some clothes on and rushed to the store, he bought a bunch of green jello packets, and he bought all the nacho ingredients, price be damned he got organic tomatoes because the guy had saved his life, he deserved over priced tomatoes. Then he got a twenty dollar gift card for amazon because that was basically as good as a visa. Then Peter rushed home again and wrapped everything really nicely. Even the groceries which he put in a basket first. Honestly it looked like fucking Christmas but Peter knew this alone wasn't enough to pay his debt to Wade. He then rushed over to Wade's apartment and furiously banged on the door.

 

~

 

Wade had been up all night thinking about Peter, he was aching trying to figure out what that picture looked like. _What if it was blurry?!_ The voices had yelled at him and Wade had really thought about shooting his brains out, he decided that that was overdone, and instead he drank a liter of anti-freeze like the rich house-wife he was. He decided to spend the whole day in bed watching obscure youtube videos and surfing the net, he didn't have any jobs today anyway. His bedroom was overcrowded with stuff because he had had to buy new couches for Peter's visit and the old couches were stuffed badly into his bedroom along with all the other trash that had been in the living room.

 

Wade was comfortably stuffed under the thick covers of his bed scrolling through his busted up laptop, when the doorbell rang. Wade groaned, he wasn't expecting anyone and it was too much work to open the door. He decided if it was a pressing matter whoever it was would just break down the door, and if it wasn't they'd just leave. After awhile the bell turned into a loud knocking, and Wade just turned up the volume on the tentacle porn.

 

~

 

Peter was really sad outside the door. He contemplated leaving the wrapped goods outside the door for when Wade would return, but then he realized that he was in fact in Queens, and Wade probably wouldn't get to the wrapped goods before someone else did. He decided he would text Wade and see where he was, but of course he had forgotten his phone at home, and if Wade was inside then walking all the way home and back seemed terribly wasteful. Peter decided the best thing to do was crawl up the side and knock on Wade's window.

 

So there was Peter four floors high balancing a very large wrapped gift basket. He was being very careful not to crumple the wrapping paper and when he got to Wade's bedroom window he was shocked by what he found.

 

Wade was sitting maskless in his bed which was completely surrounded by trash. The man would've had to climb over all of that to get even a foot into the living room. Peter excitedly tapped on the window glad at having found Wade.

 

Wade looked up at the window and saw Peter, he was pleasantly surprised. But then he was struck with insecurity, he dove under covers and grabbed his mask. Then he went to the window, forgetting about the porn. He opened the window and Peter effortlessly crawled in.

 

"I'm sorry you had to see that," Wade said frowning, rubbing his hands together in anxiousness. Peter frowned, he hadn't meant to make Wade feel uncomfortable, he had wanted the exact opposite. _God, I really am a jerk._ In fact Wade's face was beautiful, even in the bad lighting Peter saw the sharp yet soft features of Wade Wilson. The scars stretched over his face too, but just like the others they added to Wade's uniqueness. Peter had imagined many versions of Wade's face, but all of them paled in comparison to the real Wade Wilson, who was a hundred times more attractive than anything Peter could've thought of. His eyes were a dark color, and Peter ached to look at them better.

 

"NO! NO- Wadee. You're gorgeous- I- I," Peter blushed profusely, and Wade was completely caught off-guard by the words. He was about to reject the compliment when Peter blurted out,

"I'm so sorry Wade, I- you saved my life and I didn't even think to thank you, I'm just the most unbelievable jerk that's ever lived, but- I know this doesn't make up for anything really but, I'm so sorry Wade- you have to believe me, I got you this," Peter stuttered over his words, not completing a single sentence. Wade was worried the man would fall apart into robotic pieces.

Peter shyly handed over the basket, and Wade looked at Peter in complete surprise. This guy got him a gift basket? How was he so fucking nice?! Wade broke through the wrapping paper, wripping and shredding it. He admitted it wasn't everyday he got a wrapped present, maybe a long time ago when his mom was still around, but definitely not since he was around five? He didn't really remember. Anyway the unsuspected gift made him happy.

 

Inside the oversized basket was more wrapped things, Peter had wrapped everything, even the bag of nachos, and the gift card. In a few minutes Wade had unwrapped everything and he found all the ingredients he had used in his nachos the other day. Everything from sour cream to banana peppers. He also found several packets of green jello which made him smile. Wade's smile was mirrored by Peter, because the spider was happy that his gift was welcome. Wade also found the amazon gift card which he thought was adorable because everyone knew that an amazon gift card is the next best thing to a visa. Peter was such an adorable jerk it took all of Wade's strength not to wrestle him to the bed and cuddle him forever.

 

"Peter... I don't know what to say? Thank you..." Wade said genuinely. Then Peter's face paled, and Wade wanted to kick himself.

 

"No... don't say thank you this is- this is my thank you," Peter was flustered by how selfless the man in front of him was. Peter moved back to the window when the bottle of anti-freeze caught his attention, it was completely empty.

 

"You got a car in this room too?" Peter joked as he stepped out on the window ledge.

 

Peter couldn't see Wade's sad smile, "Something like that baby boy. I'll cya tonight."

 

With that Peter was gone, and Wade was alone with a pile of groceries that he didn't need.

 

~

 

That night Spiderman and Deadpool met on one of the city's many rooftops. They were only five minutes into patrol when Peter's Shield Com started beeping.

 

"OOooh fANcY!" Wade said poking at the device on Peter's arm.

Peter instinctively moved his arm and elbowed Wade, "I gotta go..." Peter was about to swing away when another message made him stop in his tracks, "Um... Wade? They want you too."

 

Wade was caught off-guard. Sure he had done jobs here and there for Shield but he had never dealt directly with any real superheroes. He was after all the anti-hero. Wade shrugged, "I guess Fury wants to suck me off." Wade said coming closer to Spidey who started violently laughing at Deadpool's comment. Fury was so stuck up just the image of him sucking off Wade of all people was about the funniest thing ever.

 

"I wouldn't want you to be late for that climax," Peter laughed as he grabbed Wade around the waist, and swung off. Wade was again caught off-guard. His crush was holding him by the waist as they swung miles off the ground. If this wasn't a turn-on he didn't know what was. But Wade fearful of becoming an actual dead pool in the middle of a busy New York street wrapped his arms around Peter and swung around so he was on Peter's back. The feeling of being so close to Peter was mesmerizing, Wade dropped his head into the crook of Peter's neck. He could smell Peter's scent, a mixture of soap, ink, and sweat. This moment felt so natural, Wade didn't want to be anywhere else ever again.

 

The sensation wasn't lost on Peter. Wade was hugging him tightly, his strong large arms wrapped around Peter, and his breath on Peter's neck. He was surprised he had enough concentration to not send them both plummeting to the concrete. Too soon they were at Avengers Tower, and Wade was forced to let go of Peter. The two men awkwardly stood on the landing deck for a second before entering. Jarvis guided them to a board room, and inside they found none other than Nick Fury and Captain America. Yikes.

 

"So you didn't want to inform us about this supposed team up?" Fury was able to sound furious (pun sort of intended) and look calm at the same time, and it was unnerving. Caps arms were crossed and suddenly both Peter and Wade had the distinct feeling of being called into the principles office to find their parents waiting with a lecture.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapters gonna be fun.


	6. *4th Wall Extra: Wade*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Wade Wilson Special

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> {White}  
> [Yellow]
> 
> I went all the way to Canada to get this, and this all he wrote so... I'll post it anyways.

HIYA THERE! Deadpool here.

[God, that's so overused]

Whatever, it's nice, simple and good. 

Anyways... excuse the boxes. They're ya know... fuckheads. HA! 

{Yeah and we're in your head so that makes your head just as fucky}

I KNEW THAT GODD!!

ANYWAYS! 

I'm Wade and the author came all the way to Canada to meet me during a mission, almost got killed and all, thanks to me he's good. So basically he was all polite and everything and was like, "I'M WRITING THIS FANFIC AND I'D LOVE FOR YOU TO WRITE A PIECE."

So of course my lovely cancer filled heart had to say yes, and using whatever interdimensionary skills the original author gave me I wrote this piece, edited and stuff by non other than the shit head author.

Basically he asked me to write about Peter... ya know Parker aka Spiderman.

[Which one?]

{Yeah for real! What timeline}

Guys its fanfic, it's all pretty blurry.

So anyway here's what I think about my baby boy, Petey-pie, arachnid with the ass. He's absolutely precious. I mean the groceries was soo cuteee. CUTER THAN UNICORNS! Also like helloooo, organic tomatoes!! That just spells love doesn't it.

[It spells tomatoes asshat]

{Actually it spells organic tomatoes}

Shhh. IT SPELLS LOVE!

Listen, I'm just a man... and they wrote me super horny okay. If I could have Peter under me right now I would... but at the moment Fury is sitting in front of us... also with Captain America!!!! WOAHH!

I mean I'm all for orgies, but... then there's society.

SOOOO BASICALLY I'M HERE TO CONFESS MY UNDYING LOVE FOR HE WHO IS SPIDERMAN!

... or she depending on the fic.

ANyways sexuality and shit aside. Jeez I say anyways a lot-

[Yeah and you say so at like the beginning of every fucking sentence]

Whatever!!

I really like Spiderman, Peter, BABBYYY... and I can't wait until the author to get his fucking shit together and writes the smut. I mean who does he think he is? Delaying everyone. LIKE WHO CARES IF IT'S RUSHED!! 

...isn't that a band?!

Anywho, I really like Peter he's sweet and soft looking. And yeah I'm hella insecure and shit about how I look but i mean... maybe I can put a mask on him.

SHIT! Then I can't see his eyes. Maybe like those sunglasses where they can see you, but you can't see them but the other way around? YEah!

Okay I'm bored now, all you's got to know is Peter is mine, and I will shred any competition. EVEN A SHREDDER!

{Are you insinuating Peter would get with a shredder}

I don't judge whiteyyy!

 

SOOO BYEEEE GUYYSS/GIRLLSSS/PEEOOOPPLEEE IN GENERALL!!

MAybe cya around maybe? YEAH JUst keep reading. We'll be back after the cOMmErCIal BREAK!

THERE'll Probably be a commerical for a PAN or something... hahahahahh8aoi;j. VERYY FUNNNY PUNNY LMAO.

M"KAY BYEE ໒( ∗ ⇀ 3 ↼ ∗ )७ 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked it then give me some feedback and I'll do one for Peter. Obviously his would be a lot more thought out.


	7. Post-Happy Stabbing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The lines have been crossed.

Peter and Wade stood awkwardly in front of the disapproving looks of the supers. Cap motioned for them to sit down with a single finger, and the two stumbled into the high backed chairs. Fury's eyes seemed to burn a hole in Peter and he was glad for the mask. 

It was Wade who spoke first, "Is there like a team sign-up or something? Or do I have to email someone?"

Peter would've laughed if not for the glares that bore down on Wade, of course Wade would've been the first to speak. Of course Wade would save his ass once again. Peter was basically useless.

Fury folded his hands, "Spiderman you are SHIELD property, you cannot be seen with a known mercenary unless you're taking him down," and Cap added, "This is not how a future Avenger should act." 

Peter was dumbfounded, first, property of SHIELD, yikes!! And second, future avenger, whatt?! 

Again it was Wade who responded, "PROPERTY? That sounds like some next level government bullshit," the anger was obvious in Wade's tone. The merc had said exactly what Peter had been thinking and he was forever greatful. Cap's stunned looked gave Peter the courage to speak up.

"The team up was unofficial... and- Deadpool hasn't killed anyone during our time together," Peter spoke quietly looking down. Wade was too angry at Fury's earlier comment to notice Peter's tone, but if he had he would've been a little dissapointed at the use of the term "unofficial". Wade loved spending time with Spiderman, and he wouldn't trade it for the world. 

Fury's reply was cold and harsh, "He is a murderer, and a psychopath... shit I would almost consider him a supervillain," Fury unforgivingly jabbed a finger in Wade's direction. 

Wade had half a mind to rip his hand off, but stayed seated for Peter's sake. The jab at Wade wasn't lost on the spider. He would take all the shit Fury wanted to give him, but calling out Wade was way too far over the line. Peter looked directly at Fury, the large eyes of his costume bearing into him.

"Call him a psychopath one more time," Peter's voice was slow and aggressive. Wade was impressed, and shocked that out of the whole conversation Peter chose now to get defensive. His heart fluttered at the idea that Peter fucking Parker was defending him, him of all people. 

Cap intervened, "Son, he's a freak... you don't belong with someone like him." 

This was the end, Peter's buttons had been pushed. He stood up from his seat knocking the chair back. He grabbed Wade surprisingly gently and pulled him up too. Wade got up guided by Peter's arm, he was completely speechless at the sight. Spiderman was absolutely seething.

"Don't contact me again, unless its for an apology," his voice was deadly calm. He unlatched the SHIELD Com and threw it on the table, glancing at the two supers once more before swiftly exiting with Wade. Deadpool used the oppurtunity to comically throw up a choice finger in their direction. 

Peter didn't say anything until they had swung to a safe rooftop. Wade didn't know it at the time, but it was Peter's apartment building. Spiderman almost tore off his mask. His entire face red with anger, and his eyes full of sorrow. He took a few steps towards Wade, placing his arms on his shoulders. Peter felt completely miserable for what had happened, the merc had been nothing but kind, and he had been called all those terrible things. 

Peter searched the eyes of the masked man, "I'm so so sorry Wade, I- I don't know what to say... I never would've brought you if- I'm so sorry Wade," Peter choked in a sob. Wade was completely stunned at the man in front of him, that was on the verge of tears because there had been some name calling? Wade was completely used to being called a freak, and a psychopath, and much much worse. Most times he accepted them as truth, I mean he did have a mirror. Apparently though Peter was upset by it all?

Peter unlatched the taller man's shoulders and pulled him in for a hug. Tears streamed down Peter's face. He was so sorry for what had happened, he would never know how to repay the man in his arms. 

Peter was crying into him, and Wade was stuck between shock that his crush was hugging him, and immense heart break that he was crying. Wade didn't want Peter to cry, he hated that he had caused Peter's unhappiness. Now he felt like a total jerk,  _ugh this is all my fault!_ Wade's immense arms came around Peter soothing the smaller man. Wade rubbed his hand against Peter's back, and they were both surprised by the intimacy of the moment.

"Shhh, baby boy. Don't cry pleasee. I'm so sorry," Wade whispered. At that Peter broke away from Wade looking with shock at the masked man.

"How-? NO WADE! This is- THIS is all MY fault. I'm the one who is sorry, you didn't do anything wrong at all!" Peter was at a loss. After everything he had put Wade through, here he was apologizing? APOLOGIZING?? To the man who got him killed and verbally abused? In all the confusion Peter didn't know what possessed him, but after he was glad it had. 

He stepped toward's the masked man and in one swift motion he pulled off the mask to see Wade's surprised face,  _god he was so beautiful_. Peter reached up and kissed Wade on the lips. Peter latched on, kissing Wade like he was air. In that moment, he was Peter's air. Peter marveled at what he had in front of him, this man- this man was utterly perfect. 

Wade was completely shocked at the whole situation. The voice boxes had crashed, and Wade's train of thought had completely derailed. He didn't know where he was, or even what timeline. All he knew was that Peter, fucking Spiderman was kissing him. He had to be dreaming. His lips were locked with the Spiders and Wade couldn't breathe, he didn't want to breathe. His heart pounded out his chest, and he thought he might combust, he thought this might be the end of him. After all this time all he needed was this kiss to finally end him permanently. 

It all happened so fast, Peter's heart was racing. He let go of Wade, who looked completely shocked, his eyes were hazy and he stood limply. Blood rushed to Peter's face and realization dawned on him, embarrassment coursed through his entire body and he ran down the side of the building and quickly into his room and into the bathroom and dunked himself in cold water. 

Wade stood awhile longer on the roof. His fried brain was still trying to process what had happened. He was utterly happy, a faint smile on his lips. He ran his hand over his chapped lips, and basked in the glory of the past moment. His heart was still painfully thumping in his chest, and Wade couldn't help but feel a loss. What if Peter hadn't liked it? What if it was all a dream? What if Peter never talked to him again? What if he was imagining it all? Wade took out a small knife from his sleeve and ran it through his chest a few times, until he fell to his knees and bled out on the rooftop. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully all the readers, and the merc himself are satisfied with this chapter. There will be more. And yes there will definitely be smut... just don't know when.


	8. Tomato Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade wakes up in someone else's bed...

Wade woke up in a bed that wasn't his own. The blue walls that surrounded him were foreign and he had absolutely no idea where he was. He tried to remember anything, and then he realized that last night Spiderman had kissed him... and that he'd stabbed himself. But where the fuck was he right now? He made to get out of the bed and realized that he was no longer wearing his Deadpool suit.  _What the actual fuck?_ He had half a mind to think this was some shitty dream inside a dream but he swung out of bed and realized how relaxed he actually felt. He hadn't slept that well in forever, actually. He was staring into the mirror, he was wearing large grey sweatpants and a nice blue t-shirt. 

He looked around the room he was in, there was a small wooden desk covered in textbooks and papers, and the walls were covered in beautiful photographs of the city. 

" _This is a pretty dope room,"_ Wade thought, and the voice boxes had to agree. Wade was just about to put his hand on the door handle when the door slowly swung open. Peter popped his head in and was surprised to see Wade awake.

"Heyy," Peter said smiling broadly. Something finally clicked in Wade, he was in Peter's apartment, this was Peter's room.  _OhMYfucCKINGgOD!_

"Uh- hi?" Wade said, he wasn't sure what to do with himself. Peter was also unsure of himself, he had ordered tacos because he knew Wade liked Mexican and he had washed and repaired the Deadpool suit, but  _fuck_ the guy he had just kissed was in his bedroom. 

"Listen Wade- about last night... uhm... well," Peter stuttered over his words and he rubbed the back of his neck. He couldn't meet Wade's eyes. 

"Anyways... um- I got tacos? If you want? And your suit... it's- I tried," Peter's cheeks reddened as he shifted from one broken sentence to another. This was definitely new, he had never been so bold in his life. No one had ever made him feel this way before. Just looking at Wade, with those beautiful brown eyes, and that patchwork skin that caught the light like nothing else. While embarrassment shook Peter to his core, he didn't regret anything. 

Now it was Wade's turn, he had expected to wake up on the rooftop and walk home for a shower, but now he was in clean clothes and basically everything was very awkward and confusing at the moment. 

"Uhm... tacos sound good," Wade said with a smile. He wasn't used to serious situations, no he liked things to be non-chalant and funny, but his fried brain couldn't think of anything witty to say, and his fucked up heart was beating so loud he couldn't think.

Peter smiled at Wade's comment and gestured to the kitchen, the small island was set up with plates and glasses. The two men sat down and began to eat in awkward silence. They both wanted to say something, ask something, do anything, but neither of them could. So they just ate, not looking at each other. After the tacos were gone, Wade looked up at Peter.

"These tacos were really good," he was being absolutely sincere. And Peter's heart fluttered a little, he was going to reply but Wade finally had to ask.

"Peter, what am I doing here?" Wade tried to giggle the question off, but the gesture was lost. Peter looked directly at Wade, the man in front of him really didn't know? 

"I went up to the roof after... and I found you, you were dead," Peter choked on the words. He remembered all too well what had happened. After calming down he had gone up to the roof because he loved the view and the cold air. But this time he saw Deadpool sprawled on the concrete roof in a pool of his own blood and a knife in hand. Peter's heart had broken, had he been the one that caused this? He had picked Wade up and taken him to his apartment just a floor below. The costume had been soaked through and Peter couldn't stand the sight. He had cleaned Wade up as best he could, he had gone to the store to find some clothes for the man, and he had put the man in bed for reasons unbeknownst to him. 

Wade's heart clenched, he realized that Peter had been the one to take him, to take care of him. He was horrified and happy at the same time. He had never meant for Peter to see any of that, but now he had, in fact the man in front of him looked at him with no sign of disgust. This was definitely new. 

"Thank-" Wade was about to say but Peter interrupted, "Listen I get it, I overstepped. And I'm really sorry Wade, and I totally understand if you never want to see me again... or if you want to just pretend none of this happened, but- I don't know..." 

Wade was absolutely shocked, "Petey?! Really?! You just put my lifeless corpse in your bed, and you fucking kissed me, god Peter! You're fucking amazing!!" 

Peter was dumbfounded, this was not at all how he had imagined this situation going at all. He had thought Wade would be mad, or disgusted at the least. But this? 

It was Wade's turn to be possessed, he jumped from his seat and closed the distance between them. Neither man realized what was going on, but neither man would have wanted anything else. Wade's hand came down on Peter's soft, blushed cheek, and Wade kissed Peter so softly. Peter kissed back his hands coming around Wade's face. Just a moment later the two men seperated still holding each other they stared into each others eyes.

"Wade?" Peter whispered, "What are we?" 

Wade didn't know what to say, of all the times to be speechless, "What do you want us to be?"

Peter was uncertain, insecure, "I really like you Wade."

Wade's heart fluttered, and he inhaled sharply at Peter's words. All the awkwardness of the previous moments had faded, and now Wade knew this was it. All his insecurities lifted away for a moment and he allowed himself to smile. His smile was large and toothy, stretching across his entire face. Peter's heart melted at the sight, and he was glad he had confessed. He mirrored Wade's smile.

"I really like you too Spidey," Wade laughed followed by Peter. They let each other go and Wade took a seat. The two men laughed, all the tension, and insecurity had vanished. 

"So a Spider and a dead pool like each other huh? What's next?" Peter chuckled. 

Wade grinned he took a knife and cut a slice of tomato into a heart shape. He offered it to Peter, "Will you be my boyfriend Webs?" 

Peter laughed and took the tomato from Wade, "I accept your tomato heart DP." 

Wade didn't remember a moment that he had been happier, and Peter was practically glowing with this newfound relationship. 

 _"This beautiful, selfless man is myy boyfriend,"_ Peter thought to himself and smiled, and Wade was thinking exactly the same thing.

~

The two men spent the rest of the day just relaxing, they did the dishes and watched tv. Wade introduced Peter to the Golden Girls, and they spent the day just talking, laughing. 

Wade was back to his witty self, and Peter was always quick with a comeback. They spent the whole day running around Peter's apartment, they played with nerf guns and before long it was dark outside. 

"Cya around Webs," Wade said placing a soft kiss on Peter's cheek. 

"Cya around DP," Peter said bringing the larger man into a hug.

~

They both fell asleep with thoughts of the other swimming in their mind. 

Peter reveled in his sheets that still smelled like Wade, and dreamed about what tomorrow might hold. 

Wade went to sleep with a smile on his face, " __Whose the fucking boss?! I AM!" and the voice boxes had to agree.


	9. Explosive Spandex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To get with a bug you need to blow up a building.

"HEY SPIDERBABE!" Wade yelled jumping into Peter's arms. They were both in costume on one of the city's many rooftops. Peter's quick reflexes allowed him to catch Wade just in time. 

"Hey Wade," Peter replied with a masked smile. The two men were both extremely content with their newfound relationship, and now meeting for patrol was one of the most looked forward to moments of their day. Peter slowly put the merc down and the two sat down on the concrete ledge. The city was always beautiful at night, but something about the company made it even better. 

Wade was absolutely high on the fact that Spiderman was his boyfriend.  _That amazing ass belongs to my boyfriend!_ Peter was such a sweet guy, he was kind of nerdy but in a cute aesthetic way, and boy was he hott. Sure Wade had been around... like a lot. But he couldn't remember the last time he had fallen for someone like this. 

Peter on the other hand was still trying to process everything. He had just been through a breakup... and now he was already with someone else? But Wade... he was just so amazing. So selfless and kind, the man could take down entire armies but he also helped strangers in grocery stores, and he cooked. I mean who didn't want a guy who could cook! 

Both of them were snapped out of there inner love monologues when an explosion about five miles away drew their attention. They were up in seconds and swinging towards the mess. 

"What the hell is up with all the explosions?" Peter yelled back at Wade who was spidey-back riding him.

"Baby boy if I knew I would sock all these motherfuckers for wasting precious tnt!" 

Peter snorted, of course that was what Wade was worried about. He barely had time to appreciate Wade's strong arms wrapped around his chest before they were at the explosion site. Half the building had collapsed and the rest was on fire. 

"See!" Wade yelled comically gesturing at the building, "They couldn't even get HALF the building down! WHAT'S THE FUCKING POINT!" 

Peter couldn't help but laugh, but of course they had to go and investigate. The two waltzed into the burning building and searched frantically for anyone, this time however there was nobody.

"What the fuck? There's no one here?" Peter was beyond confused... why would somebody blow up an empty building? 

Wade was mumbling to himself about amateur bad guys who didn't know the difference between a switch blade and a carving knife, when a bright light shined through the gaps in the burning cielings. The two men both stared up at it, and through the noise of the fire they heard, "Spider-man please go to Avengers Tower with your accomplice." The voice was indistinct but the message was clear. Peter sighed, he was not in the mood for meeting the cyclops and his avenging eagle. While Peter stood in a burning building cursing his own existence, Wade was already walking out. 

"Come on babee," he said gesturing for Peter to follow, and so he did. Once they got out of the building Peter wrapped an arm around Wade and shot a web to the next high-rise, and they swung gracefully towards Avengers tower once again. Neither of them noticed the silent click of a camera as they did.

~

Soon the new couple found themselves back in the board room that had honestly started it all. This time though it wasn't just Fury and the Cap, this time it was Tony motherfucking Stark, Clint goddammit Barton, and Natasha hot as hell Romanov. Both Wade and Peter glanced across the group, and damn was it a sight to see.

"So did you guys just not invite the Doctor? Or..." it was Wade who spoke first. Natasha and Clint visibly repressed smiles, but the rest of the team was still as statues. Nobody answered Wade's question and the awkwardness settled in.

This time though Peter wasn't going to be the stuttering mess of the previous night. He crossed his arms over his chest, and refused to sit down which to Wade's dissapointment meant he couldn't sit down either.

"So, are you here to apologize?" Peter's voice was full of acid. Wade's smile stretched under his mask, this wonderful man was back to defending him. It was a nice feeling, it was very rarely Wade felt taken care of, but now that Peter was in the picture Wade had a feeling that would all change.

It was Captain Bald Eagle that replied, "Listen son... I'll apologize for offending anyone, but the situation needs to be addressed."

This was not the reply Peter was looking for, and he made that clear. The Spider was fuming only five minutes into the meeting. He had started an argument with Rogers and it wasn't going well. But the dramatics was cut short when Captain America said, "What's your interest in him anyway?! It's not like he's your lover!"

Peter was caught off-guard. And Wade muttered something about plot devices but he wouldn't say anything. In a perfect world Wade would have hugged Peter right in front of everyone and showed the Captain how wrong he was, but this wasn't about him. This was Spiderman's world.

"What if he was?" Peter's voice softened, but his gaze held firm on the super soldier.  It was Steve's turn to be caught off-guard. He wasn't expecting this question, he was expecting more retorts. Of all the things he'd said this entire night, this is the one that got to Spiderman? Really?! 

"What?!" was the only response he could find.

"Yeah, what if Deadpool and I are lovers? Huh?! What would you say then?" Peter's gaze was fierce, he dared anyone to question him. 

Everyone in the room was speechless, the argument had taken an unexpected turn and it was getting increasingly more uncomfortable. 

Black Widow finally decided to break the tension, "So are you? Together I mean?" 

Deadpool turned toward Spiderman searching for confirmation, but Peter wrapped an arm around Wade's waist and brought him close. 

"Does it make a difference?" Peter was in a very sassy mood, and Wade was  _really really_ turned on. 

" _OhmYgoD this is so hott!"_ he thought to himself. Clint was smiling from ear to ear, and Natasha seemed pleased with herself. Tony was looking from Cap to Peter and trying not to burst into laughter, but he couldn't hold it in and his booming laugh filled the room. 

"Dammit Steve you walked right into that one!" Tony blurted, "I mean they both wear spandex... you had to see it coming!" 

Steve was not amused and was stuttering a chain of "what's" and "how's" when Fury interrupted the fiasco.

"Mr. Parker this relationship cannot continue, it's a matter of image," he said matter-of-factly. If this wasn't overstepping, then overstepping didn't exist. 

"What the actual fuck?! You glorified cyclops, you can't tell us who to date!" it was Wade who spoke, he was trying not to laugh at the ridiculous sentence that just spewed out of the super spy's mouth. The other Avengers, except of course Steve, also looked completely taken aback. 

"Fury? Really?" was Tony's response, and Clint and Natasha just crossed their arms. 

"Mr. Wilson if you really cared about Peter you would understand this, you're simply not good for his image," Fury's non-chalantness was scary on a good day. 

Now Wade was feeling really insecure, what if he really wasn't good for Peter? Maybe he should leave Peter... maybe...? But Peter's voice snapped him back to the present situation.

"No fuck that! Okay?! My image is already fucked up! I don't understand why Shield or Hydra or whatever other bullshit organization cares so much about what I do with myself. So just leave me the fuck alone! Don't worry about my image! Don't worry about me becoming an Avenger! Because I don't want to be part of a team that's this fucked! So just leave me alone!" 

With that Peter and Wade once again walked out of the board room. Back inside Clint, Natasha, and Tony chastised Fury and Cap for being idiots and worse but nothing much was achieved. 

~

Wade and Peter had gone back to Wade's apartment. Peter was absolutely furious and he didn't have words, he just wanted to punch everything. 

"Baby, hey, hey! Calm down alright... it's okayy," Wade soothed, and Peter just curled into him. He was still upset, who the fuck did they think they were.

"I mean something's gotta be up their ass since they blew up a whole building just to get you to meet up," Wade said his voice was completely serious, and Peter burst out laughing. 

"OhMG WADEE!" he laughed out, god was he lucky. Peter reached up and turned Wade's face and met his lips, "You're so amazing," Peter mumbled against Wade's scarred lips. The merc's heart skipped a few beats, and he kissed the beautiful, amazing man sitting in his lap like he would never kiss again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this... I know I've been just trying to really build up the plot and the story and I have no idea where this is going to go, but I promise it'll get better.


	10. Spideyclean Eh!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade's called out on a mission, and Peter makes dinner for two.

Peter woke up that morning on a couch, Wade's couch. Without regret Peter realized he hadn't gone home last night and that he had fallen asleep on Wade's couch. The apartment was oddly quiet, the Merc with the Mouth nowhere in sight. Peter got up and entered the kitchen. On the small island was a plate stacked high with pancakes and surrounded by syrup and butter. The smell was absolutely wonderous and Peter sat down greatful for the food. Before he could dig in he noticed a small note...

~

Wade had woken up to his great surprise to find that Peter was still curled into him. He was glad he had invested in the new couch and savored the moment awhile more before he expertly maneuvered out of the other man's soft grasp. He gently layed Peter down on the couch and draped a blanket over him.  _God he's cute even when he's sleeping, he's like a little drooling hippo!_ Wade washed up in the bathroom and donned a pair of sweats and a large red hoodie. He was aimlessly walking around the apartment not knowing what to do and not wanting to wake Peter when one of his many burners blinked with a new message. It was for a job in Tobermory? Canada!  _Jesus that's like an eight hour drive one way!_ But Wade wasn't the kind of guy to turn down a job so he put on his Deadpool uniform and strapped on all his many guns, packed a duffel bag of ammo and bombs and made Peter some pancakes as quiet as he possibly could before running out the door North to the Maple State! Of course he didn't forget to leave the love of his life a note.

~

_Goood Morningg Baby Boy!_

_It's your friendly neighborhood Deadpool here!_

_I was called in for a job in the home state Canada, eh!_

_So I'll probs be back around din din._

_Enjoy the panqueques!_

_(ΦзΦ) Kiss ya later! Lots of fluff! (ΦзΦ)_

- _The Pancake Maker_

~  
  


Peter smiled at the note and ate some of the pancakes and wrapped the rest up. Oddly enough he didn't feel like going home, and he kind of missed Wade. Not knowing what else to do with himself he thought he'd clean up Wade's apartment. Sure the place was uncharacteristically clean, but Wade's room was another sight altogether. Maybe it was overstepping but Peter couldn't think of any harm that could come from it so he decided he'd clean Wade's room. 

He entered the room and the smell was atrocious, like something had died inside. There were two couches blocking the doorway and Peter's first order of business was to get them out of the way. Of course the idiot Peter was he didn't think to question why Wade had two couches stuffed in his small bedroom. Blessing the gift of super strength Peter grabbed the couches one by one and pulled them out into the hall. He was surprised Wade even got them to fit through the door at all. 

Once the couches were out in the hall Peter could finally see the floor and it was absolutely disgusting. The floor was covered in bottles, broken glass, laundry, bullet shells, and a lot of other stuff. Soon Peter had the floor mostly cleaned up and he was kind of freaking out, there were blood stains everywhere, on everything.  _Was this all Wade's?_ Yeah he had killed himself that night on the roof, and he wasn't the most stable guy but jeez was he really this suicidal? 

Peter found some cleaning material in the hall closet and he got to work. He scrubbed the floors, the walls, even the cieling. He got most of the blood stains out and the room smelled a lot better. He had packed all the garbage into bags and had left them by the door he didn't want to throw it out yet because he didn't know if Wade still wanted any of the stuff. Who knew maybe one of those bottles was a limited edition? The room was finally breathable and Peter was proud of himself, if not a little horrified by Wade's obviously violent tendencies. The bottle of anti-freeze made Peter's heart clench, and he was really upset that someone like Wade would feel so sad. All those jokes, and that toothy grin was all just a facade for the much sadder Deadpool inside and Peter's heart ached at the idea. Sure Peter himself hadn't been the happiest person, yeah he'd been through depression, anxiety, contemplated suicide on multiple occasions but he'd never... Peter really did like Wade, and he wanted to make him feel better, because that's what Wade deserved, Wade of all people deserved to be happy. 

~

Peter decided that tonight would be the ultimate date-night. It was already late and Wade had said he'd be home by dinner, so Peter would make dinner. It couldn't be too hard and he could always call Aunt May for help. He decided quesadillas would have to do and Wade already had all the ingredients. Peter ripped open a box of ground meat that was in the freezer and threw it into a frying pan. He added some oil and once the meat looked brown enough he added some onions and green peppers. It didn't look too bad, but god did the onions sting. After the meat was done he washed out the pan and placed some tortillas in and added the meat and cheese, some tomatoes and lettuce and once it was melty and looked good he put it all on a plate.  _Okay! That wasn't too bad!_ Peter set up the island with plates and glasses, Wade surprisingly enough had some candles which Peter lit and it really set the mood. Now all he had to do was wait for his boyfriend to get back. 

It was around nine and Wade still wasn't back so Peter decided he would text.

**P:** _Wadee where you att?!_

**W:** _On my wayy, at the tunnel baby boyy._

**P:** _Hurry up! I have a surprise 4u_

**W:** _OOOOHHHH FORR MEEE!?!?!! This dammnn tunnels nott movviinggg!! SOSOS._

**P:** _LOLOL the only tunnel you need to worry about rn is minee!_ ;)

Peter didn't know what was going on with him recently, but  _omfg did I just send that?!!!_

**W:** _..._

**W:** _I'M ON MY WAY!_

_SHIT MOTHERFUCKING CHRIST_ was Peter hot! Wade who was previously sitting in a yellow cab singing along with the cab driver to "I wanna dance with somebody" threw a wad of cash in the guys face and ran down the grid locked tunnel, because his immortal life would end before he didn't reply to text like that! Soon Wade had run all the way from the Lincoln Tunnel to the East River. And yes he had taken the Lincoln Tunnel because he had come through Jersey...  _yikes!_  The wind was knocked from him and he thought Spidey really was smart with those thwippy web shooter thingies. He took a ferry ride from a weird guy called Schrooder to Queens and soon enough he was in front of his apartment door.  _Shit I should've washed up before!_ Wade thought as he finally realized that his suit wasn't in the best condition, kind of burnt and with a lot of holes. But it was too late he had already knocked and...

~

Peter heard the knock on the door and almost tripped over himself running to it. He opened the door to the sight of a very tarnished Wade. His suit was riddled with bullet holes and slightly singed.

"Wade!" he yelled and hugged the larger man, and then dragged him inside. Gesturing towards the kitchen Peter led him to the island. 

"You made dinner?!" Wade said happily. There was a plate of quesadillas on the island and there were candles burning, it was adorkably romantic. Peter looked pleased with himself and gestured for Wade to sit down and dig in.

"Hold on baby boy, lemme get into something slightly less burnt," Wade said and he left towards his room. Peter ran after him to see the reaction to his new room. Peter had left the couches in hall way.

"Uhmm... Petey? What's with the couches?" Wade looked back at Peter who was smiling ear to ear.

"Just keep going you big lug!" Peter said and he put his hands on Wade's shoulders and guided him to the bedroom. 

Wade couldn't recognize the bedroom at all, there was a floor first of all, the walls almost gleamed, there were new sheets on the bed and the air smelled lemony. It was amazing, Peter could be on HGTV for flipping houses, but  _fuck_ he had been in Wade's room. He had seen, cleaned all the blood stains, all the bullet shells, and all the other shit that was Wade's inner cage. Suddenly Wade was extra glad for the mask because he was good at hiding his feelings from his voice but eyes never lie.

"WOW PEtEY! this is AMAZING! You didn't have to do all of this," Wade said a fake smile under his mask. Peter looked very happy with himself and Wade would hate to break it. He told Peter he'd take a shower and meet him, and Peter went back to the living room to watch Ru Paul. Wade shucked off his costume and weapons which he threw into the "to be cleaned" box and went in to take a hot shower. The water felt good running down him, and he sat in the tub wondering why Peter hadn't run away yet. Some stray tears made it down his cheeks without notice, and it was half an hour before a knockon the door brought him back to life. 

"Wade? You okay?" Peter's voice was sweet, gentle, and full of concern. 

"YEah! I'll be right out BABE!" Wade yelled and he rolled out of the tub and dried off. He put on his previous sweats and hoodie and met Peter in his room. Peter was staring at Wade's face which he got to see so little of, but was so amazing. The curves of the scars, the mottled reds, whites, and browns, those chocolate brown eyes that could melt souls, and the way his lips curved, the way they felt-

"Hey SPIDEYY?!" Wade was waving a hand in front of Peter who was snapped out of his reverie.

"Oh-, hi.. yeah sorry just daydreaming," Peter said. Wade was still skeptical and insecure about Peter's non-chalantness to his skin but he went along anyway. He wrapped an arm around Peter and the pair walked back to the kitchen.

"Hmm, what were ya dreamdaying about?" Wade asked, and Peter's reply was not one he'd expected. 

"Tunnels," Peter really had no idea where this quippy forward version of himself had come from, but he wasn't fighting it. Wade growled and pushed Peter against the wall and engaged him in a hungry kiss. 

"You're so fucking hott," Wade breathed between tongue and lips. Peter's arms wrapped around the back of Wade's neck and their bodies brushed together.

"MMm not as hot as you," Peter moaned biting Wade's bottom lip. And this Wade could not believe, this was too much. Wade owned a mirror, he knew what he looked like and he's seen boiled meatballs that looked hotter than he did. He moved away from Peter a harsh laugh at his throat.

"Don't lie to me Peter," this was the first time he'd ever said something so cold to the younger man. His voice wasn't cruel or demanding, no it was more sad and desperate. Peter was shocked at the sorrow that dripped out of the merc's dark eyes, the way he held himself defensive, weak. He had gone from a towering one man army, to a child who was desperately lost. 

"Hey, hey Wadee," Peter soothed stepping closer, but the man moved away. He pressed himself into the opposite wall as if hoping it would swallow him up.

"You saw my room Peter, you saw what I'm really like. I-" Wade's voice was cracked and he was trying desperately to stop the tears. Peter didn't know what to do, he wanted so desperately to hug the merc and to erase all possible doubt and insecurity. He wanted to throw all those bastards who ever hurt Wade into a sink-hole. 

"Wade, you are an amazing person, and you're so goddamn beautiful. And whatever you've been through... whatever you're going through you don't have to do it alone."

Wade was shocked by the words, the truth in Peter's eyes, how did he get this lucky? What heaven had this gift of man come from? Peter stepped closer, placing two hands on his shoulders, "You were there for me when I needed you Wade, let me be there for you." Peter's innocent eyes held Wade's and Wade knew this was it for him. This man was the single best thing that had happened to him in his crappy lifetime, and he would do whatever it took not to lose it. Wade brought Peter into a hug, holding onto him like a lifeline.

"Come on sweety, let's go eat..." Peter said after awhile and the two men found themselves sitting between some mostly melted candles and quesadillas. Wade had broken out some red wine, and they started on the quesadilla and they realized that it was oddly crunchy for meat. 

"Petey did you defrost the meat before you cooked it?" Wade asked, hairless eyebrows raised in amusement. Peter's jaw dropped.

"What the hell is defrosting?" Peter said, and Wade's booming laugh filled the room, soon followed by Peter. Nonetheless they finished the quesadilla which had wayy too much cheese and was pretty awful except for the fact that it was made with love. Over dinner the two decided it was time for twenty questions. Along with some wine soon Peter knew almost everything about the fuckhole that was Weapon X and how screwed up the cancer and everything was. And Wade found out about the bullshit that is Oscorp and how Uncle Ben died. All in all the origin stories had been told, and the couple had a new respect for their partners. Between them they had been through everything, and they could handle whatever else the world would dare throw at them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all the readers!


	11. Closet Pics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Wade go to Aunt May's house...

About a week later and the Spider and the Merc were stretched out on Peter's old couch that was sure to have at least a million dollars in loose change hidden in it. Wade had introduced Peter to the gift that is Bea Arthur and the two were now watching Golden Girls on some sketchy website with so many popups it wasn't even funny. Wade however who is adept at diffusing bombs always managed to click the right "play" button. They were into about the third episode and Peter wasn't really that into it, but he watched it for Wade who was overly obsessed. Wade had very few things in his life that made him happy, and Peter would make sure those things never went away. 

The past week they had spent a lot of time with each other, Peter would study and Wade would throw a ball against the wall, and Wade would clean his guns and Peter would help put them back in their "special spots". Sure when Wade was called out for a job or when Peter had to go to class or work they wouldn't see each other, but they made sure to continue their snapchat streak and they always met up somewhere even if it was just for a few minutes between classes. And they had had one of the most epic mario kart races in the history of nintendo. Peter was surprised Wade's controllers hadn't been smashed into bits. 

"Heyy... HELLOOO???" Wade was waving a hand in Peter's face, and he was snapped back to the present. Wade's and his legs were tangled together under the blanket, and Wade was staring at him with a question in his eyes.

"Petey if you're not into this I TOtes get it, we can do something else," Wade said sweetly taking Peter's hand. Wade's hand was warm and calloused and the feeling was absolutely amazing, Peter would hold his hand forever if the world would let him. 

"No Wade, don't interrupt Bea," Peter said smiling sweetly and he untangled his legs with Wade's and he slid up the couch until he was nestling next to Wade, his head resting on Wade's hard chest. He settled comfortably with Wade's arm wrapping around him, and his heat melting into him. 

Now this was something Wade could get very used to: Beer, Golden Girls, and his absolute favorite Spider. This was Wade's idea of a perfect day, now the only thing he needed was some bad guys to come crashing through the window that he could shoot with one hand, simultaneously cuddling and impressing Peter. But that didn't happen... yet atleast. 

They sat like that until the episode finished and then Wade shut the laptop, "So sweet cheeks what do you want to do now?" 

Peter who was half asleep on Wade's chest looked up drowsily, those doe eyes would be the death of Wade. Peter moved himself up just slightly and kissed Wade's jaw.

"Hmm? We should just..." Peter was really comfortable where he was, and he wasn't in the mood for doing much. He kissed Wade's jaw again, and worked his way down his neck. Yes Wade could get very used to this. Peter hugged the larger man tighter, he was in the mood to cuddle. Wade loved cuddling! He pulled Peter up, and wrapped his hands around his lower back, and pulled Peter down into a kiss. It was soft and slow... normal. Peter could feel Wade's rough skin and his full lips. Wade could taste Peter's smooth soft lips,  _oh god he's perfect._  

"You're so beautiful," Wade whispered, combing a hand through Peter's head. Peter smiled from ear to ear at Wade's sweet words.

"God you're perfect you giant teddy bear," Peter yelled cuddling into Wade even more. Wade would've replied but Peter's phone started ringing. He grabbed it off the coffee table and put a finger on his lips to silence Wade. It was Aunt May telling him that his photos had arrived from the studio, and that she would leave them on the kitchen counter because she had to go to the hospital now for her shift. The call ended and Peter smiled up at Wade.

"You wanna go look at the pictures I took," Peter said getting up from the couch, untangling himself from the blanket.

"SURE! But who was that?" Wade asked also getting up.

"Hm.. oh that was my Aunt May."

"Ooh the famous AUNT MAYY. She seems kool."

"Yeah... she's pretty great." 

~

They got to Aunt May's house, where Peter used to live and let themselves in with Peter's key. The house was cozy, and well worn. Old well kept rugs covered the shiny wooden floors, and the walls were adorned with pictures. Peter led Wade into the kitchen holding his hand. Peter hopped up onto the kitchen counter and tore open the box with a knife. Inside was a large yellow envolope which Peter dug into and out came all the developed pictures he'd sent to the studio. Wade stood next to him as he flipped through each picture, showing Wade some of the nicer ones. Some of them were of Spider-man and they'd go straight to the Daily Bugle and others were just personal photography. He showed Wade each one, telling all about where he took it, why he took it. One of the pictures was of Wade's apartment building, except instead of looking like the low income housing it was, it was captured with the sun flashing behind it, muting the colors so the greys were darker, and the reds were deep. All of Peter's pictures captured seemingly ordinary things but in a way that made your breath catch. The colors, the lighting all perfect with no editing at all. 

At the end of the pile was the picture of Spiderman and Deadpool they had taken what seemed like ages ago. The two men seemed to glow, the webs they landed on invisible, and the bullets captured in stark contrast. The angle was perfect, and Wade took the picture in his hand, nope it definitely wasn't blurry. 

"Damn Spidey, you're... you're so good jesus christ!" 

Peter smiled and tossed the pictures aside, he used his legs which were previously dangling off the counter to wrap around Wade and pull him closer. Peter cupped Wade's face and kissed him. Surprised as he was Wade didn't hesistate, he wrapped his hands around Peter's back and felt up and down resenting whoever thought shirts were a good idea. 

"You know," Peter said, "Aunt May won't be home till dark..." 

"Oh  _fuck yes!"_ Wade yelled pulling Peter closer to him, a hand going up Peter's shirt feeling the muscles in his back and the bumps of his spine. The warmth of Wade's rough hands sent shivers up Peter.

"Mmh my rooms upstairs," he whispered into Wade's neck. Wade wrapped his large arms around Peter and lifted him off the counter, Peter wrapped his legs tighter around Wade's waist and his arms around Wade's shoulders never stopping kissing up his neck. Wade had just gotten to the stairs and Peter licked and bit at his ear causing his breath to hitch. And just as Wade was about to start the climb up the stairs the front door swung open. Peter saw who it was a moment too late, he had been too caught up in Wade. Peter basically jumped out of Wade's arms and was at least a yard away by the time the merc turned around. 

1\. Wade wasn't wearing his mask and he felt completely exposed.   2. The look on Aunt May's face was absolutely unreadable.    3. Peter's heart was beating so fast humming birds were jealous.

"Aunt Mayy! Hii," Peter said simultaneously exhausted and ready to run all the way to Mexico. It took almost an eternity for Aunt May to answer, and Peter's heart was thumping and he could feel tears making his eyes heavy. Wade was fidgeting very uncomfortably staring down at the floor because he understood the situation much too well. 

"Hello dear," Aunt May said, her voice held no emotion, "Would you like to introduce me to your friend?" She didn't smile. Peter opened his mouth to say something but she interrupted.

"I think we should talk in the kitchen," and with that she headed straight for the kitchen. Peter and Wade glanced at each other, and it took a moment of collecting themselves before they followed after Aunt May. 

She was sitting at the small wooden kitchen table and waited for Peter and his new friend to sit down. They sat down, Wade would've done anything for a mask at that moment, even a paper bag would've done. 

Aunt May smiled tightly, "I'm May Parker, I don't believe we've met." Her gaze felt like daggers to Wade, and he gulped and had to remind himself to breathe. He looked up at her not wanting to be rude, but he curled in on himself, "I'm Wade Wilson..." There was no quippy joke, no added syllables, nothing extra. Peter had never seen the towering man so small before, and it broke his heart.

"Aunt May.... I can explain," Peter sighed, if it wasn't obvious before it was obvious now. 

"No Peter. I just- What have I ever done that you wouldn't talk to me. What have I done that made you keep this a secret? I HAVE NEVER- Peter Benjamin Parker, I have NEVER been so dissapointed in you. So this is why you hate Harry all of a sudden, hm? Why didn't you just tell me Peter? You know it wouldn't have made any difference!" 

Peter placed his face in his hands, and Wade didn't know what to do. 

Aunt May turned towards Wade, "I'm sorry you have to be here for this dear," 

"Peter talk to me! I was there through everything in your life, and you decided that you could keep this from me? Don't I deserve more than that?" 

Peter looked up at Aunt May whose face looked completely still, except for the sadness in her eyes. She wasn't sad that her son was gay or bi or whatever, she was sad that Peter hadn't had the confidence to tell her. 

"I'm sorry Aunt May, I- I don't know. But, yeah this is Wade- for a few weeks now." 

Aunt May's gaze bore down into Peter and she pursed her lips. Then she turned to Wade and smiled warmly.

"So Mr. Wilson, how are you today?" 

Wade was trying very very hard to hide the shock, he looked at Peter's crumpled figure and back and Aunt May beaming at him.

"Oh. Well, it's fine... How are you? Mrs. Parker?"

Wade and Aunt May talked for sometime and it was an almost pleasant conversation. Then Aunt May got up from the table grabbed her bag - which she had forgotten to take with her to work, and is why she came back to the house - and said, "Well you'll have to excuse me I'm late for work, and Wade you really must come to dinner one day. Lock up when you're leaving Peter," and with that she was gone. 

Peter and Wade let out a collective breath and slumped back in their chairs. 

"Now that! Was scary... and I've literally been to hell." 

"Tell me about it! Jesus fuckk, but thank you Wade you did so well. And I'm really sorry.. I don't know what I was thinking," Peter sighed rubbing his temples.

"At least we have a dinner invitation," Wade smiled softly, and Peter did too. 

~

They went back to Peter's apartment and crashed into bed, they were both emotionally exhausted especially Peter. He curled into Wade who fell asleep relatively fast. Peter replayed the days events over and over again in his head, and tears streamed down his cheeks. Wade woke up to Peter's sniffling and wiped his tears away with his thumb.

"Hey baby boy," Wade whispered placing a kiss on Peter's forehead, "It's gonna be alright." 


	12. Breakfast Roses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ORDER UP: Smut with a generous side of fluff!

The next day Peter woke up to the sun shining bright through his bedroom window and the smell of... was that pancakes? He shifted in bed to find to his surprise Wade motherfucking Wilson in a frilly white apron, with "kiss the cook" embroidered in pink across the chest. He was also wearing a chef's hat, and had drawn a curly mustache on his face with a marker. 

"Wade.. wha-?"

"gOOD MoRNINGGS MYSWEET babyy BOYY," Wade yelled placing a kiss on Peter's forehead. And then he bustled out of the room. Peter was beyond confused, but such was life with Wade. Who soon hurried back into the smallish bedroom arms heaping with a shit ton of stuff. But Wade was extremely coordinated, and he swiftly bedecked the bed with a white cloth and set down a tray which was brimming with food. There was eggs (scrambled, omletted,  _and_ sunny-side upped), there was bacon (Canadian, American, and Turkey bacon), there was toast cut into triangles, with whole-grain, white, and wheat bread, with crust and without. There was all kinds of sausages cut up, and whole. There was potatoes in hash-brown form, and diced and seasoned. There was a stack of pancakes, and a side of waffles. There was glasses of orange juice, apple juice, cranberry juice, water, and coffee which sat next to a cup full of different sugar packets, and creamers, also a small cup of milk. And Wade hadn't forgotten the salt, pepper, and forks and knives. The only thing that surprised Peter about all of this was that Wade had managed to fit it all on one tray. 

"Baby is this all for me?" Peter asked shocked at the amount of food, and the care that had gone into each little detail. 

Wade looked at the floor and rubbed the back of his neck, "Yeah, I didn't know what you liked so I made a bunch of stuff... but if you don't like it I can make somethin else, I DO TAKE REQUESTS- and... or we could order in? OR go somewhere??? Anywhere... whatever you want-"

"WADE! WADEE!" 

Wade's mouth shut for just a moment and he looked at Peter.

"Wade, baby this is amazing!" Peter didn't know where to even attempt to begin, "You gotta sit down and help me eat this though."

Wade thought a moment before he sat down, "NO this is all for youu! I can't eat it, this is SPider fooood!" 

Peter mocked a pouty face and crossed his arms, "I won't touch it if you don't eat it, and spiders don't eat cold eggs." 

Wade groaned, "FINEEEEE" and he picked up a fork stabbed a diced potato and stuffed it in his mouth. Soon Peter was eating too, and between the two they got rid of most of the food. 

"So what's all this for? Breakfast in bed can't be just you being sweet," Peter asked between mouthfuls. 

"Ehh, you had a rough night... I thought you'd be hungry." 

Peter looked up at the merc who was picking at a piece of bacon, Wade had done all of this because he had had a rough night? Most people wouldn't even think twice before jumping a guy like Peter. Sure Wade was Canadian, but this was a new level of kind. Peter's hand came up to cup Wade's cheek, caressing the scarred skin underneath he moved Wade to face him.

"Thank you," Peter whispered and Wade wanted more than anything to melt into the beautiful man that was in front of him.  

~

They cleaned up together even though Wade insisted on doing it himself. Peter made sure to wipe off Wade's faux mustache. After everything was done, Peter locked his arms around Wade and brought him into a tight hug.

"Heyy baby boy, what's all this?" Wade sure as heck wasn't complaining, just surprised.

"You woke up, got dressed, went to the store, came back, cooked enough breakfast for a buffet, all without waking me up, served it, ANDD cleaned up and you're asking me whyy I'm giving you a hug??" Peter's expression was exasperated, "Sweety you deserve so much more than this..." With that Peter pulled the man down into a kiss. Wade's arms instinctively wrapped around the other man's and he returned the kiss. He could feel the soft plumpness of Peter's lips and the flick of his tongue on his own chapped lips (yes he had tried eos). Soon Peter could feel the merc's tongue against his own, pulling him closer with every flick. Peter came up on his toes, and bit at Wade's bottom lip releasing a low moan from the larger man. Peter shifted all of his weight into the wall of muscle that was Wade and wrapped his legs around the merc's waist. Wade's grip tightened and he was unsure of where this was all going. 

"Petey?" he mumbled the question into Peter's neck which he was kissing like a lifeline. 

"Mmh... bed..." Peter replied, he was much too focused on the feeling that was Wade, and he desperately wanted more. Wade moved to the bedroom never breaking the contact between his own lips and Peter's skin. Soon they were on Peter's bed, Wade's entire body pinning him down. They kissed fiercely, desperately. Peter's hands roamed over Wade's strong back, and soon he slipped up Wade's shirt feeling the shift of muscles on his scarred back. Peter couldn't get enough, his hands moved up and down trying to capture all of Wade all at once. Soon Wade shrugged off his shirt and apron revealing him in stark contrast. Peter's eyes couldn't absorb it all at once. For a moment he just stood staring at Wade's bare chest, the curves and lines of his abs, the way his skin stretched, the way the scars threw patterns all over him, each one special, perfect.

A wave of self-consciousness hit Wade, but soon subsided with the look Peter brushed over him. The man's big brown doe eyes examined Wade with artistic interest, with a sense of longing, and desire.  _Godd, he's blindd but he's perfectt!_  Wade leaned down and kissed Peter softly, sweetly, it was a thank you. Soon Wade's own hands were running up Peter's shirt brushing over hard nipples, it took all of Wade's strength not to rip the younger man's shirt off, and Peter wished he had. But instead Peter pulled his shirt off and now it was Wade's turn to be in awe at the smooth pale skin that covered Peter's lean form. His hard stomach was creased only slightly by the muscles underneath and Wade realized exactly how different they were.  _OPpoSITESS ATTRActt YA KNOW WHT THEYY SAYYY!_ Wade's hands ran all over Peter's chest and stomach, he kissed the smaller man's neck biting and licking leaving hickies wherever he could. He licked up Peter's abs sending a shiver through the man. 

Peter locked his arms under Wade's and pushed him over, bringing himself on top of the towering mercenary. Peter was achingly hard, and one glance at Wade's bulge confirmed he was too. Peter rolled his hips against Wade and sucked at one of his nipples. Wade moaned at the contact,  _mmh yeah this I won't ever get enough of._  Wade's fingers played at the waist of Peter's pants. He wanted desperately to get it off. Peter was too quick for Wade though and soon in a fluster of belts and pajama pants both men stood in boxers, amazed at the beauty of their partner. 

Before they could move on Peter burst into laughter against Wade's chest.

"HEYY! What's so funny?!" Wade knitted his hairless eyebrows.

Peter couldn't stop laughing, "Oh god Wade! You own Unicorn boxers?!" 

Wade pouted, "OWN?! Sweety I'm not Oprah, these are most definitely rentals!" 

With that both men burst into a fit of laughter. Wade motherfuckin Wilson was indeed wearing colorful unicorn boxers (who knew they made them in men's sizes). 

Still smiling his cheeks numb Peter grabbed at the stretchy waist of Wade's boxers and pulled them down, freeing Wade's erect member. Wade moaned and Peter licked his own lips, just looking at Wade made him even harder. He dropped down and bit at Wade's neck and collarbone, licking at the sensitive areas of his scarred skin, all the while he trailed his hand down the merc's chest until finally...

Peter wrapped his hand around Wade's thick cock drawing a moan out of the merc. Peter's thumb smeared the dripping precum over Wade's head, and he started pumping the length.   
"Mmmhh  _fuckk babyy boy!"_ Wade groaned in pleasure. This was so different from the usual one-night stands. 

Soon Peter had Wade on the edge, his own length reminding him exactly how hot Wade really was. Wade's hand ran up Peter's face curling a fist into his hair while Peter licked and bit at Wade's muscular chest. 

"Mmh Peteyy! S-soo good, s-so closee," dammit Wade usually lasted longer than this, it was just Peter. His smooth skin, his soft hair, those goddam fucking doe eyes! Wade's head rolled back, and his back arched up into Peter and he came with Peter's hand still on his dick. Gasping for breath Wade took a moment to appreciate the little things in life, like the way Peter's hands felt, how his lips curved up when he smiled, how that made the corners of his eyes crinkle just slightly. Peter was kissing the merc when he finally caught his breath. 

"Damn Petey, I should wear unicorn boxers more often," Wade panted, winning that smile and that sweet laugh from Peter. 

"No boxers is good too," Peter replied nipping at Wade's jaw. 

The merc's eyes darkened, "Agreed," he said, his voice gruff and he pulled Peter's boxers down and rolled him over, pinning him to the bed. Wade flicked his tongue across Peter's lips, earning him a lustful look from the man under him. Wade's mouth didn't stop there, he kissed down Peter's neck, his chest... His finger's ran over Peter's sensitive nipples and Wade's lips finally got to where they were going. Wade's strong hands clasped Peter's waist and held him down. He looked at Peter with his dark, reflective eyes and teasingly licked at the bitter precum on the Spider's throbbing head. Peter squirmed at the teasing, but was held in place by Wade's firm hands. Wade slowly licked up Peter's length, forcing the man's hands to clutch at Wade's bald head.

"Mh  _God_ you're such a  _teasee!"_ Peter groaned, Wade was fucking hot, and he was fucking hard and it was a lot of sensory overload. Wade smiled and finally swallowed Peter whole. Slowly testing his gag before finally reaching Peter's base. The warm wetness of being inside Wade's mouth alone was enough to bring Peter close. But Wade didn't stop there he slowly bobbed his head up and down looking up at Peter who was trying very hard not to moan loud enough for the neighbors to hear. Wade's dark eyes stared up at him, and his cheeks hollowed as his head moved up and down. 

" _FUCK you're soo fucking hott,"_ Peter hissed as Wade swallowed around Peter, sending jolts of pleasure through the smaller man. Soon Wade bobbed fast up and down Peter and he moaned and shrieked at the sensation. One of Wade's hands slipped off his waist and instead came around to clutch his ass. Wade would've mumbled something about really good cake, but his mouth was otherwise occupied. 

One more swallow and Peter was on the edge, " _AHH WAdeE, gonna- ...mm cum,"_ Peter almost squealed, and with that his back arched into Wade and the merc's throat was filled with hot thick cum. He swallowed most of it, and licked Peter's tip getting the last of it as Peter came down. Wade mumbled something about climaxes, and Peter watched as he licked the cum off his lips.  _Damn is he sexy_. Wade crashed down next to Peter and they kissed and laughed. Yeah this was very good.

"Whoever said morning sex was bad, pschh," Wade smirked at the bare brunette.

"This soo doesn't qualify as morning sex!" was the Web-head's reply.

"Um duh Petey, it's in the morning... it's morning sex,"

"Shut-up! Wade," and Peter playfully pushed the merc. Wade pursed his lips together in mock "shutting up". Peter brought his closed lips in for a kiss.

"Don't ever shut up! I love this merc's mouth," Peter whispered. 

Wade smiled and returned the kiss, he would never let go of the man smiling in his arms. 

~

Together they took a shower, and basked in the steaming water, and the scent of Irish Spring (Peter's favorite). They held each other, and loved each other, and there together they felt perfect together. They're pasts didn't matter anymore, here and now, this was what the universe was born for.

After they ripped the sheets off Peter's bed and threw them out, and together they adorned the bare mattress with fresh sheets. Then taking the welcome opportunity of new sheets they dove into bed and cuddled until they both fell asleep. 

When Peter woke up it was already dark outside and the city lights reflected across the glass, he was wrapped in Wade's arms and the merc slept peacefully next to him. He got lost in the moment, Peter had never felt this good around someone else. Somehow this big buff teddy bear of a man made Peter feel safe, Wade was a rose in a big city. And wouldn't Peter stop awhile to appreciate him. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will definitely include Peter having a real conversation with Aunt May.


	13. Taco Baths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter has real talks with Aunt May, and Wade takes a bath.

Wade woke up to his ringing phone. He had fallen asleep in a back alleyway after being made into a human shish-kabob by some crazy mutant girl.  _She was actually kind of hot._ Wade groaned and flipped open his hello kitty. The screen flashed with a picture of Spiderman surrounded by hearts, Wade answered.

"Hiya Webs," Wade tried hard to make his voice sound normal, even though his ribs hurt like hell and his skin burned all over. 

"Wade?" Peter's voice sounded muffled, like he was trying not to panic.

"Heyy, hey Baby Boy what's wrong?" Wade started to get up, ignoring the pain that shot through his legs and the burn of the suit against his skin.

"Wade, can- can we meet up? Like now? I-" 

Wade was up and walking fast in the direction of Peter's house, trying to pass of the limp casually, "Yeah, Petey-pie where you at?" 

"My apartment..." Peter was biting his lips and trying very hard not to punch a wall on the other side of the line. 

"BE RIGHT THEREE MA LOVER<3" Wade sing-songed as he ran to Peter's apartment (yes he sing songed the heart, its Wade Wilson). 

~

Wade finally got to the apartment, and his brain was driving him nuts. He wanted very much to peel all his skin off with a grater, and he was worried about Peter. The voice boxes were still fantasizing about the previous day, and all the other kinky stuff that could happen. Wade had had a rough night and he was not in the mood, he just wanted to take a nice bath and watch Golden Girls. 

Wade slumped against Peter's door and knocked with his elbow. 

Peter jumped up from the couch and ran to the door, Wade always responded so quickly it was almost impossible. He turned the handle and opened the door and Deadpool fell through. He hit the carpeted floor with a thud and he did nothing to get up.

"Your friendly neighborhood therapist has arrived!" Wade said weakly, trying to feign his usual exuberance. 

Peter threw out a hand and helped Wade to his feet, his Deadpool costume was in rags and Wade's voice sounded tired even with the exclamation points. Peter was worried about Wade now too. He didn't give two fucks about Wade's healing factor, even a paper cut would be enough for Peter to start worrying. 

They moved to Peter's ratty old couch and Wade slumped into the pillows, greatful for the cloud-like nature of the piece of furniture. 

"Wade what happened? Are you hurt? Are you okay?" Peter was looking at Wade, worry dripping from those doe eyes. Wade couldn't bear to see that sweet face do anything but smile.

"No, no baby it's all good. Just got my ass handed to me last night," Wade pulled off his mask so Peter could see his small smile.  _If this isn't Maximum Effort idk what is._  

Peter wasn't convinced but decided to let it go, Wade obviously didn't want to talk about it. 

"Anyway sweetums, why'd you waste your minutes calling my sorry ass?" 

"Wade..." Peter's look and tone chastised Wade for the self-depricating statement. 

"Anyway, I- I'm going to Aunt May's like now... to explain some more and stuff," Peter pursed his lips, he was not excited about the meeting at all. 

Wade's eyes grew with understanding, and he propped himself up and took Peter's hands in his own gloved ones. 

"Hey baby boy, it's gonna all be good okay?! Aunt May lovess you like THIS MUCH!" Wade stretched his arms out before bringing them back to Peter.

"I- I just don't want to lose her Wade... I can't lose her." 

"I know baby, but you gotta tell her that. She can only read your mind so well, she's not Xavier," Wade pulled Peter closer, draping an arm around him for support. 

"You're right Wade..." Peter smiled slightly. Wade always knew exactly what to say, the merc with the goddamn mouth. 

Wade kissed Peter's forehead, he was glad Peter called him of all people about this. They sat like that for awhile, until Peter was ready. Wade had pushed the burning in his skin to the back of his mind along with the voice boxes, and focused on Peter.

~

Before he knew it Peter was on Aunt May's front porch. Wade had offered to walk him, but Peter had declined, the merc was obviously in pain and he didn't want to make it worse. Peter rang the doorbell and heard the familiar ring echo from inside the house. He hadn't called before coming, but Aunt May had an open door policy. He hoped it was still valid after all the lies he'd told the woman. 

Aunt May opened the door and smiled, her face wrinkling with her smile. She hugged Peter and ushered him in. No matter what Peter was like a son to her, and she would always love him that she knew for certain. 

"Come on in dear, what brings you?"

They both bustled into the kitchen, and Peter took the opportunity.

"I just wanted to explain everything Aunt May, I- OH I almost forgot," Peter handed her the paper bag he was holding, "Wade made tacos for you." 

Wade had indeed whipped up some tacos with the ingredients he had stuffed Peter's kitchen with the previous day. Even though Wade had visibly had the worst night ever, he had made Peter tacos to take to Aunt May. Peter had told him not to, begged him even to stop but Wade had insisted that tacos made everything okay in the end. 

Aunt May took the tacos and served them onto plates, it was early enough for brunch and tacos were as good as anything. 

"Dear, I'm glad you came. But please Peter don't do anything you're not ready for," Aunt May sat down next to Peter at the kitchen table.

"I'm sorry I snapped last time, but I was just surprised. I want you to know that it changes absolutely nothing at all." 

Peter smiled at the woman's kind words, Aunt May was the most understanding person he knew. 

"I just- I'm sorry Aunt May. I really am sorry for lying. I just didn't want to lose you, I couldn't think what I'd do if I lost you."

Aunt May beamed, and hugged the boy. She was glad she finally had the opportunity to apologize for the way she behaved the other day. 

They ate the tacos, and wondered at how good they were, and Peter blushed when Aunt May complimented Wade.

"So is this why you broke up with Gwen then?" Aunt May asked tentatively.

"OH GOD! AUnt MAyy!! That was soo long ago. No I'm bisexual Aunt May I swing both ways." Peter laughed embarrased at his Aunt's interest in his love life. 

Aunt May chuckled, "That's good to know dear." 

"But really Peter? You dated Harry Osborn?! I could've told you, you're old blind Aunt could've told you that was a bad idea."

Peter burst into a fit laughter, Aunt May really was the best. 

"Yeahh, that ended soo badly... he still texts me oh my god, HE'S SO ANNOYING!" 

"Peter, just block him!" Aunt May said as if this was the most obvious thing in the world, this fifty three year old woman just told him to block his ex boyfriend. Peter couldn't believe how well this turned out. 

"But this Wade boy, I like him. He has kind eyes. And he can cook! You should just marry him now dear, put a ring on it!" Aunt May waved her hand in full Beyoncé fashion.

"AUnT MAyy!" Peter roared with laughter. He couldn't wait to tell Wade. 

~

Meanwhile Wade had taken a taxi home, because he was very tired and he was worrying about a thousand different things. He peeled off his suit part by part, throwing straps and ammo belts all over the living room and hallway. He had finally gotten his suit off and threw his katanas and guns into the "to be cleaned" box and headed straight for the shower. He filled the tub with hot water, and examined his skin. Where he had been cut up by the crazy lady was festering, and his other wounds had become scabs which itched like crazy. His ribs were feeling better though, which was a good thing. 

He stepped into the tub and sank into the water, he had probably illegally extended that part of the bathroom so he could install a tub where he could submerge himself completely without bending his knees. He sank back and let the soothing water mingle with his skin. 

"If you were a poet and I was a faultless muse  
If you were the hero, yeah, I'd take a bullet for you," Wade started humming bits and pieces of Sia's One Million Bullets. 

[ _You knoww that song doesn't really fit the scene buddy]_

_You knowww I don't give a shitt yellow!_

_{Yeah since when are you a musical expert}_

[ _I'm not tone deaf like you two!_ ]

_Can I please just take a bath in peace?_

[{NO}]

_UGHHHH!!!_

{ _Why don't you just stop whining and kill yourself like every other time!}_

_You'd like that wouldn't you, you little shit. Maybe I fucking will._

[ _Sorry to be a buzzkill, but we gotta make sure Spidey's alright first_ ]

{ _Shit, you're right! Yeah stop wallowing you dick, go make sure the arachnid with the ass is good_ }

_Fuckk, you're right. Poor Petey._

_~_

When Peter got to his apartment door he found Wade sitting outside with one of those reusable grocery bags. He was wearing a baseball hat and a black hoodie with the hood pulled up casting his face in shadows. His hands were stuffed in the pocket, and his jeans and sneakers were absolutely ancient. 

"Wade? What're you doing?!" Peter was confused at the sight. Wade knew how to let himself in,  _why hadn't he? How long was he sitting there?_  

Wade had been lost in thought and he jumped up with a smile at Peter.  _Yay Peter!_

"I wanted to make sure you were okay... and I brought board games!" Wade said, genuinely smiling. Peter wasn't crying and this was a good sign.

Peter unlocked the door, smiling at the crazy sweet wall of muscle that is his boyfriend.

"Oh Wade it went so well! She loved your tacos, and she said I should marry you," Peter beamed at the hooded man and knocked his hat off so he could see the beautiful face underneath.

Wade smiled, his mood completely turning around. Peter was smiling and happy, this was all Wade needed. 

"Eww, don't marry a boiled meatball!" Wade said wrinkling his nose, which in Peter's eyes was absolutely adorable.

Peter lunged at the man and hugged him, Wade somehow made everything alright. 

"But you're  _myy_ boiled meatball, and I love you," Peter said nuzzling into the Wade's chest as they stood in the entry way. 

Wade's breath hitched at the words,  _love? LOVE? Likee LOVE?!_ His heart started beating faster, and he was starting to short circuit, the boxes had already passed out. 

"Like... love  _love?_ Or...?" Wade was very, very unsure. 

Peter looked up from the embrace, just realizing the words that had slipped from his mouth.  _Shit! Oh my god, I'm gonna scare him away! ANd then he's never gonna come back, or he's gonna KILL HIMSELF! OH MY GOD! What if he doesn't love me back? BUT... Wow I really do love him, woowww._

"Like love love, like you saved my life, and you make me happy, and I don't know what I'd do without you," Peter looked up into Wade's eyes, he said it cause he meant it, and he was feeling brave today. 

Meanwhile Wade's heart skipped multiple beats, and his lungs weren't working properly, and his brain was fuzzy, and he was happy.  _Happy?_ He hadn't felt this in... had he ever felt this?

"I love you too baby boy," Wade breathed,  _ohmygodohmagodwowowowow!_

Peter smiled and brought his lips up, and Wade closed the gap. They kissed and it was soft and sweet, like they had all the time in the world. Wade felt strong with Peter's arms around him, he felt like he could do anything. They hugged tighter and they moved to the couch and cuddled staring out at the city through the window. Completely lost in each other, this was good. 

~

They got up a several minutes later, and Wade had moved the coffee table and was setting up the Game of Life, the little pieces were always so hard to get into the holes. And the fucking letters were hard to read. 

Peter laughed at Wade's grumbling and frustration and helped him get it all set up. They sat with a couple of beers and just as they had  picked their cars and Wade was about to spin, his phone buzzed.

He flipped it open and read the text. It was from Hawkeye?  _Really?_  

"What is it?" Peter asked, trying to look at the screen.

"BABY BOY!" Wade looked up smiling from ear to ear, "WE'RE GOING TO A PARTYY!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this chapter, it was fun to write. Next chapter will be very exciting.


	14. Civil War: Party Edition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bright Lights, Booze, and Sword Fights. What more do you expect from a superhero party?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still don't understand the spin to win thing in Life, how does it work?   
> \--  
> Also I imagined some really bomb ass remixes of  
> Who Gon Stop Me and Ni**as in Paris by Jay-Z and Kanye West   
> and also  
> Womanizer and Radar by Britney Spears

"YAY SPIN TO WINN AYAYYEYYAYA!!!" Wade rolled over the floor throwing little pink and blue humans at Peter.

"WaDE! WADEE!" Peter was trying not to burst into laughter,  _this adorable idiot!_

"WADEE!" Peter yelled again to no avail, so he decided the best thing to do would be to jump on the man... and so he did. Peter jumped on top of Wade who tried to roll away but was much to slow for Speedy Spidey. Peter quickly straddled Wade, preventing him from rolling. Wade made a pouty face and grabbed Peter and threw him over his head with his extremely muscular arms. Peter rolled into his landing quickly grabbing Wade's arms and sticking to them, so even when Wade tried to pull away he couldn't.

"HEYY NO FAIRR! You're using POWERS!" Wade whined pulling Peter hard so he fell on Wade's chest laughing. 

Peter purposely used his super strength and pinned Wade's hands above his head, and stradled his hips, "TOO BAD!" Peter stuck his tongue out, and Wade leapt up even under the restraint and closed his open lips on Peter's tongue and fell back down grinning at the shocked look Peter gave him. 

Peter brought himself down his lips almost brushing against Wade's, "What party?" he growled. 

Wade smiled and kissed Peter, locking his lips, running his tongue against the other mans. Peter pulled away, and sat up straight on Wade's stomach arms crossed.

"WADEE" Peter pouted, "WHAT PARTY??" 

Peter didn't go to many parties, but he really did love the whole aesthetic of parties. Wade didn't reply though, instead he wrapped his massive arms around Peter and brought him down.

"LEt me Kiss you before you unboyfriend me," Wade said in between kissing Peter's neck.

"I'm not going to unboyfriend you Wadee, tell mee!"

"UGH FINEE!" Wade overdramatically through his arms in the air and rolled over, causing Peter to fall on the floor. Before Wade continued his sentence he climbed on top of Peter, holding his shoulders down so he wouldn't squirm away from the party details.

"La FIESTA DE HAWKEYE!"

Peter's confused look, did nothing to ease Wade's worry.

"Baby you should really learn Spanish we're living in the U.S." 

Peter smacked Wade's side and rolled his eyes, "I took Spanish in high school you jerk! Now tell me!" 

"ALRIGHT FINEE! Hawkeye invited me to a party... and I have a plus one so you should totally come," after that Wade mumbled under his breath, "All the Avengers are coming." 

"WHAT WAS THE LAST PART WADEE?" Peter raised his eyebrows, there was obviously a catch. 

"All the Avengers are coming including Cap USA," Wade let out in one hasty breath. 

Peter visibly withdrew, he was definitely not in the mood to see Steve at a party. 

"NOO BABYY! DOn'tt make that faceee, pleaseee. Come on please comee with me please please please," Wade was using his puppy-dog eyes to the max, but Peter didn't look ready to budge. 

"Come on Webs, let's go rub our sexuality in his straight face," Wade said kissing Peter's adam's apple. 

"Hmm, I guess I'll go... only cause you asked though," Peter pretended to pout. All things aside the idea of going to a party with Wade sounded like a lot of fun. 

"YAYAYAAyAYA MmmLOVEYOUU" Wade screeched and started kissing Peter wherever his skin was exposed, which brought a laugh out of the man.

Peter kissed Wade back, hands searching under his modest sweater. Peter rolled his hips against Wade and bit his bottom lip, lust raging through both of them. Wade groaned, and his eyes became dark with wanting, yeah Peter couldn't wait to get his hands all over the merc. 

~

The next week Peter was at Wade's house buttoning up the shirt Wade had bought him. It was a Friday night, and the couple was getting ready for Clint's party. 

Peter was going to wear his usual white shirt and black suit which was really the only thing he owned, but Wade had said Peter had model potential and Tyra would kill him if he wore a funeral outfit to a party. So Peter had let Wade pick his outfit and damn, did he look good. Wade after much contemplation had settled for a dark blue silk threaded slim fit shirt that probably cost a fortune. Peter buttoned it up, and it fit perfectly, and it looked fucking sexy. Peter shrugged on the black blazer which Wade had also bought, and was putting on his tie which Peter had brought. 

Wade strode into the bathroom where Peter was getting dressed, he was wearing his Deadpool mask and gloves and a suit, black with a white shirt, and a black bow-tie. He looked oddly sexy, like some crazy Christian Grey type, it was pretty hott. 

Wade looked over Peter, and cooed, "Damnn you're sexy!" Wade loved a man in a suit. He grabbed Peter's hips and slowly pulled him closer, smelling the Lacoste Perfume, Wade's absolute favorite (Rouge). Wade's gloved hands reached up to Peter's tie and pulled it off smoothly, "Baby boy, you're too sexy to wear ties." 

Peter would've just fucked Wade right there and then but they had a party to go to. Surprisingly enough the nerd inside Peter absolutely loved parties. Especially after becoming Spiderman when his senses had been turned up times ten. The strobe lights, and the music so loud you could feel it in your chest, the gyrating bodies. This is what Peter loved. 

Wade had never figured Peter to be the partying type, but Peter's excitement practically oozed out of him in the black Uber they had gotten. 

"This kind of reminds me of Partition," Peter said leaning into Wade a hand on his thigh, Wade willed himself not to get hard. 

"Baby Boy... unless you're an exhibitionist you might wanna wait awhile," Wade tried to keep his voice neutral, which made Peter smile. He layed a kiss on Wade's masked cheek and looked back out the window at all the city lights. Yeah the city was always more romantic at night. 

They drove into the city, passed Times Square and Central Park until they finally got to a Warehouse looking building on a private lot. Purple lights streamed out of the glass windows of the warehouse, and the music boomed even from the street. 

"Snazzy location," Wade observed, and they stepped out of the Uber thanking the driver. Anyone who willingly drove in the city needed to be thanked. 

They entered, the loud bass washing over them, Wade's arm wrapped around Peter's waist,  _tonight was going to be the night_. There was a huge crowd on the dancefloor, mashed together and washed over in colorful flashing lights. Everything glittered, there was a glass in everyone's hands and the DJ booth was backlit and silhouetted. Peter's chest pounded with the music and a smile stretched across his face, which in turn made Wade smile. 

Hawkeye stepped out of the crowd of mashing bodies, where he had been dancing with Natasha. He strolled over to the two men and had to yell over the music to be heard.

"YOU MADE IT!!" He yelled throwing his arms out.

"YOU BET YOUR ASS WE DID" was Wade's reply, and before they knew it Peter had pulled Wade into the crowd. Put Peter on a stage by himself and he couldn't dance for his life, but put him in the middle of a drunken overstimulated crowd and he was your man. He danced with Wade, jumping and practically glowing with exhiliration, occasionally grinding against the merc. Wade wasn't going to complain, this side of Peter was new and it was a  _major_ turn on. Who knew this nerd could dance! 

The music slowed for awhile, and Peter was parched, he drawled over Wade, "Come on sexy let's go get something to drink!" 

He took Wade's hand and pulled him out of the crowd and led him to the bar. All the drinks were free, courtesy of Clint "lets get drunk" Barton. 

"Wanna do shots?" Peter asked expectantly. 

Wade shook his head laughing, "Sure baby boy, whatever you want!" 

And with that the bartender placed two glasses on the bar and poured up the tequila. Peter and Wade grabbed the glasses and tipped back, again and again and again. Peter was buzzing all over, and Wade - who didn't get drunk - just went along with Peter who dragged him back into the crowd a glass of straight vodka in his hand. Drinking and dancing, Peter was definitely drunk. Everything swooshed around him, and the music and lights drowned his senses. He was aware of Wade, and  _oooh Wadee_ _!_ Peter forgot the glass he was holding and it dropped to the floor shattering into a million pieces, he used his free hands to pull Wade closer wrapping his arms around the man's neck, lifting part of the mask, and kissing him never missing a beat of the music. Wade pulled him closer by the hips until they had merged into one dancing figure.  _Wade looks so pretty in these lights_ , Peter wanted to lick at the colors dancing off Wade's face and that's exactly what he did brushing his alcohol drenched tongue over Wade's nose.

"Petey! YOU ARE SO DRUNK!" Wade said, but Peter couldn't hear him. Suddenly Peter felt the urge for another drink and he twisted out of Wade's grasp and ran toward the bar asking the bartender for another drink. The bartender very aware that most of the people here were superhuman wasn't going to refuse anyone and handed Peter another drink. Wade caught up to him and placed a generous tip in the bartender's jar and Peter downed the vodka in one swoop and banged the glass down on the bartop. He climbed up the bar stool and grabbed the bartender's tie, the guy looked very afraid. Peter pulled the guy closer and verociously kissed the man on the lips. The nameless bartender's eyes opened in shock, and Wade's jaw fell open under the mask.  _What the shit?!_ Peter knew he was kissing someone, was he kissing someone? 

"Mmm, I like your tie," Peter said letting go of the bartender and climbing down from the bar. 

Wade's arms came around Peter, and Peter kissed the merc again tongue running through him. All Wade could taste was sweat and alcohol, but damn was Peter a good drunk kisser. Peter soon let go of Wade though and ran back into the crowd to dance.

Wade looked over to the bartender, "I would apologize for him, but he's a good kisser so you're welcome I guess." 

The bartender tried to compose himself as Wade tried to figure out where the drunk Web Head had gotten to. 

Wade finally caught up to him in the middle of the crowd dancing with none other than Black Widow and Hawkeye. Natasha was wearing a black jumpsuit that just happened to be sheer in a few areas across her stomach, arms, and legs and it did wonders for her breasts. Clint was wearing a black slim-fit dress shirt with the sleeves cut off, and his usual purple glasses. Peter was dancing between the two obviously loving the attention. 

Natasha noticed Wade and waved him over, "Quite a guy you got here DP!" 

"Oh don't I know it," Wade yelled over the music and joined in on the dancing. After awhile the crowd swelled and their proximities closed. Peter unknowingly rubbed against Clint, and he didn't stop there. He turned and brushed a hand over the man's toned chest and placed a kiss on his neck. 

"Yuor purrrtyy," Peter's words were slurred. 

Wade's eyes were wide under his mask, but Clint just laughed it off. The kid was obviously drunk, and it wasn't the first time a guy had kissed him. Peter's attention span however was very short at the moment, and a flash of Natasha's curly red hair had him caught. He grabbed her waist, and she glanced over at the stunned looking Wade who did nothing to stop the scene. Being the sexy russian spy she is: she kissed back when Peter's drunken lips met her own, she did put a stop to it though when Peter's hand reached for her ass.

"Okayy sweety, stay safe!" she said and handed him back over to Wade. Wade who at the moment didn't know whether to be jealous or turned on. Drunk Peter was a thirsty little bastard and he would definitely get it when he sobered up. 

"Mmmhh Wadee, les go fine,,, Steve," Peter slurred hugging the wall of muscle.

"Petey, I doubt that's a good idea sweety," Wade tried his best to reason with the drunken remains of his boyfriend. 

Peter couldn't hear anything Wade said, all he saw was a blur of red in the bright lights, his body swung from him and he danced to the music. The music pounded in his ears and filled him up, the lights were blinding and he felt as if he were on a carousel somewhere exotic. 

Wade was trying desperately to contain Peter, but everyone was in good moods and so was he. Peter wasn't hurting anyone and Wade was honestly enjoying himself. The company was good, and as long as Peter was safe Wade didn't see any reason to go home just yet. So Wade let Peter go, not too far, but enough.  _As long as he saves the last dance for me haha._  

Peter was spinning and spinning, and screaming, this was the greatest moment ever! He felt so absolutely alive! Soon though everything tipped sideways and the world stilled. He bumped into something extremely hard. At first he thought it was Wade,  _that sexy wall of muscle_. Peter's hands stroked up the muscles and he knew this wasn't Wade.  _Where was Wade?_ Peter was looking for Wade, but he hadn't let go of the person in front of him either. He was holding a pair of nicely squared shoulders when something clamped down on his wrists and twisted them away. It hurt a little, but  _oh well._ Peter looked at the person in front of him again, they were blonde. Peter liked blondes, he leaned and kissed the person where their collar-bone should've been. As soon as he had done it he felt a numbing sensation pulse through his face, and everything went topsy-turvy. He fell hard on the floor and he was very very disoriented, and he screamed out for Wade. 

Wade heard Peter's scream and rushed over to the commotion and he did not like what he saw. Peter was sprawled across the rusted warehouse floor, and there was a Captain America standing over him absolutely fuming. His usually pale face was red even in the bad lighting.  _Well at least he's staying within the color scheme_ , was what went through Wade's head. He quickly helped Peter up from the floor.

"My hero," Peter slurred with a dumb bleeding smile on his face. Wade would've cracked up laughing if not for the present situation. Everyone had turned to look at the impending scene, and the music had quieted. 

"Come on Petey, I think it's time we leave," Wade whispered and tried to guide the stumbling hero out of the party. But Peter still had his super-strength and he spun around in Wade's grasp. 

"No, I'm not done yet!" Peter pouted sliding out of Wade's grasp. 

Peter walked towards the center of the circle right towards Steve. "You don't like kissing?" Peter cocked his head, bring his hands up to Steve, who punched him square in the throat. 

Wade was behind Peter in a second, in the most epic trust fall ever. "You dick! Did you have to punch him?" Wade yelled at the American man. 

Peter was thrown into a fit of coughs and Wade sat him down, very unhappy about the bruises on the man's face. 

"What'd you call me?" Steve advanced on Wade who was crouching over Peter. Wade was up and facing down the angry man who was just inches from him.

"I really don't have time for unaliving right now," Wade hissed. 

"Your little pet just kissed me," Steve was fuming, Wade was surprised there was no steam coming out of his ears. 

"He's drunk! Whataya want me to do about it?!" 

"I TOLD YOU YOU WERE A BAD INFLUENCE!" 

Peter had risen from the floor, he wouldn't ever be drunk enough to let Steve Rogers of all people insult his man. "No he's fucking not! YOU JERK!" 

Steve swung at Peter once again, and before he could make contact Wade had caught his fist in midair. 

Oh yeah this was gonna be good. The DJ started slamming beats down, something along the lines of Britney Spears and Jay-Z. 

"Don't let me get into my zone," Wade, or rather Deadpool sneered. 

Steve swung his other fist, contacting Wade's throat, and Deadpool got in one at the hero's ribs, knuckles cracking on contact. 

"Oh I'M DEFINITELY IN MY ZONE" Wade yelled, as the beat dropped. 

There was many swings, and very few contacts. Both ex-soldiers had an air of military grace, only Deadpool's was much more rogue. He itched to take out his switchblade, but remembered where he was: the cheers of the crowd reminding him. Finally Cap was able to knee Wade sending him to the floor, he recovered fast but the fight was interrupted. 

"HEY!" Black Widow was standing between the two, "Get yourselves together!" 

Wade straightened up his suit jacket, and turned back to Peter who was lightly bouncing to the beat. His lip was still bleeding, dripping down his chin and painting outlines on his teeth. There was bruises on his jaw where he'd landed, and neck where he was hit. Wade wiped the blood away with his gloved hands and Peter smiled, his dumb drunk smile. 

Steve had calmed down but was still angry looking. "Don't ever touch me again!" he yelled as Wade and Peter left arm in arm. 

Peter swung his neck around, "YOU KNOW YOU LIKED IT SWEET HEART!" and lifted a finger up.

Wade laughed quietly to himself, and pulled Peter tighter as they walked out. 

Hawkeye caught up to them just as they had gotten to the door, the crowd inside already getting back to the party.

"Hey you don't have to leave, Peter was the life of the party! Steve's the one that needs to leave." 

"Nah, its cool. I think Petey's had enough excitement for one day," Wade said genuinely patting Clint's shoulder.

Clint smiled apologetically and thanked them for coming before rejoining the party. The couple sat on the curb waiting for their black car, Peter nuzzled into Wade. While inside the party was back in full-swing. Steve could be found at the bar, not getting drunk at all. 

"Ugh, you know he kissed me!" Steve complained to the bartender, whose reply was, "I don't know man, he's really good at it." 

Natasha had given Steve a look earlier that conveyed, "You're gonna get it from all of us later." Steve didn't know what was up, there was just something about Deadpool and Peter that he didn't like. 

~

The couple went back to Wade's apartment and Wade carried Peter to the bed. He carefully took off Peter's suit and wiped him down best he could with baby wipes. 

"You had quite a night didn't you," Wade chuckled kissing Peter's knee. Peter placed a hand on the merc's head.

"Mmhmm," Peter hummed his assent. Wade helped Peter into pajamas and tucked him into bed before he went to take a shower.

"Sleep tight baby boy." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just throwing this is out there -> Banner and Stark were both not at the party for a very specific reason ;)


	15. Hangovers and Hangings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post-party feels have both the Spider and the Pool feeling down.

Peter woke up to a splitting headache, his muscles ached and he felt completely exhausted. He opened his eyes but the light coming through the thin blinds was too bright. He groaned and rolled over. Rolled over into Wade who was laying in bed reading a book.

"Good Morning," Wade hummed, laughing at Peter's obvious hangover. Peter's reply was yet another groan, he curled into Wade's side feeling the rough texture layed over the hard muscles underneath. Wade smoothed his hand over Peter's back, and motioned for him to sit up. Peter, slightly annoyed sat up in bed. His brown hair was the definition of bed head. Wade had figured the man would have a terrible hangover after last night, and he had a glass of water and some aspirin ready. He handed them to Peter, and the man greatfully took the pills. He downed the water in one go, only now realizing how dry his mouth was.

"What're you reading?" Peter asked, laying back down. He cuddled into Wade greatful for feeling so taken cared of.

"Eh, it's just a teen romance novel," Wade said non-commitally. He only ever read young-adult contemporary romance books when he needed a distraction. The book he was reading was so completely inconsequential. The plot was based around a love triangle, and the main characters biggest problem was she had to choose between the popular charming jock, and the sweet punk outcast who apparently only she loved. Either option was a good one, and the consequences were so small and insignificant. It was so unlike reality, and Wade was greatful for the fact.

Peter wasn't suprised to find Wade reading, the merc was a lot smarter than people gave him credit for. But something about Wade was definitely off, the usual energetic, bouncy Deadpool had been replaced with a more tired version. Peter wouldn't say anything about it, because maybe it was all in his head. Peter himself wasn't feeling that great so maybe he was just imagining things.

He carelessly rolled over Wade to get off the bed, "I'm going to take a shower, I feel gross." It was true, he felt grimy, his hair was greasy, and his breath was far from minty.

Wade started laughing softly, "Baby boy if you knew what you did last night, you'd be running to that bathroom."

Peter turned around from where he stood, just inches from the bathroom, "WHY? What the hell did I do?"

Wade started laughing louder now, "Oh god, Petey. I'll tell you after you shower."

Peter wanted to know what it was Wade found so funny, but he was too tired to argue so he continued into the bathroom. He stripped off his pajamas, and tried desperately to remember anything about the night before. All he could remember after the shots was bright lights and a buzzing feeling. Peter stepped into the showers, the steaming water relaxing his sore muscles, he washed off all the grime of a drunken night. Realizing with pleasure that Wade had put him into pajamas before bed.

~

Wade was not in the best of moods today. His heart felt like a blackhole, and he feared he might cave in on himself. He almost wished he would. He hadn't slept at all the night before, depression hitting him in waves. The voiceboxes wouldn't stop talking, and their words were mean and aggressive. His skin was burning all over, and he felt completely sick. Wade was usually able to numb his internal strife with sex and suicide. But Wade didn't want to that with Peter around, he wouldn't ever cheat on Peter, he didn't want to. And while Peter was in his apartment, Wade wouldn't kill himself, he didn't want Peter to see him as the mess he was. Peter was so perfect, an angel, the best possible medicine. He couldn't see Wade as the psychotic, suicidal mercenary he was.

[ _You're such a baby! Always complaining! JuST SHUT UP ALREADY!_ ]

{ _Yeah honestly, you're such a loser. You're so annoying!_ }

_i know._

{[ _You should just kill yourself already!_ ]}

_i know._

~

Peter stepped out of the shower, and while brushing his teeth noticed the dark bruises on his jaw and neck. He also noticed the large scab on his lip. _What the hell happened last night?_

He strolled out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped loosely around his waist.

"Hey Wade did we by any chance have a crazy drunken orgy last night?"

Wade chuckled, "I don't kow about we baby boy, but you might've."

Peter turned around from the closet where he was searching for something to wear, eyes wide with shock, "WHAT?!"

Wade smiled, "Ah just kidding Petey! But you did make out with some people, and grind on others."

Peter felt sick at the words that fell from the merc's mouth. _Fuck!_ He had gone and made out with complete strangers at a party Wade had invited him too in the first place. He really was the ultimate jerk. He couldn't believe he would do that to Wade, after everything Wade does for him. Wade takes care of him so well, and Peter's thank you had been to go and get drunk and grind on people?? _What the actual fuck?_

"Oh my god! Wade I'm so sorry... I-You must be so mad. I didn't- It won't happen ever again. I was drunk- I'm so sorry, I-," Peter was stumbling over himself trying to find the right words. He had closed the distance between himself and Wade, and was now kneeling beside the bed, apologizing profusely.

"Woah, woah! Baby boyy," Wade cooed, "Don't be sorry. It was a fun night. I'm not mad at you." Wade really wasn't mad at Peter, he was more so pissed at Rogers for hurting his boyfriend.

Peter calmed down, after Wade had assured him that he wasn't mad, and that he wasn't just being nice. "So how did I get these bruises then?" they definitely weren't hickies, by now Peter knew the difference.

Wade moaned and rolled his eyes, "Ugh! You tried to make out with Captain 'Merica and he was being superr white straight boy about it!"

Peter laughed, "Yikes. Woulda only happened under the influence, yuck!" He was surprised and also unsurprised, of course his drunken self would've made out with Steve Rogers, it was cringeworthy but it happened, and Peter was glad he couldn't remember it. 

~

Peter got dressed, and Wade kept reading his book. Part of Peter had expected Wade to have made breakfast, because he usually made breakfast but Wade seemed down today. Peter could manage to make breakfast by himself, and yeah he would make breakfast for Wade.

"Wanna eat some breakfast?" Peter asked.

"Oh! I didn't make anything. I'm so sorry. I'll make something now if you want. What do you want to eat?" Wade started to get out of the bed, but Peter urged him back down.

"Hey it's okay. I'll make breakfast. What do you want?"

"Uh, no that's okay. I'm not hungry," Wade's reply worried Peter a lot. Wade was literally always hungry, the man could eat a truckload of tacos if he wanted to. But Peter thought it was best not to say anything, not yet anyway.

Peter walked to the kitchen and poured himself some cereal, and ate by himself. It was lonely, and he was worried about Wade, he wanted to so desperately to make him feel better.

~

Once Peter was out of the room, Wade curled in on himself in bed. He wouldn't cry, not with Peter in the next room. He just didn't know what was happening. Actually he knew exactly what was happening, months of bottled up anxiety and depression were coming down on him hard. He just wanted to cry his eyes out, carve his heart out and sleep for the rest of eternity. He wasn't sad for any particular reason, he was just sad. Simply sad, like fucking orange juice. The walls seemed grey, and Wade wanted more than anything to bury himself in grief. He had spent the entire night contemplating life and death, he had spent hours scrolling through depressing tumblr tags. Reading posts about how it'll all turn out alright in the end, but he just couldn't see that right now. He felt like rain at a funeral, he just wanted to die.

[ _God you didn't even make Peter breakfast! You're such a jerk!_ ]

{ _He's gonna leave you as soon as he realizes how fucked up you are._ }

_i know._

~

Peter finished his meager breakfast and walked back into the bedroom. He had another bowl of cereal with him, because he didn't know when Wade had eaten last, and that worried him. Peter was no stranger to dark days, but he knew Wade had been through a shit ton of fuckery that had left scars on the inside too.

He entered the room quietly only to find Wade curled in on himself, dark reflective eyes dripping tears. Wade didn't notice Peter come in, he was trapped in his own world swimming with black puddles of blood. Peter put down the bowl of cereal on the table and moved closer to Wade.

"Hey Wade?" Peter whispered, inching closer with every syllable,"You okay?"

Peter's voice shifted Wade back to reality, he quickly sat up and wiped his tears, "Oh yeah sweety, I'm fine." He tried to smile, but it was broken.

Peter's heart shattered into a million pieces, Wade was always happy, always bubbly and full of energy and jokes. Now he was crying to himself in a dark room. Wade had closed the blinds, casting the room in dull shadowy light, it seemed appropriate for the mood.

Peter got into the bed, and brought Wade into a tight hug. The gesture loosened Wade's walls further, and he was crying desperately into Peter's shoulder. Peter held onto Wade the whole time, smoothing his hand over the merc's back. Wade's sobs were heartbreakingly quiet, but once in a while a loud inhale had Peter hugging him even harder. They held onto each other like life lines. Peter was Wade's lifeline, in this moment when all he could see was grey, Peter was a speck of color.

When Wade had finally cried out all his tears, Peter loosened his embrace, "Do you wanna talk about it?" Peter asked his face inches away from Wade's, staring into those deep dark eyes, and that tear streaked face.

"I just, don't feel so good sometimes... I'm sorry," Wade whispered.

"Noo, baby. You don't need to be sorry. It's okay. Shh," Peter stroked Wade's cheek with his thumb, and layed a soft kiss on his forehead. Peter unfolded himself from Wade, and got up and grabbed the bowl of cereal, it wasn't too soggy yet.

"Here Wade, you have to eat something," Peter smiled gently, holding a spoon up to Wade's chapped lips.

Wade didn't feel like eating, but Peter was adamant so he opened his mouth and let Peter slide the spoon in. Wade ate half the bowl that way, Peter feeding him slowly, because Wade would rather starve himself instead.

Peter was satisfied after Wade had finished half the bowl, and Wade didn't look like he could eat anymore. He set the bowl down, and took Wade's face in his hands. Wade flinched at the touch, and Peter immediately retracted his hands.

"I'm sorry Wade, if you want to be alone-" Peter started to say, but Wade interrupted grabbing Peter's hands with his own, "No, it's not you. I love you. My skin is just not my friend today."

Peter looked down at Wade's hands, rough and red and scarred. Peter bent down and kissed Wade's hands, "I'll be right back, give me five minutes."

With that Peter had gotten up and left, glancing back at Wade to make sure he was okay. Wade was going to be okay, he knew it and Peter knew it. Wade promised himself that he wouldn't do anything drastic while Peter was gone. He had forgot to ask where Peter was going, but he had said that he would come back.

[ _You're an idiot he's never coming back_ ]

{ _He's tired of you, duh._ }

_No, he said he would come back, he will come back._

Anxiety washed over Wade, and he didn't know what to do. What if Peter never came back? What would Wade do then? Wade spent what seemed like forever in a catatonic state of _Peter will come back_ and _He's never coming back_.

~

Peter ran to the nearest pharmacy, and grabbed a basket. He slid down the skin care aisle grabbing everything that made any sense. Lotions of all different scents, brands, for all different skin types, for all different purposes. He grabbed bath salts, and moisturizing soap for sensitive skin. He tossed whatever he could find that would make Wade feel better. He dragged his full basket to the counter and waited impatiently in line, bouncing up and down. Peter didn't want to leave Wade alone for too long, he didn't know what the merc would do. Yeah sure Wade would come back to life no matter what happened, but Peter didn't like the idea of it at all. Peter grabbed a box of chocolates that were on display next to the counter and rushed to get checked out. The total came to seventy five freaking dollars. Peter's wallet was crying, but he didn't give a fuck. Peter payed for it all with no regret. He ran back to Wade's apartment, two plastic bags full of skin care products. He bashed through the front door, and ran back into the bedroom.

~

Peter almost fainted at what he saw. The sheets were stained red, and a knife hung loosely from Wade's bloody hand. His body was sprawled across the bed limply. Wade was dead. Holes in his shirt indicated where he had stabbed himself. His chest was littered with stab wounds that were dripping with blood even though his heart had stopped pumping. _Fuckk jesus christ!_ Tears came to Peter's eyes, he shouldn't have left Wade by himself. Peter gingerly took the knife from Wade's limp hand and tossed it in the to be cleaned box. He then carefully took Wade's shirt off and cleaned the wounds the best he could. He knew they would heal themselves, but it didn't hurt to wipe away the blood or apply some anti-septic. Peter was about to bandage the man, but the wounds were already closing. Peter had gone to run a bath, he had added the bath salts and hopefully it would help Wade's skin. He went back to the bed and just as he was about to lift Wade up, the man gasped back to life. Wade grabbed Peter's wrists and twisted them painfully. When his eyes finally focused back to life, he loosened his grasp and relaxed a bit.

"I- I thought you... I thought you wouldn't come back," Wade whispered, his eyes watering just slightly.

Peter's heart broke yet again. "No, sweety. I'd never do that, never ever. How could I?" Peter whispered hugging Wade careful not to brush his skin too roughly.

"Come on," Peter said, gesturing for Wade to get out of bed. Peter helped him up, he was well-balanced even in his current state. Peter walked Wade over to the bathtub which was full of warm water and bubbles. Wade stripped and got into the tub, the water was invitingly warm, and whatever Peter had put into it had Wade's skin feeling good. The burning sensation was fading ever so slightly, and Wade was glad. Peter sat next to the tub, holding Wade's hand and occasionally pouring water over Wade's head, or scrubbing a particularly patch of skin.

Wade felt so safe in Peter's hands. He didn't know how to describe it. He hadn't felt taken care of in what seemed like forever. He couldn't remember when last someone else had taken care of him. It felt good to have someone care like this. Wade leaned back in the tub and a small, soft smile fell across his lips.

That smile alone was enough to repair Peter's heart in a second, he felt whole again with Wade seeming so content, so much more like his usual smiling self.

"Thank you baby boy," Wade said, looking at Peter with big round eyes. Peter almost melted. He placed a hand on Wade's cheek and kissed him. It was a passionate kiss, one that spoke every unspoken thank you. It was a testament of, "i trust you completely," and "i'll love you forever."

Once the water was cold, Peter helped Wade out of the tub and dried him off. Peter handed the box of chocolates to Wade and left to put new sheets on the blood-stained bed.

Wade smiled, "FOr ME?"

Peter's entire face lit up in that moment, Wade was okay. He was joking around, he was talking again. This was good, this was Wade.

~

Peter had layed the bed with bright new white sheets, and he motioned for Wade to come sit down next to him.

"HolD on Petey. Lemme get dressed first," Wade yelled popping another chocolate into his mouth.

"NOoo Come here! I bought lotion," Peter gestured absurdely.

Wade layed down on the bed, completely naked and feeling out of place. This wasn't sex, this was much much more intimate than that. This was new, and Wade didn't know what to do with himself.

"Hey relax," Peter said sweetly placing a kiss on Wade's neck. Peter looked hesistantly into the bags of lotion, he wasn't sure which one was the best but he eventually settled for a skin relief lotion for sensitive skin with aloe. It had aloe so it must be good, was Peter's reasoning. He would have to do some research on this stuff later. 

Peter moved himself to straddle Wade's hips, the soft material of his sweatpants not uncomfortable against Wade's skin. Peter put a small amount of the lotion onto the tips of his fingers and slowly massaged it into Wade's skin, just near his collarbone. "Is this okay," Peter asked, unsure. 

Wade's reply was a low hum, his eyes were closed and he seemed to be in a better place. Wade _was_ in a better place, the voices were muted and his skin didn't feel terrible at all. Peter was on top of him, which was always a good thing, and the sleep that had evaded him the previous night was slowly coming back to him. Peter kept on putting the lotion on Wade, he slowly worked his way around Wade until he had covered every single patch of skin with lotion. Wade lulled in and out of sleep, his body told him to sleep, but he wanted desperately to stay awake and look at Peter, that cute little smile on his face. 

Wade cocked his head, and was staring with sleepy eyes up at his boyfriend. Peter mirrored Wade, and smiled. He took a drop of lotion and bopped it onto Wade's nose. The cold fluid made Wade scrunch his nose, in what had to be the most adorable Deadpool expression ever. Wade laughed and pulled Peter down to kiss him, smearing lotion all over Peter's cheek. They both laughed out loud, breaking the comfortable silence. 

"God you're just the sweetest dork aren't ya?" Wade said hugging Peter, messing up his already messy hair.

"Agh! And you're the biggest teddy bear mercenary ever!" Peter rebuttled, biting Wade's neck playfully. 

The two men fell into a tumble of hugging and laughing. Wade felt infinitely better, and Peter was happy at the fact. They had both forgotten their incessant headaches, and just revered in the moment. 

Eventually they settled into each other, locked in each others embrace with new sheets tangled around them. They both fell asleep like that and it seemed perfect. Everything else going on in the world was irrelevant. The numerous phone calls on Wade's burners were left unchecked, Peter's homework was forgotten, and saving the city was left to others. Today was just them, saving each other, because that's what mattered the most. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long, I wrote and rewrote and rewrote, and it still isn't the best. I'll make up for it eventually, promise.
> 
> Also THANK YOU so much to everyone who comments, you're what keeps this fic running.


	16. Job Forums

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Deadpool get offered a new job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place a week from the last chapter.

Peter felt something oddly heavy fall on top of him. He was somewhere between dream and reality and there was something sitting on top of him. Peter groaned and he felt who he now realized was Wade kiss him on the nose. 

"Wadeee," Peter groaned, all he wanted to do was sleep some more. 

"Comeee onnn babby boyyy," Wade pecked Peter's lips, "You're gonna be late for work."

Peter shot up, almost knocking himself into Wade if not for both of their immensely fast reflexes. Peter glanced at the clock, it was 4:50 and it was Monday. "Jesus SHIT!" Peter jumped out of bed onto the cieling and crawled to the bathroom. Work started at five, Jameson would not be happy if he was late, then class at econ at 1:15, then photography at 4:00, after that was Journalism at 5:00, and back to back to back until finally Wade at 9:00, the best part of the day. 

Peter was furiously brushing his teeth and Wade casually strolled into the bathroom and wrapped his arms around Peter, "Good morning."  Peter mumbled back a good morning through his toothpaste filled mouth. Wade kissed Peter's neck and while Peter was worrying about a thousand different things he always loved when Wade would do this. It was efficient if anything. You could get nice Wade cuddly time, and get ready for work at the same time. Peter finished brushing his teeth, and combed a hand through his hair. No matter what he did it looked messy so he didn't bother anymore. Wade the sweetheart that he was had set up Peter's clothes on the bed. A fitted suit and a periwinkle tie. 

"Ah you're the best Wade," Peter said kissing the merc, and then hurrying to get his clothes on. "Love you too baby boy," Wade said as he fixed Peter's tie. The clock blinked 4:58. Peter would surely be late, but at least just a few minutes. Peter rushed out the door with Wade handing him a to go mug of coffee and a brown paper bag which undoubtedly had both breakfast and lunch stuffed into it. "See ya sweetheart," Peter said and kissed Wade one last time as he rushed out the door to get to work. 

Wade chuckled, Peter was such an adorable little bouncy ball. Wade hated when Peter went to work and class, because he was so far away. And also Wade knew that Peter hated working for Jameson, but the conversation had gone something like this....

"Peteyy, you don't have to work. I'll pay for everything."

"Wade, that's really sweet but I can't ask you for that."

"No Peterr, you don't understand. I'm richer than Warren Buffet. It's crazy. Bloomberg wants to suck me off."

"Wadee. Let me be an independent woman, please."

"FINEE! Beyonce, do what you want." 

Wade had tried multiple times, but Peter was a stubborn little spider. If anything Wade lightened Peter's load by paying for all the food, and stuff for both their apartments. While they basically lived together, they both still had their own apartments and their nights together wound up in which ever house was closer. 

Wade sat on the couch with a stack of pancakes and a mound of maple syrup and started watching Golden Girls.  _Good morning Bea!_ The voices and him were having a nice morning talking about all the wonderful plot lines of Golden Girls, and maybe fantasizing just a little about Spider-man's ass. He had just finished his pancakes when one of his burner's rang. He picked it up, "YELLO! IT's your friendly NEighbourhood. MERC WITH THE MOUTH!" 

The guy on the other lines voice was computer generated,  _this guy has IDENTITY ISSUESSS!_ The voice gave him an address in motherfuckin' jersey. So Wade put on his suit, packed a duffel bag full of extra guns, ammo, and bombs. The voice hadn't described the mission, so Wade took almost everything. He was out the door, he had texted Dopinder and was assured that he was on the way. Wade sat on the curb humming Desiigner's Tiimmy Turner, and he called Peter's work phone, so it was official. 

"HII CHIMICHANGA!" Wade squealed when Peter picked up.

"Hiya Wade," Peter was using the typical quiet work voice. 

"Soo babyy, I got called to a job, so I'm heading to Jersey." 

"Wadee, what kind of job?"

"Ah Baby boy, I don't really know yet. But I promise I'll only unalive if they're assholes."

"Give them two chances DP," Peter's voice was concerned and serious. Wade knew Peter wasn't a fan of deadly deadpool, but a girl's gotta eat. 

"PInky PRomise, ma lover, CYA on the flipsideee,"

"Cya Wade, be careful, and text me!" Peter's concern for Wade's safety would never fail to melt Wade's heart. 

They hung up, and Dopinder pulled up. "WElL hELLO There!" Wade said, his voice sliding seamlessly between pitches. 

"Hello Mr. Pool, where to?" 

"ONWARD! To JERSEY! The state of club music!" 

And with that they were soon on the Turnpike heading south, eventually they got to a weird military base in Edison. Wade handed Dopinder a wad of cash and he stepped out of the taxi. After Dopinder drove away Wade decided the best way to do this would be to jump the fence. So he ran at the fence and flipped over the barbed wire. A++ for form. As soon as he landed on the other side there was a team of camoflauge clad soldiers pointing guns at him from a distance. 

"AH FLOATING GUNS!! Where are the people??!"  _haha get it, camaflouge._

Then out of the small army strolled none other than a Shield agent.  _Oh goodie! I love corrupt governments!_ The woman strolled over to him, and offered a hand.

"Glad you got the message Deadpool, come on in." 

They walked him through beige hallways that seemed to stretch on forever. Wade took the chance to text Peter.

 **WADE:** In JErsey! Smelling the roses in the Garden State. 

 **PETER:** Bring me some orchids <3

Wade smiled under his mask, he would try his hardest to get home by nine to meet Peter. Eventually the squad of heavily armed soldiers, the shield agent, and Deadpool got to a pair of matching metal doors. They were opened and Wade walked in.

~

Peter was sitting at his desk at work sorting through numerous pictures from multiple photographers. He was just about to send an email to all of the photographers asking for certain pictures for some articles that needed a picture because they were pretty boring otherwise. Just as he pressed send a familiar voice whispered, "Hi" in his ear. 

Peter spun around to see that familiar red hair. "OH MY GOD!" Peter yelled, "MJ?!!!" He sprung up from his chair and hugged the woman. He hadn't seen her in a whole year, this was absolutely insane.

MJ laughed and hugged him back, "Good to see you too Peter." 

"What the hell are you doing back in Queens MJ?" Peter asked grabbing a chair for her. They both sat down at Peter's desk, they were being pretty loud and the others had noticed but Peter didn't care. His best friend had come back. 

"I actually just got back. I got a job here, and I'm gonna finish up school at NYU." 

"WHAT?? That's greatt. Wow. I'm so glad you're back." 

They did a lot of catching up, everything from exes to college classes, clearance sales and current events. They laughed a lot, and Peter was super happy to see this familiar face again.  _Had it really been a year_ _?_ It wasn't like there wasn't anything super new about it, they texted every single day and skyped all the time. MJ was one of the few people who knew absolutely everything about Peter. She knew about Spider-man, she knew about Wade, and she knew basically everything else.

"Here let's send a snap to Wade, he'll be really jealous," Peter joked and pulled out his phone. They posed with MJ kissing Peter on the cheek, and captioned it, "Stealing your man." 

"He's gonna kill me," MJ laughed, she'd met masked Wade on Skype and he had seemed like a cool guy.

"Nah, he's just a giant teddy bear with abs." 

They talked and talked, Peter worked but MJ was there the whole time and pretty soon it was twelve and time for Peter's lunch break. 

"Hey, so you wanna see where I work?" MJ asked basically bouncing up and down. She dragged Peter out of the Daily Bugle and they took a cab to Stark Towers. 

"You work here?" Peter asked staring up uncertain at the big building. Stark Towers was just a few blocks away from Avengers Tower and it made Peter uncomfortable, he really did not want to run into Captain America.

Either way Mary Jane dragged him through the doors, and flashing her employee ID at multiple monitors took Peter up to the fourth floor. "This is my office," she gestured at an open space with green chairs and oddly shaped desks. There was computers and a bunch of other stark tech. 

"I'm the newest media consultant for Stark Enterprises!" MJ squealed with joy and fell into one of the green couches. Peter sat down next to her, "WOW! This is really great MJ I'm so happy for you." 

MJ showed Peter all around her new office, showed him all the cool tech, and the snack bar. They split the sandwich Wade had made for Peter and MJ marveled at how good a cook Wade was. They were fooling around when the sand blasted doors opened and in came Tony motherfuckin' Stark and Pepper extra olives Potts. Tony didn't even notice them and was pointing at different corners of the office and telling Pepper things about infrastructure and energy renewal. Then Tony noticed Peter and MJ and was quieted for just a moment. 

"Hiya Mr. Stark," MJ said mock saluting at her new boss. Peter would never get over how confident this girl was. Peter on the other hand was trying to make himself invisible. Tony however glared at him, obviously recognizing him as none other than Spider-man. Pepper smiled at both of them and walked over to shake both their hands.

"You're our new media consultant right?" Pepper asked MJ, who smiled and nodded.

"God knows we need you, with this one," Pepper said gesturing at Tony, who chuckled. 

An awkward silence fell between the group and Pepper noticing Tony staring at the man with the new media consultant, asked MJ to join her so they could talk about an interview with Forbes magazine. MJ patted Peter's shoulder before she jumped up and followed Pepper. 

Peter and Tony were left alone together. "So, umm- I was just gonna go..." Peter said awkwardly getting off the couch. 

"I heard you had quite a night at Barton's party," Tony said.  _Jesus, of all the things Tony could bring up, it was this?!_

"Uh, yeah I don't really remember much," Peter said using all his strength not to dash out of the room. Tony started laughing though, and tension eased a little.

"That's good. Steve has just really been an asshole recently," Tony said patting Peter's shoulder, "You know what would really piss him off?" 

Peter looked at Tony with a confused look on his face, "Umm... no?" 

"If you worked here!" Tony said, "You're a photographer right? Well, you could work here."

"Are you offering me a job?" Peter was beyond confused by now.

"Sure! I'll double whatever you're making right now," Tony said holding onto Peter's shoulders.  _This is really weird._

"Um, I make ten bucks an hour," Peter said, really really uncomfortable with Tony grabbing his shoulders.

"Damn. Well yeah double isn't much is it?" Tony looked unsure now, "How about 20 bucks an hour for now, and then raises as we go, yeah? Benefits and all." 

"Okay." Peter had no idea why he said okay.  _WHAT THE HELL!_ Peter said okay to a job offer from Tony Stark for double his wage, with benefits as a photographer. Wasn't this a dream, but oh shit why was he doing this. He didn't even know what the catch was,  _jesus christ._ Tony was already celebrating his small victory and said something about I'll text you the details and he was gone. 

Peter checked the time, it was one, and Peter needed to get to class. He texted MJ and told her he was leaving, and then he texted Wade and told him he wanted an entire bouquet of orchids, even though those didn't exist. 

Peter went to class and contemplated his life choices while his professor assigned yet more homework.

~

"YOU WANT ME TO WHAT?!" Wade yelled, knocking over a chair.

The idiot Government Board Member in front of him had just said the dumbest thing ever. 

"You heard me Deadpool. It should be easy considering your close relationship with him," the woman's cold voice was like nails on a chalkboard in Wade's head.

"Yeah, sweety. Not gonna happen," Deadpool crossed his arms.

"You don't understand Mr. Wilson. If you don't do it, someone else will," her matter of fact attitude was really irksome.

"Like hell they will," Deadpool said, planning a thousand different ways to kill the woman in front of him.

"If he doesn't die, then the future will be a very bad place indeed. Mr. Wilson you're known for taking any job, that is why we contacted you."

"NOT TRUE! I don't kill kids, I don't kill innocents, and I sure as fuck won't kill him. Sorry sweetheart." 

"Sorry to hear that Mr. Wilson, we were offering a very good price. Now we'll have to put him out for a price." 

"NO! Leave him off the forums." 

"Mr. Wilson, if you won't kill him, I have no choice but to put him out."

"DAMMIT! FINE! I'll do it."

"You have a month Mr. Wilson," the woman handed him a brief case full of money, "The other half when we get the body." 

Wade growled and grabbed the briefcase. He threw a knife at the woman, it landed just left of her neck, "Keep him off the forums." 

The woman smiled, "Will do Mr. Wilson." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this. MJ will become a regular character, and we'll see how Wade handles his latest target in the next chapter.


	17. Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade doesn't know what to do about his newest job offer, and Peter knows exactly what to do with his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This entire chapter is just angst. So brace yourself.

It was quiet. The voices were dead. Wade was dead. His heart was beating silently, his lungs expanding silently. There was no sound. Wade couldn't hear anything. It was utterly silent when he boarded the train from Edison back to the city. It was quiet as Wade silently passed through the web of lives that was the city. It was silent when he unlocked the door to his apartment, and it was silent as he sat on the white couch. 

~

Peter had just finished his last class and had texted Wade who had not replied. Peter didn't think much of it as he fumbled with the keys to Wade's apartment. Wade was busy and working, Peter didn't expect him to reply to a text message when he was gunning down people, or throwing bombs, and being the sexy mercenary he was.

Peter was in an uncharacteristically good mood today. He had spent a good portion of the day with a physical MJ, which was absolutely fantastic, and he had been offered a good job with higher pay, and a better environment. Peter had thought over the offer and he planned on accepting it, he just wanted to hear Wade's opinion first, although he was sure the merc would be supportive.

Peter opened the door and pushed his way into Wade's apartment. Wade was sitting on the couch staring at a black tv screen. There was no beer, no music, no Golden Girls, there was nothing but a Deadpool starkly contrasting his red suit against a white couch, and a black briefcase on the steel coffee table.

"Hey baby," Peter said, hoping Wade was simply talking to the voiceboxes or something like that. Wade barely heard Peter, barely saw him even. He had run through a million scenarios in his head. He had decided that suicide would only make the situation worse, it wasn't his life hanging in the balance anymore, now it was Peter. Wade had considered tearing apart the entire galaxy, and figured that was plan z. Wade was not adept at making plans, he didn't have the patience for a script. That had all changed in the mere hours he had sat on a crowded rush hour train. Wade Wilson had plans a through z all planned out, down to the very last detail. He had considered every possible option, every possible variable, and found he didn't have any idea what to do.

"Wade...?" Peter's face contorted into concern in front of Wade's still masked face. Wade couldn't bring himself to answer, everything was quiet. Peter's hands found the clasps of Wade's mask and soon the fabric was no longer hiding his broken features. Peter's heart stopped beating at the shattered look in Wade's reflective eyes. "Wade?" Peter's voice was one of panic now as his soft hands cupped Wade's face and the lithe man dropped to his knees studying Wade with fierce intensity. "Wade? Talk to me Wade."

He had a month, four weeks, twenty eight days, six hundred and seventy two hours, forty thousand three hundred and twenty minutes, two million thousand something ticking seconds to figure this shit out. 

Wade looked at Peter for what felt like the first and the last time, and every moment he'd spent with this amazing man was flashing through his head and _he knew_ , he knew that he would go to the ends of the multiverse if only to protect this one man. 

"Hiya babe," Wade's voice betrayed nothing, there was no emotion that even remotely hinted at what Wade was supposed to do, what he would do. 

Peter's features changed but only slightly, he was still worried, "Are you okay?" 

"Oh yeah baby I'm muy bueno. Sorry, I was having a really intense conversation with the voices about the Kama Sutra." 

Peter raised his eyebrows and cocked his head, "The Kama Sutra? Like the Sanscrit sex book?"

Wade puckered his lips, he would fake it all if only for Peter's sake, "What else baby boy?! That book is the shitt."

Peter got off the floor, this was the normal Wade, this Wade was good. Peter slinked into the bedroom and came back out in a loose t-shirt and sweats, he hated being in work clothes for too long. "So guess what sweety? It's probably the best news ever!" 

"Is it MJ? Cause I got your snap, and I'm willing to fight her for you," Wade would fight everyone for Peter. 

Peter laughed, "Yes, that's part of it. But I got a job offer! From TONY STARK!" Peter's voice was full of excitement, the man practically glowed with enthusiasm. This is what Wade was going to protect, even if the rest of time and space fell apart. 

"WoAH! That's great baby, just make sure he pays you good." 

Peter rambled on about his day, on how great it was, on how he would be making double the money. Wade listened to all of it, he was staring at Peter, at the way his tongue formed his words, at how his breath and his throat made the sweet sound of his voice, at how his muscles shifted when he moved, at how the light caught in his hair, and how his smile made the entire room light up. Wade was memorizing everything he could about Peter, because he knew that there was going to be an end. 

Peter was absolutely elated, his day was going great, and now there was Wade being utterly and inexhaustibly sweet and listening to him ramble over it. Maybe it was the oxytocin but Peter wanted nothing more than to celebrate the victories of this too short day with Wade. 

"So how was your day?" Peter asked, poking Wade playfully in the ribs. Wade leaned back into the couch, there was so many damn adjectives to choose from.

"It was alright. The usual merc stuff, I didn't unalive anyone, but I did throw a knife," it wasn't a lie, it wasn't the truth, but it wasn't a lie either. 

Peter was satisfied with Wade's answer, it seemed like a good day for both of them then. The hand that had poked Wade was now flat against the man's abs, running slowly up and down the hard muscles underneath the suit. Peter lightly kissed Wade's neck, and swung himself over so he could stradle Wade's hips. He moved his hands to cup the mercenary's face and kissed Wade on the lips. Peter didn't realize that Wade's eyes were wide open as he deepened the kiss. 

Peter ground down on Wade, "Why don't you show me everything you know about the Kama Sutra huh?" Wade willed himself to get into it, sex shouldn't be so difficult. It was Peter, it was sex, the two loves of Wade's life, and sex with Peter should've trumped it all, but everything was quiet. There was no roar of lust pulsing through Wade's veins, there was no want, or desperate pleas. 

"Maybe another time Peter," was all Wade could say to the quickly hardening man who he had desperately fallen in love with. It was a cruel joke, "another time", what other time would there be. Wade couldn't see the future, he didn't want to, but by God he knew that another time was as far away as the next century.  

Peter was brought up short.  _"Another time?!"_ what kind of sick joke was that? Wade Wilson didn't want to have sex with him? This was something for the history books.

"Wade?" Peter's eyes were full of confusion and hurt as he slid of the merc to the opposite couch. Peter would give Wade space, but this was not normal. Wade couldn't bring himself to look Peter in the eyes, somehow sex at this moment felt like a betrayal. How could he have sex with Peter when he was supposed to kill him? How could he lie to Peter and then take him to bed? He couldn't. 

"I'm sorry Peter." 

 _Peter._ Wade never called Peter by his name, it was always something else,  _"baby boy" , "Petey-pie", "spidey"._ Something was wrong. "What's wrong Wade? You can tell me." 

Wade didn't look at Peter he was staring at nothing in particular, "It's nothing." 

"Nothing?!" Peter was angry now,  _nothing_ , that was the stupidest thing he'd ever heard. How could it be nothing? "Wade, just tell me. I won't be offended. It's okay, I just want to know if you're alright." 

Wade didn't know what he was doing, didn't know where this was going, but he was overwhelmed. He wanted to shred apart the world, he wanted to reverse time so that he was never born. "It's  _nothing_ Peter," the words came out harsher than he had meant. 

Peter ubruptly stood up, he was in a limbo between running home and crying at the cruel way the words had come out of Wade's mouth, and at embracing the scarred man who was so obviously sick. "Wade..."

"Peter. Just stop. I can't. I can't do it," the words were stumbling out Wade's mouth before he could stop them. He didn't know where this was going, he hadn't accounted for this variable, he didn't know.

"Wade, what are you trying to say?" Peter crossed his arms, and pursed his lips. Wade looked up at Peter, he kept his body as still as possible. He thought he might never get up from this couch. Wade's eyes locked with Peter's, "I can't," was all that came out. It was a desperate cry for help, it was a shout to the orders he had, it was a rebellion and a submission all at once. 

"Are you breaking up with me Wade?" Peter's voice cracked, he hadn't thought he would ever have to say that sentence, had never in dreamt it even in his worst nightmares.

Wade only nodded his head once, staring straight at Peter but seeing absolutely nothing.  _Why did he nod? WHY?_ but the answer never came. Peter stood a moment longer before he went to the door, his work bag slung over his shoulder, "Why?" Peter whispered, asking, pleading with Wade to rethink, to atleast explain, to say the words himself.

Wade said nothing, there was silence. Tears streamed down Peter's face and Wade could hear them coating that sweet voice made solely of vibrations. Wade looked at Peter standing at the door, hand on the knob hoping that he wouldn't have to turn it. 

"It's over," Wade whispered and tears gushed out of his traitorous eyes, but his voice was hard and definite. A cut through the silence that had engulfed them both. Peter turned the knob and walked out, the door clicked shut. Wade was alone. Peter was alone. There was nothing, there was silence. A cruel, cold silence. A silence manufactured in the deepest depths of the universe, a silence that would not be broken. 


	18. Sweet Deaths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade gets to work. Peter gets drunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the fourth part Wade is singing "Here Comes the Boom" by Nelly

Peter had gone home that day in a daze. This wasn't how the story was supposed to go, he needed atleast a reason. Peter was so sure Wade had one too. It didn't matter though. Peter didn't give a shit. If it was over, it was over, the fucking end. Peter had spent enough time in bad relationships, had experienced enough ends to not give a fuck. Somewhere deep down inside of him he was shattered, absolutely broken and crying, but not on the surface. Peter was strong, he didn't need anyone else. 

Peter had invited MJ over for the night and the red head had shown up with a pillow and a flashy smile. Peter had told MJ everything about his crappy breakup with Wade, he had cried on MJ's shoulder and afterwords he had felt better. All of Wade's stuff that was around his apartment had been thrown out, Peter really didn't have time to be emotionally broken. He was young, and opportunity was knocking on his door practically begging him to come out into the world. He had called Stark and accepted the job offer and then promptly quit his job at the Bugle. MJ and him spent the night watching chick flicks and throwing popcorn at each other. 

"Hey Peter, we should go clubbing!" MJ squealed as she hit Peter with a pillow. 

Peter took the hit right in the face and swung at MJ's legs with his own feathery weapon, "YES AND GET RIP-ROARING DRUNK!" 

They both fell to the floor laughing and panting, it was a very nostalgic moment, and Peter could think of nothing else he'd rather be doing. 

~

Wade spent some hours on the couch, clenching and unclenching his fists. Biting his lips, leaning back, sitting up. Tears drenched the collar of his suit, what had he done? He loved Peter, fuck labels. If Peter would be safer without Wade then so be it, he didn't care. What he did care about though was the fact that his baby boy was being threatened. That was not okay. That would  _never_ be okay. 

The mercenary ubruptly stood up from the couch. He found his mask and pulled it on, loaded himself with as much ammo as he could possibly hold and took to the streets. The first order of business was the forums. The dark web was full of trash, but the most useful thing on it was the forums. If you put Reddit on a shitload of drugs, sent it to an intergalactic prison, gave it an abusive family, and added a generous side of crazy it would be the forums. These short threads were known to any assassin, mercenary, criminal who was worth anything it all. This was the big leagues. Crazy people from all corners of the galaxy were on it, all you had to do was name your price and soon enough you'd get what you wanted. Deadpool had used the thing enough times to find his next job opportunity to know the reality of having your name next to a price tag. If Peter got on the forums there would be an entire galaxy full of filth out for him, and that would not do. 

Wade went to a small library and sat down at one of the computers. He was fully clad in his Deadpool costume and was scaring the shit out of the people in his vicinity. He used the computer and scanned quickly through the forums, he never opened the dark web on his own computer or on his own network, it was too risky. He quickly found the top names on the forums. The people who answered for a price, among them were mafia, secret government organizations, hate groups, lone assassins, and mercenaries of all types. Wade would kill them all. 

~

Peter stepped into the glowing mass that was the night club MJ had picked. They were arm in arm and ready to drink themselves to the death.

"I LOVE THIS SONG!" MJ screamed as she pulled Peter onto the dance floor. The music was one mass of loud vibrations that you could barely hear but you could definitely feel. Peter fell into step beside MJ and they danced until their mouths were dry and their feet were sore. They pushed their way out of the the large crowd and headed for the bar. They fell onto the bar stools and ordered spiked cokes.

"Ooh damn. Look at that guy," MJ was pointing to a tanned muscular man dancing not far from the bar.

Peter leaned back and took a sip of his drink, "He is pretty cute." Part of Peter thought about Wade, how gorgeous he was, but Peter shook his head. It was over, and that was that. There wasn't going to be any melodramatic crying about it. "You should go dance with him MJ."

Mary Jane turned to Peter and pecked him on the cheek, "He's not as cute as you." 

"You're a relentless flirt!"

"I am a relentless truth teller," and with that Mary Jane Watson was dragging Peter back to the dance floor.

~

Wade had started with an underground circle that ran itself from Hell's Kitchen. Wade hadn't bothered to ask Matty for help but he would inform him later. Deadpool found himself at a dock where a bunch of baddies in black were hauling crates from one oversized shipping container to the next. 

Deadpool pointed a gun at a man on the dock who froze but fumbled for his own gun, "Ya think of jumpin man, you best think again!" Deadpool shot the man in the face.

Another man now stood in front of him, "Lil dirty, I'm the type of man that might could go for revenge!" Deadpool was singing while he shot the man in the chest, it was obvious he wasn't wearing a bullet vest. Some other men came up behind him, "Have some not so nice friends," another shot, "kick the door off the hinge," another shot. 

There was four men down, and now four more showed up guns raised, "Take the door of ya Benz, p-p-pop 4 of your friends!" All four of them were dead on the ground before they could even think to pull their triggers. These people were threatening Peter, they would die. 

"This here ain't cynical,

mental,

subliminal,

I'm physical,

financial,

and mENTaL(!)

to be a general!"

More bullets more death, less threat. Deadpool spun around on his heel, surveying the docks making sure every single person he had shot was truly dead. A large man with a very sexy machine gun came up behind him, this was who he had come for. This guy was at the top of the forums, nameless, completely anonymous, and a kick-ass ninja. He was the best of the best when it came to cold killings (second-best when it came to Deadpool). "HERE COMES THE  ** _BOOM_** ** _!_** " Wade yelled as a bomb he had set up before clicked down to the last second. A fiery explosion and the anonymous hunter was dead along with all his men. That was one down, a million more to go. 

Wade took out his Hello Kitty flip and dialed Daredevil. A few rings and a, "Hello?" 

"Hiya Matty-boy my favorite avocado!" 

"Wade? What are you doing?" 

"Ohh I just thought I'd let you knoww that... I might've just killed the anon hunter and he's now in bits and pieces on your dock." 

"Deadpool, what the hell?" 

"OOOOHHH! DON'T CURSE!! God doesn't like that kind of shit Matty. The END BYEE!" 

He hung up before Murdock could ask anymore questions. 

~

MJ and Peter were spinning from the alcohol and the bright lights. They were swimming in EDM and for once Peter felt absolutely normal. Here he was with a beautiful girl, his best friend, at a night club, after a long day. This was normal, this was good, this was fun! 

They danced and danced, laughing and smiling, flirting and drinking as much as their wallets could bear. 

~

Wade took out a few more people from his list, they were easy small criminals that spent a little too much time on the forums for Wade's liking. He headed back to Queens and on his way to his own apartment he passed Peter's. It wans't on purpose, or maybe something in his subconcious had made him do it. The voices still weren't back yet. 

Wade stared up into the windows that were Peter's, the lights weren't on. It wasn't that late, where was Peter. He couldn't possibly be asleep?! IS HE OKAY?! Wade's heart started beating faster and faster, his breathing heavy and ragged. 

"GOD WaDE! You can't go into his hoUSE! THAT's CREEEPPPYYYY!" Wade was talking to himself.

"BUT WHAT IF HE's HURT!!!" 

"HE's soo capable, he can handle himself."

"THat doesn't mean YOU SHOULDN't HELP HIM!"

Wade scaled the building and opened Peter's window. He stepped into the apartment and found pillows on the floor and popcorn everywhere. There was no sign of struggle though, nothing unordinary. It seemed that MJ was sleeping over. Wade couldn't help himself though, he needed to make sure Peter was safe. He bugged the entire apartment, only sound in the bedroom and nothing in the bathroom, but the rest of the place was fully equipped with audio and visual. He knew it was crossing a line, he knew that it was a gross invasion of privacy but he needed to make sure Peter was safe. 

Wade opened the drawer of Peter's desk to wire another mic but what he found inside drew him up short. A rectangular box was wrapped in glittery red and black wrapping paper. "To: Wade" scrawled in glitter glue across the front. Wade's hands reached toward the gift but withdrew, it wasn't for him anymore. Wade slowly closed the drawers, tears threatening to fall from his traitorous eyes. He climbed out of the window and ran back to his apartment. 

~

Wade quickly doned a large sweater and some cargo pants, he looked civilian enough if no one saw his masked face. He had hacked Peter's phone and tracked him to a local nightclub. Of course the web head was at a night club, where else would the party spider be. Part of Wade was screaming in agony at the thought that he couldn't kiss Peter, that he couldn't embrace him and hold him and whisper wild innuendos in his ear, another part of Wade thought this was good, at least now Peter would be safe from Wade. 

The hooded Wade entered the nightclub, his eyes were instantly drawn to Peter, glowing among the epileptic lights. _Peter was gravity_ in moments like this, everyone swirled and spun around him, he was dancing, smiling, most importantly he was okay. That's all Wade wanted, that's all Wade needed. 

There was a moment where Peter looked straight at Wade.

~

Among the lights and the thrashing bodies Peter could've sworn...

There was a moment where he could've sworn that he saw Deadpool watching him.

Peter willed his buzz to push it away, of course it was just a weird hallucination.

~

Wade knew that Peter saw nothing, he was looking right at him and he saw absolutely nothing. It broke Wade's heart, but he was happy, Peter was safe, he was with MJ, he was happy. That's all that mattered. 

Wade kept a safe distance from Peter the whole night, and made sure he made it all the way to his apartment safe.

The drunken remains of Peter and MJ didn't think it was strange that there was a cab waiting for them, they didn't find it weird that the driver didn't charge them. They didn't notice the second figure in the passenger seat, they laughed and giggled and snorted adorably all the way home, not a care in the world. 

"Ignorance really is bliss huh Dopi."

"It sure is Mr. Pool." 

~

Peter and MJ crashed through the apartment door, stumbling over each other and roaring with laughter at absolutely nothing. MJ was a happy drunk that laughed at everything and her laugh was so absolutely addictive that no one could help but laugh along with her no matter what, and Peter was no exception. 

They fell on the blankets laid out all across the floor and fell asleep once the giggling had died down, tonight was a good night. The day overall had been good, if not for the slight bump that was Wade.

"Sweet Dreams Parker."

"Sweet Dreams Watson."

~

Wade filled up on some more ammo and went out again, he wouldn't stop until he had everyone on the forum six feet under. Or seven just to be sure. There was only one way this would end.

Deadpool found himself reclining in the super extra sized chair of the Kingpin. The bulky bald man strolled in the lights turning on and the mob boss' face betrayed only the slightest bit of surprise. 

"Hiya bitch," and Wade shot a bullet towards the man's enormous (weirdly small compared to the rest of him) head. A splatter of red blood and the shell of a bullet on the floor. Wade unfolded his legs from where they were resting on the desk and walked out of the building. Just a few more now.

 


	19. Orchid Bouquet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Break ups are hard, especially when you have to beat up your ex for stalking you. Such is the life of Peter as he steps all over Wade's very broken heart.

Three weeks had passed and Wade had successfully taken out some of the galaxy's top killers, and while part of him cheered at the reduced threat toward Petey-pie the rest of him was counting down to next week when Peter's name would undoubtedly make its way onto the forums. Wade had perused the code and talked to every single hacker worth the time and none of them, not even collectively could bring down the site or even wanted to. Even if Wade did try to bring down the forums itself it wouldn't do much good, because there were murderers before the internet and there would be murderers after the internet as well. 

Wade hadn't slept since the night they had broken up. He was on the verge of a mental breakdown (he was always on the verge but more than usual) and he was so twitchy he had shot a hole through his microwave after he had dozed off a little with his ramen cooking. Every single noise he heard at this point was a possible threat and he was sleeping in minutes and he had drunk so many espresso shots he was amazed that his body hadn't developed an immunity yet. 

Whenever Peter went to class or work, Wade used the time to wire the city. He had placed bombs practically everywhere, and it all came up to a four digit pin and a button on a small original iPod sized device which was now resting in Wade's forearm where he had carved a hole and buried it underneath his skin. 

~

Currently Peter's life was going better than ever. His new job was fantastic! Being a photographer for Stark Industries was more work than it sounded like, Peter was supposed to take pictures of new tech for magazines and catalogues, and he was supposed to take detailed spec pictures for the companies internal database. Peter was happy to do the work, and he didn't have to take any pictures of Tony which was an absolute blessing. The environment of the Stark Office Building was a nerd's heaven, it was like Google except it was a hundred times more techy, and it gave Peter the perfect opportunity to work on his personal photography because everything in this place was abstract and an artistic heaven. 

The perks of the job included a stark pad, unlimited access to a giant snack bar, full insurance,  _and_ Stark had a program where he helped pay for college tuition, so basically Peter had his dream job, was getting fat off it, and had a lot less student debt to worry about,  _and_ MJ was just down the hall. Peter's civilian life was absolutely a dream, and he hoped it never changed. 

Not to mention that Spiderman was having a pretty good life at the moment too. Crime was unbelievably low in the city and Spidey had realligned himself with the Avengers. While he still didn't much like Cap, Tony and him were tag teaming him to no end, and the rest of the Avengers were being very supportive of him. He was getting new training, and Peter's absence from the Bugle meant that the newspaper had few good pictures of him which meant less crap from the media. 

The only thing that hadn't been so good about the past few weeks was Aunt May's dissappointment at the news of Peter and Wade's breakup. 

" _Peter dear you really should invite Wade over for dinner here soon."_

_"Uhmm... Aunt May. We broke up."_

_"WHAT?! OH NO Peter dear I am sorry. What happened?"_

_"He broke up with me, it's no big deal really. It's fine. I'm okay."_

_"Hmm. Well if you want to talk about it, you can always tell your old Aunt."_

_"Thanks Aunt May."_

_"Out of curiosity though, should I go beat him with my purse?"_

~

Peter was walking to class, and Wade was following a few yards away. This was what had been doing for the past three weeks, stalking Peter like a freak and he knew it was a gross invasion, but he couldn't help it, he needed to make sure Peter was safe. That's what Wade kept telling himself, although part of him was starting to doubt it, part of him knew that he was stalking Peter because he was obsessed not with the man's safety but with the man himself and Wade wanted to throw up everytime he thought like that. 

One time Peter strolled into his living room without a shirt and Wade who had been monitoring his feeds had thought about how it would feel to kiss Peter and Wade had immediately slammed his laptop shut and promptly wretched himself weak in the bathroom. He would protect Peter professionally, there was  _nothing_ else.

Peter casually strolled towards his destination but he slowed when he saw a florist's shop. Nostalgia slammed through him, and for what might've been the first time he missed Wade. Peter remembered the texts he had sent Wade just a few hours before their breakup, " _I want an entire bouquet of orchids Wade Wilson."_ As if the world was a fan of cruel irony the store front was literred in potted orchids "FOR SALE". 

Wade slammed on his breaks as Peter stopped in front of the flower shop. Memory slammed into him as he realized he had forgotten the orchids. He hadn't even replied to the damn text.  _FUCK!_ Wade started crying. He was sleep deprived, and emotionally wrecked and now he was standing just a few yards away from who he knew was the love of his life and  _dammit! I FORGOT THE FUCKING ORCHIDS!_  

Peter looked at the pretty purple and white flowers with their wooden stems, they were stupidly expensive flowers and a bouquet of them wouldn't have made any sense. But Peter knew Wade would've done it, if not for the timing. If Peter had asked Wade for a bouquet of orchids just a day earlier the man would've done it, no matter how ridiculously hard it would've been. Peter's heart cringed and he felt he might cry but he tore his gaze from the flowers and continued walking, a little faster than normal.  _GET OVER IT PARKER! IT'S DONE!_

Wade followed, tears soaking the inside of his mask which was well covered under a baseball hat and a hoodie. He wanted so badly to reach out for Peter who was so agonizingly close, he wanted to stop Peter in the middle of the street and fall to his knees and apologize for forgetting the orchids and for not explaining and for being a general dick. In fact before he even realized what he was doing-

Peter's spidey-sense went off like an alarm and he spun around, Deadpool was behind him a hand extended. "WADE?! WHAT THE HELL?!" Peter screamed his face contorting into disgust and contempt. Wade was found completely off-guard, he didn't know if this was a hallucination or if he was just dreaming it, everything was blurry at this point. He just stared dumbly at Peter who was absolutely seething with anger. Before Wade knew it he hit the concrete hard. Peter had punched him in the face and was yelling who knows what. 

Wade groaned and tried to get up but Peter was picking him up with a single fist grabbing his hoodie and holding him up, "ARE YOU STALKING ME?!" Wade couldn't find the words fast enough, he was stalking Peter, and he was still crying. He was so tired, and so overwhelmed that he started crying even more. 

A traitorous sob broke from Wade and Peter slowly returned him to the ground. Wade fell to his knees and was pleading with Peter, apologizing to Peter. "I'm so sorry baby boy, I'm sorry- I- I just-" Peter cut him off. This was enough, this was disgusting. Wade had the fucking nerve to break up with him, stalk him, and now he was kneeling on the concrete saying useless meaningless shit. 

"FUCK OFF WADE!" Peter was screaming, "' _It's over'_ remember?! That's what you said!" the venom in Peter's voice could be mistaken for nothing else but pure hatred. Did Peter really hate Wade? Neither man was sure. "Don't follow me, don't talk to me, don't fucking even think about me you fucking bitch!" 

Wade took it all in, he heard every word, every intonation, every pause in between. He looked up at Peter whose fists were clenched, whose face was red with anger. Wade bit his lip under his mask, "I-" he tried but Peter was there, " _SHUT UP!_ I don't want to hear it! I HATE YOU! GET AWAY FROM ME!" with that Peter turned around and continued his walk. Wade was still kneeling on the concrete, Peter hated him.  _Peter hates me._ It broke Wade, what glued, taped, welded remains of him were left were completely broken now. The only person who had really made him feel happy, the only person he really cared about hated him. It was a gross irony, and it was to be expected. Wade cursed himself for forgetting who he was, a disgusting freak mercenary who didn't deserve happiness. Why wouldn't Peter hate him was a better question. 

~

Peter went to his classes for the day, Wade still followed him but kept a much larger distance. Wade had equipped himself with a pair of binoculars and some more long range weapons. Now Peter was heading to Avengers Tower, it was Peter's fourth visit to the Tower in the past few weeks. Wade had gotten in with much difficulty but he had done it. It was on the third visit when he got caught.  _Fucking JARVIS_. Deadpool had been royally kicked out after a brief interrogation in which he pleaded insanity. Which wasn't far off. So now as Peter or rather Spiderman was walking into the tower, Wade had no choice but to bring old reliable Barton into the mix. 

Wade texted the man, 

 **WADE:** Hey birdman wanna do me a solid?

 **CLINT:** That is by far the worst greeting I have gotten from you.

 **WADE:** Yeah man I'm out of it. I'll be fucking honest.

 **CLINT:** You alright?

 **WADE:** Do me a favor and keep an eye on Spidey for me. He's in deep shit and he doesn't know it.

 **CLINT:** DUDE! You're being creepy. He's your ex. Are you checking up on him?

 **WADE:** I'll explain later, but dammit just protect him with your miserable life Tauriel.

 **CLINT:** Will do. You can explain tomorrow, lunch with me and Nat.

 **WADE:** Nat and I**

 **CLINT:** PISS OFF!

 **WADE:** Thanks baby. Cya tomorrow.

~

Peter strolled into Avengers tower, his costume underneath his civies and his mask in his pocket. He was greeted by smiles and quippy remarks all around. In the past few weeks his closeness with Tony had brought him closer to the inner circle of the Avengers. Natasha was now his trainer, and there common spider themes had become a prolonged inside joke between them. Clint was still raving about how good Peter was at kissing, and Bruce had more than once pointed out that Peter was brilliant when it came to science. 

Today the crowd had thinned out, Tony and Bruce were nowhere to be found even though Tony owned the building, and Thor was off in Asgard. Natasha was splayed out on the couch and gave Peter a warm smile and tipped her glass of vodka at him before taking a sip. Clint was sitting at the bar and was eyeing Peter in a weird kind of way, but Peter didn't think much of it. Cap was looking out the window and didn't so much as acknowledge Peter's presence.  _He's so weird lol._  

Peter started walking towards the unisex bathroom that was on the far side of the floor, when Clint stood ubruptly, "Where ya going?" Peter turned around awkwardly and raised his brows, "Uhmm... The bathroom?" Clint sat down again and straightened his vest, "Oh, yeah. Okay."  _Weird._  

Peter walked into the bathroom, he really just had to pee. When he entered though what he found was more than hysterical. His boss, MOTHERFUCKING TONY STARK was quite literally fucking BRUCE "I am science' BANNER.  _OH MY FUCKING GOD!i_  Tony had Bruce pressed up against the granite counter and Bruce's arms were on Tony's hips pulling him closer. Their mouths were merged and Tony was holding Bruce's face in his hands, and jesus were they LOUD! 

In Peter's opinion they were too old to be fucking around like this, and it was just really funny for some reason. Peter burst out laughing and both men jumped back from each other. Peter saw the look of pure shock on their faces and it made him laugh even more. He didn't know why he found this funny, but it was. He had just walked in on two forty something men making out in a bathroom, what were the odds?! 

Peter bent over in laughter, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but-" he could barely speak, and  now he really had to pee.

Tony straightened out his shirt, and Bruce combed a finger through his hair. "We... uh-" 

"No, no. Continue. It's all good. I'm all for this biology experiment I really am," Peter kept laughing. 

Tony looked very very uncomfortable, and Bruce crossed his arms and was trying to keep a straight face (straight lol). 

"Don't tell anyone," it was Tony speaking and the man seemed to be having trouble figuring out where he should put his hands. 

Peter cackled with laughter, "You own the whole fucking building and you chose to do this in the communal bathroom. For two geniuses you guys are mad dumb!" 

The two men fidgeted where they stood. "He does have a point Tony," and Tony only groaned. "Parker I'm serious don't tell anyone!" 

Peter straightened up (lol straight) and rushed to one of the stalls (the bathroom is all stalls because it's unisex) and yelled back, "DON'T WORRY. I GET CLOSETS." 

The two men left the bathroom one at a time and they both excused themselves and went to Tony's bedroom instead. 

~

Peter finished peeing and laughing hysterically and joined Natasha on the couch. Clint also joined them and they turned on RuPaul. Clint really enjoyed the makeup, and Natasha liked the heels, Cap left without saying anything. 

While watching Peter couldn't help but go over what had happened with Wade earlier that day. He had punched the guy, he had punched Wade,  _oh my god,_ and he had told Wade that he hated him,  _oh my god._ Peter knew he didn't hate Wade, he definitely hated the situation. And seeing Tony and Bruce, and watching RuPaul, Peter really did start to miss the merc.  _DAMMIT_ , Peter tried to push Wade out of his mind, but he couldn't help it. He was over the "I'm single let's get it" rush of a breakup and now for the second time really missed Wade. He contemplated texting and apologizing, but thought better of it. Peter started crying, he didn't know why, he knew deep down inside though that it was because he really did have feelings for Wade. Every other relationship Peter had been in was flawed from the beginning, but Wade and him, that had been so genuine, so good. Now it was gone and Peter didn't even know why. Peter cried and cried, and Natasha hugged him and told him everything would be okay and that guys were jerks. Clint handed him a glass of vodka and told him it was okay to cry. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are gonna get wild from here. The next chapters are gonna be actioned packed and this fic is gonna take a twist into the very very trippy. Hope you enjoyed "normal" in the previous chapters cause it's all going down the drain.


	20. 8-bit Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The month is over and Wade will do almost anything to buy Peter some more time.

Peter was sitting in his favorite coffee shop with MJ discussing all the new Stark Tech they had to catalogue and how they would unveil it with the marketing team. MJ was a bit jealous that Peter as Spiderman got to hang out with Tony Stark but Peter promised that eventually he would get MJ and invitation to Avengers Tower. 

Wade was sitting in the back corner of the cafe, a black hoodie and a baseball cap. He was scanning everyone in the shop and profiling them like crazy. The mercenary had gotten into some trouble the previous days, obviously everyone had noticed that he was targeting people on the forum and now he had a shitload of people out for him. This was at times good because it meant that the people Wade wanted dead came to him, so it made his life a little easier if not more dangerous. 

The month was almost up, in fact today was the last day. Wade was uneasy because he was staring at a very alive Peter and there were so many murderers for hire left in the galaxy. He had pushed back his lunch date with Nat and Clint because he had been very busy unaliving all the jerks out for his baby boy. 

 **CLINT:** You free right now?

 **WADE:** Why, want a blow job?

 **CLINT:** I don't need you for that. 

 **WADE:** UGh, my hearrtt ITS" bREAKING

 **CLINT:** You broke mine when you canceled our lunch date.

 **WADE:** UGHH. FINEEEE. I'll text you the address.

~

A few minutes later and Peter and MJ were still talking about random things and scrolling silently through their phones like best friends do. Clint and Natasha showed up and met Wade in the back, they were both wearing civies, and all three of them had hoods on. It looked pretty weird but eh nobody really cared that much. 

"Mercenary turned stalker, how lovely," Natasha chided as she sat down, signing her words for Clint.

The archer only smirked at Wade, and signed, "So why're you weirdly stalking your ex?"

Wade visibly groaned and leaned back in his chair and signed the whole story everything from SHIElD and the forums to the killing and the breakup. By the end of it Natasha and Clint were both at a loss for words, Wade was obviously really struggling and Peter was completely oblivious. 

"Wow even when you're sweet you're creepy," was Natasha's reply, and Clint could only laugh in agreement. The situation was serious and they were at a loss, Natasha agreed that if she were in Wade's situation she would have probably done the same thing, if only a little more subtly. Clint asked why Wade hadn't just told Peter instead of breaking up, and Wade was at a loss cause it did seem like a more rational approach, but fuck rationality he was Deadpool. They spent about an hour talking about it and by the end Wade was just glad he had told someone, and both the redhead russian and the makeup loving archer agreed that they would keep an eye on Peter and SHIELD before they left. 

~

Some five minutes passed and Peter got up from where he and MJ had been enjoying their free time and Wade moved to get up as well. The next thing he knew was he was staring at his phone screen, the 8-bit quality cruel in its cold squares. 

Wade didn't know what was happening in that moment. It was a message he had hoped he would never receive. His heart was beating so fast he felt numb, all he could see were those words and Peter,  _god Peter_. Before he knew it Peter was out of his sight and he was staring at someone else, someone new.  _FUck_. The man had brown hair, he was about the same height, same complexion, he would do. He had to. 

Deadpool was in a back alley staring at this man whose name he didn't even know. He took out his phone and replied with a location. He placed the dead look alike in a body bag and took it the warehouse where SHIELD would meet him. 

Did he feel bad? Did he feel bad about killing an innocent person? Under other circumstances yes. If this had happened a month ago Wade would have crumbled to his knees and cried and cursed his existence and would have carried the memory with him to the end, but this was happening now. Yes Wade Wilson, Deadpool had killed an innocent man because he looked enough like Peter that it would buy him some time. Did he feel bad? Maybe, but he didn't care because this was for Peter. 

~

Peter and MJ had gone back to his apartment, today was a lazy day. The sky was cloudy and neither of them felt like going back to work, oh well if they missed half a day. MJ had spent the majority of her time back in Queens with Peter, and neither was complaining. Peter honestly needed a distraction, because he found when he was alone he started to think about Wade, so the past month was spent at numerous parties, clubs, and Peter had drunk so much he was surprised his liver hadn't given out. He told himself he was drinking because he liked the feeling, of course it wasn't to forget about Wade, of course not, that would be ridiculous. 

"Hey Pete, what's this?" MJ was holding a small wrapped package in her hand. She had been rummaging through Peter's desk trying to find a thumb drive when she had stumbled upon it, "TO: WADE" written across it. She wasn't sure if Peter had kept it on purpose or if he had just forgotten to throw it out. MJ had spent the last month distracting Peter from his breakup, and it was fun she wouldn't mind doing it forever but she knew if Peter found this when he was alone it would end in tears. 

Peter looked to where MJ was waving the gift and realization dawned on him, that was a gift for Wade. He didn't even want to think about what was inside it yet alone look at it. "It's just- It was a gift for Wade." 

"Want me to throw it out?" MJ asked unsure, Peter's face had instantly drained of color. 

"No, just put it back. I'll get to it eventually," Peter couldn't bring himself to throw it out, if he didn't gift the contents to Wade then- then he didn't know.  _UGH!_

~

Wade or rather Deadpool was standing in the center of a dimly lit warehouse, the body bag laying haphazardly by his feet. As if on cue the SHIELD agents dressed in camo came into view. They were standing in a formation guns raised and after assessing the situation they lowered their arms and parted exposing the wicked woman. 

Her short white hair gleamed, and her blue pencil skirt and matching blazer starkly contrasted with the camaflouge of her heavily armed military body guards. Deadpool threw the bag at her feet and it made a disgusting cracking sound as if the bones inside had broken with the harsh treatment. Wade would have winced had he not been pissed. The woman smiled or rather grinned at the mercenary who was wondering why he hadn't killed this woman yet. 

"I didn't think you were one to procrastinate Mr. Wilson," her silver eyes flashed wildly.

"DIDn'T THINK? Well isn't that unfortunate," Wade was not in the mood, "Listen bitch are we done here cause my soaps are on in an hour and I REALLY WANNA KNOW if Ricardo is exposed as the lying bastard he is." 

The woman cocked her head and placed the crude black briefcase she was holding on the warehouse floor next to her. One of the soldiers picked up the body bag and the soldiers once again closed around her, they walked out of the warehouse and the women's shrill voice called out, "Thank you for your cooperation Mr. Wilson." It took all of Wade's strength not to shoot her brains out, but he knew it would accomplish nothing, she was just a mouthpiece for whatever more evil thing commanded her. 

~

Wade goes home, he's tired and he wishes this was over. Wished everything was over, but he knew it wasn't. How could it be with Peter still alive? It would take SHIELD only a few hours to figure out that the body wasn't Peter's. Wade had marred the face enough that they wouldn't be able to tell immediately. Nonetheless Wade wasn't ignorant and he knew the war was only still coming. 

He packed up the rest of his apartment, took all his weapons and ammo, strapped them to his suit and the rest he piled into two hefty duffle bags. He packed up his laptop and all his phones, the apartment was left looking like a picture from a catalogue. No pictures, nothing personal, just furniture. He walked to Peter's apartment, on the way meeting some of his favorite homeless people.

"HIyA FrED!" 

"Ayye, DP my main mercenary." 

"Listen Kreuger, there's a free apartment on the ground floor of that there building. Rents payed till next year so make good use of it." 

"Damnnn. DP? You for real?" 

"YUP! Pinky promise. Don't forget to share Fred, tell Cindy and Merkil, and Dante, and Sakya and everyone else about it too alright. The kitchen's stocked," and with that Wade continued his walk to Peter's apartment. He had set up some more cameras all around the building and had strategically placed bombs around the place. It didn't look like it but the place was a fortress. 

Wade climbed up the fire escape and settled himself on the roof, he flipped open his laptop and started lazily watching the feeds. He hadn't eaten anything in awhile, and he hadn't slept in a month and he felt overall shitty. It wouldn't be long until Peter's name was on the forums. It would be up by tonight for sure, and maybe the attacks would be slow in coming, but they would come, and Wade was ready dammit.

~

Peter and MJ were sprawled over the couch watching a Harry Potter marathon that was always on ABC for no apparent reason, but hey no one was complaining who didn't like a Harry Potter marathon? 

Peter was barely paying any attention, he had the strangest feeling that he was being watched. It wasn't his Spidey-sense, that he knew for sure but he couldn't shake the feeling. He thought it might be all in his head, but part of him thought or rather knew that it was Wade. Who else would it be, and if he was being stalked he hoped it would be Wade and not someone else. After everything Peter knew that Wade would never hurt him on purpose, and for that he would be forever thankful. 

~

Wade didn't know if he was hallucinating or if it was for real but Peter looked directly at one of the cameras he had placed in the paneling of the tv stand. Wade stared back, heart pounding. 

He didn't know, couldn't even imagine what it would be like to live in a world without this man, with his big brown doe eyes and his fluffy hair... Wade's eyes strained against the oncoming waves of sleep, and he dozed off images of Peter tattooed on the back of his eyelids.

~

It was late and they were still showing the Half Blood Prince. MJ had fallen asleep her red hair draped across her shoulders and her legs wrapped up in a spider man blanket. Peter was staring out the window at the city and all its lights and all its pollution and dreamed about Wade, about tomato hearts, and roses, and tacos, and Wade. 

~

He starled awake, he wasn't meant to fall asleep.  _NO!_ His computer screen flashed unforgivingly, there at the top of the forum hit list... PETER PARKER.

 


	21. Over Soon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter's name has made it's way onto the forums, and now all the criminals Wade didn't kill are out for the arachnid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter features physical domestic abuse and is overall a lot of angst. If you feel that you can't read this chapter I will be happy to summarize it more fully for you in a comment.  
> Also I apologize in advance that this chapter is pretty heavy and does not have comedic relief.

Spiderman was panting and tired as fuck. He had been kicking criminal ass for the last seven hours and honestly this was a work out he had not signed up for. The city's crime had been so low the past month but now all of a sudden everyone was out for him like fucking cicadas. 

"HaHA! Peterrr deariee," the creepy guy crooned as he gestured for Spiderman to come closer.  _HOW THE FUCK DOES HE KNOW MY NAME?_  

"Whose Peter?" Spiderman cocked his head and shot a web at the man who jumped quickly out of the way. He was absolutely disgusting and his voice was a loud whisper at all times which was pretty unnerving. The man started cackling hoarsely, "It's you deariee, your secrettt's outt." Peter's heart was racing,  _omfg._  

Who could've done this? Who knew that Peter Parker was Spiderman other than SHIELD, the Avengers, MJ and.... Wade! 

The creepy villain man jumped at Peter knife in hand and Spiderman was too slow to move out the way and the criminal managed to slash across his face cutting through his mask. Peter was beat, he was tired, he was bruised all over, and now he was bleeding profusely. He swung uselessly at the man who was undoubtedly trying to kill him but instead managed only to stumble to the other side of the alley. The man started cackling again and started advancing on Peter but was cut short. 

Peter looked up just in time to see a giant red mass slam into the sickly thug. There was a slash, gasp, groan, thump. Deadpool had flayed the man alive and he was absolutely seething. The corpse of the murderer wannabe splayed haphazardly on the dirty asphalt of the alley. Wade sheathed his katana and turned to his baby boy. He grasped the smaller man's cheek and inspected the damage, "Oh my god Petey are you oKAY??" 

Peter was furious!  _OKAYY??? OKAY?! WHAT KIND OF SICK QUESTION?!_ Peter pushed Wade away, "DO I LOOK OKAY TO YOU?" Peter did not look good. Blood had soaked the side of his mask and he was bruised and broken looking. Wade backed up a few steps, "Hey, hey baby boy-"

"SHUT UP!" Peter tore off his mask, "DON'T CALL ME THAT!" 

Wade's heart was breaking apart, he had watched Peter the whole day since he had woken up. It was Saturday, there was no work or school, but Peter had been called to morning patrol. Since his name had gone up on the forum it took only a few scrolls to find out that Peter Parker was Spiderman, some asshole SHIELD agent had leaked the info and Wade had spent the better part of the night shooting people's brains out. 

Wade had followed Peter or rather Spiderman the whole morning, keeping a safe distance but it hurt. It hurt Wade more than anything to have to watch Peter fight all those criminals for hours and not be able to help. Granted they were all pretty minor because Wade had proactively taken care of the big guns. Still though, it hurt and Wade finally lost his shit once the creepy dude slashed his baby boy's face open.

Peter was still angry, "WHO TOLD THEM!? WAS IT YOU?" Sadly enough Wade knew exactly what Peter was talking about, secret identities were no joke and Wade had crushed a few skulls in anger when Spiderman's had been revealed. 

"Peter, please let me explain," Wade was trying really hard, he really was. 

"EXPLAIN WHAT?!" Peter was absolutely red, and not just because of the blood, "First you  _break_ my heart, then you  _stalk_ me, and now you've gone and told the WHOLE DAMN WORLD who I am. WHAT ELSE IS THERE WADE?  _WHAT ELSE?!_ " Tears threatened the boundaries of Peter's eyes but he refused to cry, not now, not in front of Wade. 

"PetER pleasseee listen I-" 

"SHUT UP! THERE'S NOTHING MORE! YOu should've just KILLED ME!" Peter was screaming, he was tired and stressed, and so frustrated. Wade couldn't take it anymore at that point.  _Killed PEter? KILLED PETER!_ That's exactly what Wade was trying to fucking avoid the whole past month. Yeah if Wade had killed Peter life would've been a lot easier for him too.  _JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!_  

"YOu want me to KILL YOU? IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT PETER?!" Wade's voice was filled with acid, god after all this Peter had the nerve to say that of all things. 

Peter shot a look of pure hatred at Wade, "I'll do it myself," Peter's voice was coated with spite and sorrow. Wade had he been sane would have lost all of his mind at that moment, the man he loved with everything he had wanted to die, how could he live with himself after a confession like that? 

Just as Wade was about to apologize for everything and beg for forgiveness another lowly criminal out for Peter walked into the alleyway. Wade shot the man right between the eyes before he could even blink. Wade had killed more people in this past month than he had in the previous year. Peter screamed and chastised Wade for killing people, for not killing him, for breaking his heart, for everything. Wade tried desperately to plead with Peter to make him stop talking so he could explain but none of it worked. 

Wade's phone buzzed, and Peter was still yelling at him. 

 **CLINT:** You got incoming, theres about thirty of them. 

Wade growled, he did not have time for this. "PEter! LISTEN TO ME WE HAVE TO GO!" But the arachnid only crossed his arms and continued screaming, Wade prayed to Thor that he would be forgiven for what he was about to do. "I'm really sorry," he yelled as he uppercut into Peter's jaw knocking the man out. Wade caught him before he hit the pavement and threw him over his shoulder and ran back to the main street. He had to get Peter to safety, there was too many people out for him. 

~

Natasha knocked on the door of the old single family. It took a few moments before the door swung open and a cheery old woman stood in the doorway, "Is there something I can help you with dear?" 

The russian spy smiled brightly, "Mrs. Parker, I'm Natasha Romanoff could I talk to you for a few minutes? It's about Peter." Aunt May's smile faded instantly and worry washed over her,  _was Peter okay?_   She ushered Black Widow inside, of course she knew who Natasha Romanoff was. She might be old, but she wasn't out of tune. 

"Is Peter alright?" Aunt May sat down on the frayed armchair and motioned for Romanoff to take a seat as well. Nat sat down smoothly not breaking the smile on her face, "He's fine Mrs. Parker, but there is something you should know..." 

Black Widow explained carefully to Aunt May that Peter Parker was Spiderman and that his secret identity had been compromised. She explained in great detail that the only reason Peter hadn't told her was because he didn't want her in any danger, and that now she needed to bring her to Avenger's Tower so that Aunt May could be protected better.

Mrs. Parker took the whole thing in stride, nodding solemly while Natasha explained the situation. After everything she grabbed her coat and packed a few belongings into a carry on bag and went with Natasha to Avengers Tower, it was a long drive.

~

Wade took Peter to an underground bunker in Nevada right in the heart of the Mojave. The bunker was heavily fortified and generously stocked. Land mines surrounded the place and the titanium alloy walls were unforgiving. It wasn't especially large, but it was far from claustrophobic. One wall was lined with weapons and ammunitions, and the opposite lined with tanks of water, boxed foods, and medical supplies. There was an old computer with a one way receiver, it could get messages but not send them; and there was a bed. The rest of the place was hard metal, and door to a smaller room that would be a bathroom. 

The deadly mercenary gently placed Peter on the bed. Throwing off his mask and gloves and washing his hands he pulled out the medical supplies and cleaned out the gash on Peter's face. The man didn't wake, and Wade was sorry he had hit him so hard. Wade quickly finished stiching up the wound and moved to inspect the rest of the man. Wade was just about to lift up Peter's shirt to check if there was any cuts worth bandaging when Peter stirred awake and kneed Wade straight in the jaw. 

The once towering merc stumbled back falling onto the cold metal floor. "WHERE AM I?" Peter was looking around his eyes wide with fear. 

"You're in a bunker in Nevada," Wade said softly, not moving to rise from the floor. He knew how it looked, he was a freaky unstable mercenary who had just stalked and kidnapped his ex boyfriend and was just lifting up his shirt. Motives be damned, it looked disgusting. 

Peter having taken in his surroundings looked at Wade with pure anger and disgust on his face. The smaller man didn't register the look of pain on Wade's face before he pounced on the mercenary. Peter hit Wade hard smashing his head into the unforgivingly hard floor. Wade didn't even try to stop him, he knew he deserved this. "YOU. KIDNAPPED! ME?" Peter screamed between punches. Wade couldn't reply, his jaw was broken and his mouth was filled with blood. He didn't stop Peter, he didn't even flinch as Peter hit him over and over again. Finally Peter with one last scream of disgust and anguish slammed Wade back hard enough that his skull cracked and his neck snapped, blood sputtering out of his mouth and gushing from his face. 

Peter panted his hands bloody as he still sat on Wade's liveless body. Realization dawning upon him he jumped off the body and crawled to the corner of the bunker. Tears streamed down his face as he wrapped his arms around his legs and rocked back and forth.  _Omg what have I done? I just killed Wade. He kidnapped me. Where am I? What am I going to do? Omg, I killed a man. I killed... I- I-_

Shock, anxiety, and panic ran through Peter all at once he was frozen in place, he was crying, he wanted to die. 

Wade's face slowly reformed, the internal damage repaired layer by layer until finally he opened his eyes which if he had been a normal man would have been black and blue. Wade got up from where he was laying and quickly scanned the room to find Peter, who was curled up in a corner crying and clearly going into shock. The mercenary quickly ran over to his baby boy, "Hey, shh, It's okay. It's okay. Shh." Peter wasn't responding. Wade picked him up as gently as he could and layed him on the bed, and wrapped a bunch of blankets around him. 

"Peter, shh. Hey. It's okay. Peterr. Pleaseee," Wade was crying too now. After some time Peter calmed down, the shaking gone, and the blood returning to his face. He was so tired, he was so sick of everything. 

"I- I'm- I'm sorry Wade," Peter couldn't find his breath. Wade smoothed his hair back and soothingly rubbed his shoulders and down his arm, "Hey Peter, it's okay. You didn't do anything wrong." 

Peter knew that wasn't true, he had stepped over the line. It didn't matter that Wade would come to life, that was completely irrelevant. Peter had killed Wade, and there was no coming back from that, there was no apology that would suffice. 

"No, Wade. It's not okay. I killed you, I- I can't- It's not-" 

"Peter, please. Please just go to sleep, and please just rest okay. We can talk about it later," Wade didn't care that Peter had killed him, Wade had killed himself enough times that dying meant nothing. Yes it hurt. Yes it hurt even more that the man he was trying to save killed him, but it didn't matter. Peter could hate him and kill him and hit him and he would still do it all over again. 

Peter was rocked to the core, what he had done was- was indescribably- It was the worst thing he had ever done in his life, and he would give everything he had to undo it. Even though he knew he could never undo it. Soon enough exhaustion hit him and Peter fell into a troubled sleep. 

Wade was tired too, he was hungry after regenerating but he didn't feel like eating, he was sleepy but he didn't feel like sleeping. He sat against the wall reveling in the cool smooth feel of the surface. He was thinking about everyone who was still alive, everyone who was still trying to find Peter, everyone in the whole fucking Galaxy, and who knows maybe there was more, maybe some sick bastard had gone and turned this into a dimensional war. All he knew was that Aunt May was safe with Natasha, and Tony had promised to take care of MJ, and now all Wade had to do was take care of Peter and it would all be over soon. 

[ _Ha! OVER SOON? Who are ya kidding buddy boy_.]

{ _I don't why you're still protecting this guy, he's never gonna love you back. No matter what. You're too shitty._ }

" _It doesn't matter if he doesn't love me, I love him and I'm going to keep him safe. There's no good in the world without him."_

{ _What a fucking sap!_ }

Wade drifted off to sleep soon enough, his body demanding that he get atleast a few minutes rest before he was out unaliving again. 

~

Peter woke up with a jolt, memories flooded his mind. He was out of tears, and he sat up and looked around for Wade. Peter found him slumped against the wall asleep, just a few feet away was his died blood marring the otherwise spotless floor. Peter didn't want to wake him or touch him because he was afraid. Peter didn't know himself anymore. There was only two doors in the bunker, one on the cieling and one on the wall. Assuming the one on the cieling led to civilization, Peter opened the one on the wall. Inside was a small bathroom with only a sink, toilet, and mirror. He stepped inside and saw how red and puffy his eyes were from crying, and the stitches that now ran across his left cheek. Peter washed his hands thoroughly, getting rid of the blood that was Wade's. It was the worst feeling, it was the worst sight, Wade's blood on his hands. After he was satisfied with now rubbery clean hands he examined his face more closely. The stiches were small and so carefully placed. They were perfectly even like a cross stitch design and it made Peter's heart lurch. Wade had always been so loving, so gentle, so... Wade. Peter lifted his shirt to make sure he was in one piece everywhere else too and found that he was bruised all over, but they were fading and they didn't hurt too much. 

He padded back into the main bunker and before he could take another two steps Wade jumped awake. He was on his feet in seconds and quickly assessing and it wasn't until he found Peter and no sign of any threat that he relaxed. Peter's heart broke even more at that moment, of course all Wade cared about was his safety, of course this man was the most altruistic in the world.

"Before you get mad at me please let me explain," Wade blurted out in a whisper trying to make himself as small as possible. He didn't know if Peter would hit him again, and yes he would endure it but that didn't mean he liked it. It was one thing to be hit in a fight, it was another thing to be hit by someone you love. 

Peter's eyes welled with tears at the hunched figure of the mercenary, "Wade, I'm sorry..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It all gets better next chapter I promise.


	22. Dead Lines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade finally gets the chance to explain everything to Peter.

"Yeah? Well I'm sorry too babe," Wade was too tired. Peter tried to move, tried to say something but before he could Wade was talking again.

"I broke up with you, I STALKED YOU,  _AND I KIDNAPPED YOU!_ Guilty as fucking charged," his voice was bitter and ravaged.

"...and you killed me. So I'd say it's even," Wade looked straight at Peter, those masked eyes piercing. 

"Wade... that's not how it works," Peter was on the verge of tears, this was the closest Wade had ever gotten to yelling at him, and he deserved so much worse. 

"WELL ITS HOW IT FUCKING WORKS NOW!" Wade harshly took his mask off so Peter could see everything. So Peter could see the hurt and pain in Wade's eyes, so he could see the days of sleep that had been sacrificed, so he could see the meals, and the lives, and everything Wade had done. 

Wade calmed down, he wouldn't yell at Peter. He couldn't. "Could ya just please sit down so I can explain?" 

Peter didn't say a word, but he sat on the edge of the bed hands in his lap and head down. He couldn't stand to look at Wade, this man who had given him everything. Peter saw it all now, he remembered. Peter remembered how Wade had saved his life, how he had helped him through his breakup, how he had helped him come out to Aunt May. Wade had helped Peter through his worst moments. Wade had sacrificed so much in those months that they had been together, had been friends, Peter could only imagine what Wade must've done for him in the past month. 

Wade crossed his arms, this was the moment he dreaded the most. It was confession time, he would tell Peter everything he hadn't that night four weeks ago. Wade explained everything, ever detail down to the last second. He explained about SHIELD and the job, the forums and the death, the motives behind everything he had done the past month. 

He told Peter about the bugs in his house, about the way sometimes he couldn't help but fantasize, about the way he hated himself for it. 

"And GOD PETER," tears were streaming down Wade's face now, "That night when you looked straight at the fucking camera I- I thought I might die. I thought I might really die because I didn't think I could live without you. I knew I couldn't." 

Trails of salt rolled down Peter's cheeks, how could he have been so stupid. He had hated Wade for protecting him, for protecting Aunt May and MJ and everything. Wade hadn't just protected Peter from physical hurt, he had protected Peter from all the paranoia and anxiety that would've come if he had known he only had a month left to live. 

"Petey- I know what it feels like to be given a deadline," Wade's voice broke, "I didn't want you to ever know what that felt like." 

Peter lost it. He couldn't understand, he couldn't fathom what this man had been through. This man had been through hell and worse and he was still the most kind and caring person. It's always the people who have seen the coldest cruelties that are the kindest. Peter jumped up from where he was sitting and closed the distance between him and the merc. Peter hugged Wade like a life line, he was Peter's life line, "Wade don't ever forgive me, I'm so sorry." He cried into Wade's shoulder and the merc's arms came around the smaller man, "How could I not baby boy." 

Peter wrapped his arms around Wade's neck, "I don't deserve you."

"Shh, I love you," Wade's arms wrapped tighter around Peter's waist. 

"I love you too," Peter sobbed, soaking Wade's suit. Some time passed before they broke apart, still staying close. Peter looked up at Wade's face, tears like glitter on a scarred canvas. He reached up and wiped the tears away, and Wade smiled softly before he did the same to Peter. 

"Come on," Peter spoke softly and he gently pulled Wade towards the bed, "Even with your healing factor you need to sleep." They both got into the full sized bed, Wade pulling Peter closer. He hadn't thought that he would ever get to hold Peter like this again, and he would savor every moment of it. 

"Could we just start where we left off?" Wade whispered into Peter's soft brown hair. 

Peter moved up and placed a soft kiss on Wade's forehead, "Whatever you want Wade... just rest awhile." It wasn't a perfect answer, but it would suffice. Wade fell asleep wrapped in Peter's arms. He didn't have any dreams, he didn't hear any voices, he didn't startle awake every five seconds. He just slept, and it was the best sleep he had gotten in a long long time. 

Peter didn't loosen his grip for a moment, Wade looked so peaceful when he slept. Peter had thought he would never get to see him like this again. Wade had broken Peter's heart but he had done it with the best intentions. Peter forgave Wade for everything, and he was far from forgiving himself. The world outside knew who Spiderman was, the world outside wanted him dead, but here with Wade he knew he was safe. 

Peter kept his arms wrapped around the large mercenary the whole night, he didn't sleep himself he was memorizing the shapes of Wade's face because if Peter did die then he wanted this image to flash before him. 

~

The screen on the old computer started flashing violent blacks and greens beeping with every few seconds. Wade jerked awake slipping out of Peter's grasp in seconds. He ran towards the computer and read the flashing screen. 

The green letters on the black screen were violent and they made Wade's head spin. "Petey, we're in trouble." 

Peter walked over to where Wade was towering over the ancient computer and wrapped his arms around his waist, "It'll be alright." Peter had no way to know for sure, but he trusted Wade. One of them had to be calm and at this moment it was Peter's turn. 

Peter had been heart broken and in denial because of Wade, but now he had this loving man back and everything seemed okay. If the universe had begun to crumble Peter would have said the same exact thing, because with Wade he knew it would all be alright.

And somehow Wade found it in himself to believe his baby boy.

~

They spent the next four minutes like that just staring at the flashing screen, until the message changed to "Arrived."

Peter let go of Wade and they moved to the door tightly bolted to the cieling. Wade expertly turned the large wheel unlocking it and pushing it aside. Hot desert sand fell into the bunker as the door slid out of the way. Wade lifted himself through the rectangular hole and Peter followed suit. 

The desert air was hot and relieving. It felt so open so free, something both men knew they wouldn't feel for a long time. Thor landed with a muffled thud on sand, "Greetings friends!" He quickly moved towards them and wrapped a hand around Peter who grabbed hold of Wade before a column of light engulfed them and they were zooming through space and time. 

They had left behind the dimming purple and orange sky of Earth and found themselves in a golden dome. 

"Heimdall!" Thor's voice boomed, "You are aware of the situation?" Heimdall nodded towards the trio and looked grimly at Peter.

"More aware then I can say." 

~

Thor led them across the rainbow bridge. Wade held Peter's hand tight. The mercenary had been to Asgard before, but it was under much less stressful circumstances. Peter was staring at the bridge, the clear material was streaked with moving light in indescribable colors. It was the most ethereal thing he had ever seen. The air in Asgard felt heavy and ancient, like it had seen more than it cared to remember and Peter suddenly felt very small and insignificant as he realized how big the world was. 

"Don't think too much about it Petey, space is wack!" 

Peter smiled, Wade always knew what to say, "It's so beautiful." 

"It's beautiful and wacky!"

Peter laughed, Wade hadn't heard that laugh in so long and it filled him with warmth. Warmth he hadn't felt in what seemed like forever. "Beautiful and wacky just like you," Peter giggled placing a kiss on Wade's masked cheek. 

~

Soon they were at the towering palace made of long rods of some gold colored metal which Peter was sure was much more valuable than actual gold. They entered the large hall of the throne room and the guards did not so much as blink in curiosity at the red clad aliens. 

Thor ushered them through a side hall and opened a door to a large bedroom with a four poster bed and an open balcony. The breeze made the sheer white curtains sway into the room and the rich colors of the room were intoxicatingly gorgeous. "You will be safe here my friends. Nothing will harm you now."

"Thanks the mostest Viking boy!" 

"Thank you Thor." 

The Norse God nodded and turned to leave, "I have a dinner invitation, if you are in need of anything yell." 

The two earthlings nodded as Thor left.

"So... he didn't get the job done," a cool silky voice crooned. Peter and Wade both turned to where the noise had come from. Leaning against a pillar next to the balcony was Loki. 

"HIYA! I'm a huge fan of your whole "God of Mischief" gig but who da what now job?" Wade sassily cocked his head at the god. 

"Oh I wouldn't dare tell," Loki smiled and pushed off the pillar and came closer to the couple, "Welcome to Asgard nonetheless." 

"Thanks," Peter's smile was far from genuine, he remembered all too well the shit storm Loki had unleashed on New York. The god smiled cruelly at Peter and disappeared into thin air. 

"WEll THAT WAS WEIRD." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Hope you've liked this fic so far. I just wanted to give you a heads up I won't be able to update until the first or second week of September, life's coming at me hard. Sorry about it, but don't worry the rest of the fic is all planned out to a T and the next chapter will have some much needed smut so yup, cya in September!


	23. Lowkey Loki

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki drops some knowledge on the dynamic duo, who end up sexing on the big four poster bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this was so late. Hope you like it!

Wade woke up with Peter wrapped around him. The smaller man was fast asleep with his arms around Wade, and his head resting on his chest. Wade was overjoyed with this, he thought he would never wake up with Peter with him like this again. But even the happiest of thoughts were clouded with the threat that was still imminent.

It took a few more minutes and Peter woke up with Wade in his arms, and it was absolutely delightful. The room was filled with Asgardian Air that smelled faintly of a cool ocean breeze and warm savory foods. Peter lifted his head and unwrapped his arms and found Wade smiling back at him.

"Good morning," Peter smiled, this was like a dream after everything that had happened.

"Oh I'm so glad it's all back to normal," Wade sighed and leaned in and clasped Peter's lips with his own. Peter hummed softly into the kiss, he wished this could be everyday, he wished that the world outside didn't want him dead. He wished he could stay here in this bed with Wade forever.

Peter pulled away and leaned back in the bed staring at the ceiling decorated with a large painting. "Hey Wade?" Peter's voice was quiet and concerned, "Why is SHIELD trying to kill me?"

Wade looked at Peter, his pale skin in this orange pink glow of Asgardian sunlight was too enticing. "I don't know baby boy, but I got a feeling gold horned god over there does."

Peter laughed at that, "His costume is a little much huh."

"Baby, even Lady Gaga thinks Loki is OD when it comes to high fashion." This statement made both men laugh, until a soft knock at the door forced them to quiet.

Wade walked to the door and standing strategically behind it with a weapon in hand he cocked it open. Peering out, he saw that it was only an Asgardian servant girl who carefully stepped in, not staring a moment too long at Wade's unmasked face and nodding curtly towards Peter.

"Good morning, breakfast is served in the dining hall, unless you would like breakfast served here?" her voice of cool and crisp, the Asgardian accent paired well with her soft brown hair and crystal blue eyes.

"Who's eating in the dining hall?" it was Wade who posed the question, his voice was hard and he was still uncertain. Anyone and anything was a threat, and this woman was a stranger. She turned gracefully to face Wade who had his back against the now closed door. "The Princes of Asgard, the Warriors Three, and Lady Sif," she nodded to end her sentence.

Wade had no problem with the people named, he knew them all more or less, and could atleast trust Thor. The merc glanced towards Peter to make sure he had no objections to eating with the rest of the palace. Peter slipped out of the bed, "Yeah, we'll be right down after we get changed."

The girl nodded towards him, "I shall clean the room once you exit. There are various clothings in the drawers," she said pointing towards a large armoire. She waited till Peter or Wade gestured to dismissed her and once Wade had opened the door she left swiftly.

"Why darling you have such good choice in residences, the room service is absolutely charming," Peter sarcastically gestured in a faux accent.

Wade fell into play, "Only the best for my heart, I chose the banisters my self. Are they to your liking love?"

"Oh they make me swoon just to look at them."

"I shall forever be jealous that I may not make you swoon such as that banister," Wade recited as he swooped closer to Peter and grabbed his waist.

"You'd make me faint completely my love," Peter hummed as he drew closer to Wade and they entered the adjoined bathroom together. The black and gold marbled floor was luxurious and it wasn't cold although it should have been. It was a perfect temperature, and it matched perfectly with the gold crown moldings. The bathroom was large and extravagant, the bathtub was sunk into the floor and the water was silky black reflecting its surroundings.

"Mmm, we's got to use that later Spidey," Wade hummed, the tub looked deliciously inviting. Peter agreed, but they decided that that would be later. They were both extremely hungry so they quickly washed up and doned new clothes which were flowy Asgardian outfits that included capes and armor paneling. How comfy was the sarcastic thought of the day.

~

After getting dressed they both rushed out of the room and through the wide gilded hallways to the dining hall which was essentially a long table covered in food and half melted candles. Peter guessed the candle wax covering the table would have dated back centuries if they dug into it far enough.

"FRIENDS! WELCOME!" Thor yelled as he smashed his goblet to the ground, it was quickly replaced with another.

"HIYA Thunder! What's shakin?!" Wade replied as the dynamic duo took their seats.

The Warriors Three were digging into their meal and talking of some hideous monster, Lady Sif was rolling her eyes at the nonsense, and Loki was amusedly eyeing Peter with more than friendly interest.

It didn't take much for Wade to notice the God's steely gaze on his man, and he quickly jumped to the point. "So Mischief Man, what do you know about the sitch?! Huh."

Loki grinned and leaned back in his chair and took a sip of the ancient wine in his goblet, "I was rather hoping you'd ask."

Wade who was wearing his mask despite it clashing with the turquoise of the Asgardian armor, in any other case he would not have commited such a fashion travesty, in fact he had once called out Taskmaster for his frightful pairing of colors. Boy, was that long ago.

"Well then why don'tcha get to it horns?" Wade cocked his head, and Peter was afraid he might push the Asgardian Prince too much and end up waging war on the rainbow bridge.

Loki only smiled however, "Oh don't worry arachnid. There won't be any war of which I'm involved."

Wade scarfed down a large slice of whatever meat was on the table careful to hide his uncovered mouth while he chewed. Peter was staring at Loki, who despite his cruel cold ways had an unearthly beauty and grace about him. WEll duh it's unearthly, he's not from Earth idiot.

"See something interesting Peter," Loki dragged out his name in a cold whisper. Wade did not like the sound of that, "OKAY! SO can we Just ABOUT cuT THe BULLShIT becauSE, as much as you're SUPer fANCy british ways go, I ReallY Would like to have a SIMPLEEE conversation. THANK YOU!"

Everyone stopped the chatter and stared at Wade who looked extremely agitated even with the mask on. Peter rested a hand on his shoulder and looked at him concerned, "Wade?" The merc didn't say anything.

Loki snickered at the spectacle, he did enjoy drama, "Well then ask me what you want to know Peter," he kept dragging the name.

Peter stared at him a moment before, "Why is SHIELD trying to kill me? And how do you know anything about it?"

"My my, two questions. Aren't we a little desirous?" Loki clicked his tongue and continued after he got only stares and a seething Wade, which did entertain him quite well.

"Well you see they need you dead because quite frankly you are a liability." Peter, Wade, and Thor now looked at the God of Mischief with confusion on their faces.

"Brother, I do not understand. How is Spiderman a liability as you say?" Thor asked innocently.

"Oh dear. You are all so absolutely thick. Have you no clue of what goes on beyond your own worlds?" Loki sneered at them, but got only blank looks as a reply. He felt as if he were talking to a wall.

"Oh well since you are all morons, Mr. Stark who invented the super soldier serum had it destroyed so it wouldn't get into the wrong hands, and ever since the Earth governments have been trying to get their hands on anything similar. SHIELD or Hydra or whatever you'd like to call it thought you, my dear arachnid were the next option. In fact there are other dimensions where they have succeeded," Loki finished his lecture and everyone, except maybe Lady Sith was absolutely taken off guard.

"Wait, but then why don't they want me alive. To fuck me up that way?" the story didn't add up for Peter.

"How inquisitive. The tech that makes the Super Soldiers is unstable, so they're better of cutting off the source entirely is all," and with that Loki decided he was bored and got up and left the dining hall in his quiet feline way.

Wade was up before anyone could even blink and he was cornering the God who was laughing at the predicament and the evident rage of the immortal mortal.

"How do you know so much," Wade growled. Loki smiled, "Wouldn't you like to know," and with that he vanished.

~

 

After the tense meal Wade and Peter made their way back to the room. "Wade, baby it's okay. We know more than we did before. That's good right?" Peter smiled softly placing a hand on Wade's shoulder trying to ease his mind. Peter didn't want to die, but he didn't mind. He had lived a good life, he had few regrets, and death would be an end of all the crap that was life. Wade saw Peter's death as the exact opposite of that. Peter knew that this whole situation was much harder on Wade than it was on him, and it broke his heart. 

Peter opened the door to the large bedroom, and the couple strolled in. The bed had been made with new sheets, and the curtains which were previously a sheer white had been replaced with a sheer sky blue. The whole place was so beautiful and calming. Wade felt the therapeutic affects of the soft ambiance immediately. 

The girl they had met previously strolled into the chamber from the adjoining bathroom her head slightly bowed, "Is everything to your liking sirs?" Wade smiled softly under his mask, and Peter completely grinned, "It's beautiful. Thank you." The girl smiled brightly at that. "Is there anything else you require for now sirs?" Peter's smile softened, "That's all, thank you." The girl moved towards the door past the couple, but before she could go to far Peter gently grabbed her arm, "What's your name?" The girl was surprised and slightly glad and she whispered, "Avae," before she rushed out. 

When the door closed behind them Wade visibly relaxed, alone with Peter that was always good. Peter took Wade's hand and led him to the bed. If clouds felt like how they looked than it would be this bed. Wade sat on the edge of the bed and Peter rolled off his mask looking at Wade's soft brown eyes and his beautiful marred skin. "You're so pretty Wade," Peter whispered as he started unclasping the Asgardian wear. Wade couldn't help looking at Peter, god he was so beautiful. Peter managed to get all the metal and chiffon off Wade's torso and he ran his hands over Wade's chest. Peter's skin was so smooth and soft, Wade could never get tired of them. "I love you Petey." Peter smiled and kneeling between Wade's legs he slowly worked off Wade's pants until finally it was just Wade. "Baby boy," Wade whined as Peter stepped away and started expertly undressing himself. "Shh Wade, you work too hard." It was true, Wade did work too hard, and Peter had been too ungreatful for too long. Once Peter had finished stripping he walked gracefully over to Wade and kissed him fervently pushing him back down onto the bed. Wade couldn't get over the way Peter moved, he was all legs and he was so graceful and smooth when he wanted to be. 

Peter deepened the kiss running his hands down Wade's chest, Wade's arms roamed over Peter's smooth back feeling the shifting muscles while Peter's tongue explored his mouth. Wade moans, and Peter's lips move to kiss down Wade's neck, sucking and softly biting at the muscles there. Wade's arms bring Peter closer and both of them are achingly hard. Peter continues kissing down Wade, licking at his abs and the deep v of his hips earning pleasurable sounds from deep inside the mercenary. 

At long last Peter comes face to face with Wade's hard length, he licks up the side and Wade's hips arch up off the bed. Peter smiles and lowers Wade back on to the bed by placing a firm hand on his hips. Teasingly Peter licks Wade's tip. "Peteyy," Wade moans the need building up inside him is more than palpable. Peter swallows Wade slowly inch by inch until he's reached the base. Wade gasps as Peter's throat clenches around him and then Peter is moving up and down Wade's length his cheeks hollowing and his eyes staring into Wade's. The merc's hands knot into Peter's hair and the arachnid lifts off Wade and swirls his tongue around Wade's tip before he swallows him whole once more. Peter builds up the pressure in Wade until finally Wade is a squirming mess, "MmHHh Petey, gonna- cum." Peter doesn't stop and Wade comes in his throat and the merc's eyes roll into his head. Peter swallows the sweet saltiness of Wade and rests on the merc's chest while he rides down his orgasm. Peter kisses Wade, and he can taste himself and its so fucking hot. Wade pats Peter's soft hair, "You're a gift baby boy." Peter smiles, "I love you Wade," and he kisses Wade again running his tongue against the merc's. 

Peter wraps his arms around Wade and lifts the muscular man and places him down gently so his head is on the soft down pillows. He then grabs the back of Wade's knees and forces his legs up onto his shoulders. Wade eyes open wide, this is definitely new. Wade loves Peter, he always wanted Peter to feel good, he had never ever thought of this. Yes of course he had bottomed before, but not with Peter, and  _ohmyfuckingAsgardianGod!_ Peter's grin was infectious and unnerving and sexy all at the same time. Peter looked straight at Wade and put his own fingers in his mouth and tantalizingly slowly he worked his saliva slick fingers into Wade, stretching the sensitive muscle. Wade moaned, this was so foreign, and it felt so good. Once Wade had been thoroughly worked open Peter positioned himself and slowly pushed his hard cock into Wade. Both men moaned at the sensation, they had never done this before and now they were doing it on an alien planet, how sexy could that be. "GOd Wadee you're so tight." Peter filled Wade up so well, and Wade hadn't felt this in ages, he moaned as Peter settled inside him all the way and then slowly started to move back and forth, rolling his hips. The feeling was new and it was amazing, Peter made sure to add more spit as he moved faster and faster, slamming into Wade. The merc's head rolled back it felt so good, a pleasurable pain and he was a moaning screaming mess. Peter was loving this Wade, this Wade screaming from pleasure, his Wade. The sounds coming out of his boyfriend and the tight feeling of being inside him sent Peter off the edge soon and with Wade's name on his lips he came inside him and collapsed against the merc. 

They were both soaked in sweat and panting like idiots, "Baby boy, you're amazing!" Wade squealed and Peter laughed hugging the beautiful man. Peter rode down his orgasm with Wade's arms wrapped around him and Wade made a point to cover Peter's entire face in kisses. Once he had caught his breath he twirled his fingers with Wade and pulled the larger man off the bed, "Come on," he whispered and led them to the bathroom. The water of the bathtub had been covered in rose petals and there were candles glowing in every corner of the spacious room casting orange reflections across the black and gold granite. "Fucking Avae," Peter grinned and Wade laughed, that girl was also a gift. 

They step into the water which is gloriously cool and warm at the same time, just the perfect temperature like magic it fits the mood. Wade sits in the pool-like tub and pulls Peter flush against him, and they're both sleepy and tired and fucked. There's scented soaps in a gilded basket at the edge of the tub and Peter grabs some and lathers it all over Wade, and Wade does the same styling Peter's hair into soapy spikes with shampoo. They laugh and throw soap suds at each other and forget all about everything else. Wade wrestles Peter into the water and they're both clean and laughing and splashing around like five year olds in a pool. 


	24. Heart Rates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade has a solution, and Peter thinks it's worth a shot.

Wade was awake and brooding. Last night was amazing, and now staring at a peaceful sleeping Peter he wished every day could be like this. He wished all of this could just be over and Peter could finally be safe. It seemed that no matter what Wade did there was still a threat that hung in the air like dust. He just wished there was a permanent solution, and yes he had thought of just blowing up the world or the entire multiverse for that matter. 

{ _You should kill yourself_ }

[ _Could you shut up! That's not a solution anymore._ ]

_For real though, what is killing myself gonna help?!_

{ _Then you should kill PETEY!_ }

[ _.... Did you just ACTUALLY SaY thaT you DUMB SHItT!_ ]

_WAIT A MINUTE!_

Peter woke up to a muttering Deadpool,  _how wonderful_. He sat up in bed and waved his hand in front of Wade snapping to get the merc's attention. "WADEE! What's going on with the boxes?" Wade was excited, nervous, apprehensive, you could say overall a ball of muscular uncertainty. 

"PETEY! BabY BOy!" Wade yelled and he wrapped Peter into a large bear hug and kissed the bug man like an old grandma would. " _Agh! Wadee,_ " Peter pushed away from the overly mushy mercenary, but was sure to place a kiss on his cheek by way of good morning and "I love you".

"Babe, idk If this idea is complete shit, or if it's the answer to EVERYTHING! but jus hear me out kayy?!" 

Peter was listening, and he was only a little nervous about what Wade was going to say. Hopefully it wasn't anything too over the top like "blow up the world" or something.

"So... what if THEY as in the evils, the antagonists of our here story thought that the sexy, smart, beautiful, perfect PROtagonist was idk you know um... already dead?" Wade was looking at his hands and wringing them together with uncertainty. 

Peter thought over what Wade had just said, it wasn't a terrible idea. It made a lot of sense, but it came with a pretty huge catch. To make it work it would either have to be live undercover as someone else forever or live in hiding. Both of those seemed pretty taboo and Peter wasn't sure if he could do it, but _dammit_ he was tired and so was Wade.

Peter fell back onto the soft pillows in exasperation and Wade was staring at him waiting for a reply. Finally after a few more moments of contemplation, "Well I don't see any other solutions right now so I guess that's what we'll have to do." Peter looked unhappy and Wade cuddled into him resting his head on Peter's chest. 

"I'm sorry, I can't think of anything else. I know it sucks really bad. I'm so sorry Petey-"

"No Wade! It's not that. It's just I don't want to force you into anything you don't want to do, but I don't want to be alone." 

Wade was surprised by this, he didn't have any idea what Peter was talking about. He sat up and swung over so he was straddling Peter's hips and staring down into the big doe brown eyes that were Peter Parker, "Who da wAt nOW?"

Peter smiled slightly, "I'll have to go into hiding, and I'll be alone without you. But I don't want to force you into hiding away from the world and your life." 

Wade smiled his dazzling smile that lit up the whole room and he kissed Peter sucking on his bottom lip, "Baby boy, you are my life." 

~

Wade donned his Deadpool suit which had been freshly laundered and stitched by the lovely Avae and he was going out to meet Peter. The other Peter, as in Quill. AKA Star Lord. 

"Shit author adding new characters all the time. What the hell," Wade mumbled as he flew the "borrowed" Asgardian space ship to some weird underground party planet that Star Lord had asked to meet up at. Wade didn't like the idea of leaving Peter by himself at anytime, especially now; but Peter insisted that he would be "fine" and that Avae and Thor would take good care of him. Wade was worried but Peter really just didn't feel like coming and he wasn't going to force him, so here he was alone on a small planet that was literally the party. The rain was glitter, the rivers flowed with alcohol, the rocks were hallucinogenic, and the acoustics were brilliant. 

Wade landed his craft in the overpacked parking lot area and headed towards the music, it was all bright lights and bodies.

[ _PETEY WOULD HAVE LOVED THIS!_ ]

Wade chuckled at the idea, Peter would have loved this a lot and he'd probably have made out with every single alien on the planet before he wanted to go home. He found Star Lord among the throngs of the more humanoid creatures with a pink girl at his hip. "Wade! What's good bro," was the greeting he offered. 

"'What's good' isn't that pretty recent Earth-616 slang?" 

"I keep myself updated, don't worry. Now you wanted a hide away planet?"

"That would be great kind sir." 

~

Peter was enjoying a nice rosy bubble bath. Wade was worried about leaving him alone but he wasn't really alone, he was in a castle full of warriors and Wade would only be gone for a few hours. Honestly, Peter was just being lazy and he didn't feel like traversing across the galaxy to meet the one and only Star Lord. He did feel kind of bad that Wade was going all that way just for him, but the bubble bath was just so much more enticing than Peter Quill, who frankly just wasn't Peter's type. 

He sunk into the warm water and he felt like he was being wrapped in a velvety blanket. Avae had explained that no matter how long you stayed inside you wouldn't get pruny and the water wouldn't change temperature unless you wanted it to.  _Fuck yeah, that's my type of bath!_  

Peter was just closing his eyes to relax when a pairs of hands grabbed him and before he could react he blacked out.

 Peter woke up with a gasp. All he saw was white, and his heart rate spiked as he realized his arms and legs were clamped down tightly to the hard surface he was lying on. " _NOO!"_ he strained against his restraints but got nowhere. His head ached, and he felt numb, and anxiety washed through him and he started to cry desperately. He was scared, he had never been so scared in his entire life and all he could think of was that Wade would find him, he had to.

~

" _ **WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S NOT HERE!?!?!!!!**_ **"** Wade knocked over the table where Thor was desperately trying to explain that there had been a breach and somehow Peter had been kidnapped. Wade wasn't having it. He grabbed Loki and shoved him against the wall hard enough that the Asgardian Metal dented, "WHERE?" Loki smiled saliciously, "SHIELD" was all he could get out before Wade was gone and a bomb detonated in the great hall of the Asgardian Palace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter sort of maybe partially made up for the crappy last chapter. I do apologize.


	25. Bruises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter has been captured by SHIELD and is being experimented on. Wade gets arrested.

Peter had no idea what was going on, he didn't know where he was, he didn't know where Wade was, he didn't know how long it had been. Right now there was only white walls and memories. There had been people, white masks doing things, things that hurt. Peter had no idea what was going on. There was needles, sometimes there was red, sometimes there was black. There was... there was metal. What else? Peter didn't know what was going on. Breathe.  _Breathe._

~

[ _Is he going to be alright? What if- What if..._ ]

{ _NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO!!!!_ }

"JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!"Wade was seething, this was the last straw. This was not how it was ever supposed to be. His baby boy, his Peter was not going to be hurt ever.  _EVER!_ It had now been 56 hours, and time was a bitch. Where was fucking Cable when you needed him? 

Deadpool had gone straight to the top of SHIELD and wrecked Coulson's mechanical arm for information which led him to back to the lady who had hired him in the first place. She's dead now; but not before she had given up the information Wade needed. The location hadn't been hard to find, it was just out of the way. It was on the heavily populated Xandar in a heavily guarded facility. It had taken Wade 56 hours to find this place, to find his Peter, his life. It was too long and just the thought of what Peter was going through in there- Wade couldn't describe the feeling. 

~

There was loud noises, lots of loud noises. There was screaming, there was- Peter blacked out. 

~

Deadpool blew up the west side of the building, and the whole place was on lock down. There were "doctors" frantically running around securing their "patients". One woman with long dark hair who had been inside the facility now for a good year took the opportunity to grab a scalpel and slice it into anyone who got in her way before she made it out to freedom at long last. 

The mercenary wasn't his usual smooth self, no not today. This wasn't a job, this was life or death, do or die or worse. He twisted necks without seeing, he didn't hear any of the screams of agony or release. He didn't see the rubble of the chaos he had created. All he could see was the next moment, and until he saw Peter he would not, could not stop. 

After what seemed like an eternity Wade finally found Peter, cuffed to a metal table with wires running in and out of him. There was blood on the floor, and that smell, that disgusting hospital smell mixed with hatred, the same smell of Weapon X. Wade died a thousand times in that moment. To see his reason for living unconscious on crude metal abused in unthinkable but not unimaginable ways, it was all too familiar. And it hurt more this time because it was Peter and not himself. 

Wade didn't remember running towards Peter, or gently pulling out the needles from his skin or lifting him into his arms, or leveling the entire facility. All he knew was that Peter was speaking in his unconscious state, and the words that fell out of the limp man's mouth hurt more than anything else.

"He's coming, no Wade. Don't worry. Just breathe, so pretty. Love, hmm. Love. Can't. No hurts. Wade, Wade..."

Peter kept on mumbling, everytime he said Wade's name the mercenary died a little bit more. It hurt, everything hurt. Wade got Peter to the Asgardian space craft and took off before he did anything else, got away from this horrible place, this horrible memory. 

~

Once the ship was safely cruising on auto pilot Wade threw off his mask and got to Peter who was thankfully still unconscious, at least he couldn't feel the pain right now. At least he wasn't screaming. Wade carefully cleaned all of his baby boy with alcohol wipes and bandaged where the needles had been. He ever so carefully removed the stitches that ran along the side of Peter's ribs and removed the chip that had been placed inside. Wade's insides lurched, who could do this to this precious man? Wade crushed the chip in his fist and carefully stitched the incision back up. There was more haphazard stitches on Peter's left arm and Wade took care of that too, although this time it was chips and wires and a whole mess of fucked up, it was like diffusing a bomb. There was bruises on Peter's wrists and ankles where he had been clamped down and it hurt Wade to look but he did and he applied some ice. After some time Peter stopped mumbling and woke up and his eyes were hazy and there were specks of grey in what used to be completely brown. 

~

Peter didn't know where he was or when, or... "Wade?" his mouth was dry and he ached all over. He had to be hallucinating. 

"Oh baby boy, Petey, are you alright. I'm so sorry," Wade was gently embracing him, and Peter had to believe this was real, it was, it had to be. 

"Wade?" his voice was cracked and soft,  _oh god Wade._ Peter started crying, everything hurt and he was so relieved. 

"Petey? God Petey, shh. Tell me what you need? Please, please," Wade was crying now too, it was relief and anger and hurt. 

"It hurts," was all Peter could say, there was terrible images, terrible memories flashing through his head, and god it hurt. 

Wade was up in a moment and feeding Peter some pills and water, and Peter had tasted nothing sweeter. The pain killers put him to sleep and he drifted into a deep undisturbed sleep and it was precious.

~

When he woke up he was wrapped in blankets and Wade was staring at him fully dressed in his Deadpool garb with the mask rolled up to his nose. Peter tried to prop himself up on his elbow but pain shot through his arm so he opted to just lay down instead. "Wade?"

"Hey, baby boy," Wade's voice was quiet and full of love. Peter started crying, he was just so relieved. He had never been so happy to see anyone before. Wade was obviously special but dammit this mercenary was the sweetest, kindest, purest thing in the entire universe and no one could convince Peter otherwise. 

"No baby please don't cry, please. What's wrong? Does it hurt? Aw Petey," Wade crooned softly cupping Peter's face in his gloved hands.

"Wade, I'm so happy to see you." 

The mercenary wiped away Peter's tears and kissed him softly on the lips, "I'm so sorry Peter, I- I never wanted-"

Peter sat up (fuck the pain) and embraced Wade, "Shh, you saved me. Thank you so so much Wade. I love you." 

Wade's heart wrenched, he was elated that Peter was safe and alive but looking at this bruised and battered man was the death of him. It brought back memories of things and times he didn't ever want to think about. The feeling was all too real, Weapon X was when Wade Wilson died and now Peter had been through the same thing. 

"How are you feeling?" Wade knew that bringing it up would hurt Peter, but if he bottled it all up inside things would get even worse. 

Peter thought about the question for awhile, he started to think about what had happened.  _oh god._ It was his worst nightmares come to life. It was- was unthinkable. The people, the things that had grabbed him and he had tried to fight back and then he was strapped to a table and there was needles and white faces, and they sliced him open and there was never any noises except distant screaming, and the white walls that drove him crazy. 

He looked up at Wade who was waiting ever so patiently. Peter's eyes were hazy and the memories hurt just as much as being there, except for one thing and that was Wade. "I don't have the vocabulary to describe what happened. But... I knew you would come for me." 

Peter had spent less than a week being tortured and he had hope, Wade had been in Weapon X for so much longer and he had nothing. Peter understood better now, everything Wade was going through, he understood just a little better all the pain. 

"I don't remember too much, I'm just sore," Peter smiled softly, and now examined his surroundings for the first time. There was ominous green lighting and painted over cement and metal. "Wade, where are we?" 

Wade sighed. He was hoping Peter wouldn't ask that until a little later. "Petey promise not to be mad but we're in the Kyln." 

Peter's jaw dropped, and he dropped exasperately back onto the blankets, "We're in a maximum security prison full of aliens? WHAT?"

Wade sighed again, "I got arrested for breaking that facility, and I wasn't going to leave you so I told them you helped me and they arrested you too." 

Peter didn't know why, but he actually started laughing. That was the funniest thing Peter had ever heard, of course Wade would get them both locked up in a maximum security alien prison, of course. This was not surprising at all, and it was so great. Wade put on a mock pout and Peter kissed him, "Oh baby I'm so not surprised." 

Peter was his usual bubbly sarcastic loving self if not bruised and weak, and that relieved Wade, but he knew it wasn't forever. Peter was undoubtedly still in shock, still trying to comprehend what had happened, and when he did, when the pieces finally clicked in place was when it would get hard.

"You're sure you're okay baby boy?" Wade asked brushing a gloved hand across Peter's bruised cheek. It only stung a little and Peter was too in the moment to notice.

"I'll be okay. Just don't leave me," Peter entwined his fingers with Wade's and kissed the mercenary softly at first and then more passionately, a sorry, a thank you, an I love you all in one gesture. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this. Next chapter brings us back to Earth-616.


	26. Rocket Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wade and Peter have a blast in the Kyln, until a certain "not raccoon" shows up.

The pair spent two days in the Kyln imprisoned but free. For the first time in forever they didn't have to worry about what was going on outside, the people here wanted to kill them for being too fluffy not for anything else. They were in a maximum security prison and they were the happiest they had been in a long time. 

"Baby boy! THis Guy TOOK my KNIFEE!" Deadpool shouted at Peter while holding a short blue troll like humanoid upside down and shaking him furiously.

Peter sighed and ran his hand down his face exasperated, "DP! Put the dude down. We will get you another knife!"

"NOOO! THat KNIFE waS SpECIAL! I fucKed up Taskmaster with that shit!"

Peter laughed, he honestly wouldn't mind spending the rest of his life in this godforsaken prison with Deadpool. Peter walked over to the alien being held captive by his boyfriend fully clad in his Spider-man suit with the yellow prison garb over it and webbed the aliens hands to the floor so he couldn't move at all. Spider-man quickly searched for the knife which wasn't too hard to find (there was only so many pockets in a Kyln approved scrubs). He used the knife to cut the webbing and handed in sassily to Wade, "Are you happy now?" 

Wade's large grin was visible even through the mask as he quickly pocketed his favorite knife, and brought Peter into a bear hug. The groans of all the other inmates were crystal clear anytime the pair got physical, but they didn't care they actually thought it was pretty funny.

The days passed by with relative ease, the accomadations sucked (especially the food) but it was a worry free zone. "Who woulda thought that the most therapeutic place we'd ever go to would be a maximum security alien prison," Peter jibbed as he shoveled another spoonful of whatever was on his tray into his mouth. Wade nodded as he did the same. He wasn't covering his mouth carefully so no one could see his scars, he was in a prison full of aliens and he looked pretty normal comparitively. Here Wade didn't have to be self-conscience, here he could just worry about not worrying. And Peter was full of absolute joy seeing Wade so free. 

After lunch they went back to the cell they had claimed, and because they were so obnoxiously loud the previous night nobody ever came near them. Wade plopped down on the pile of blankets he had stolen from various other inmates and patted his thighs signaling for Peter to sit down, which he did without a second thought. Peter kissed Wade wrapping a hand gently around the merc's neck. "Mm baby boy," Wade moaned into Peter's mouth.

[ _Yes! Spider-babe choke hiM!_ ]

{ _You are such a freak_ }

Wade's hands wrapped around Peter's waist and pulled him up so that the spider could wrap his legs around Wade. They deepened the kiss and they pulled each other's masks off without missing a heartbeat. Wade doing his best to ignore the grey that had made its way into Peter's eyes. Wade could feel Peter's hard on and that made him even harder. Peter ground against Wade and licked his neck causing the merc to moan and fist his hands in Peter's now oily brown hair. Wade was quick with his knife and tore through the back of Peter's scrubs. He ran his hands up the back of Peter's thighs to his ass and then up his shirt feeling the muscles twist under his skin. Peter ran his nose down the yellow fabric over Wade's Deadpool costume and just as he was about rip off the mercenary's pants the static voice of the intercom buzzed to life, "Hey you freaks! I gotta talk and I ain't coming in there until you get out of each other!" 

Wade groaned and knocked his head on the hard cement floor. Peter too sighed and layed down limply on top of Wade. "Fucking Rocket's voice is suchh a turn off," Peter groaned into Wade's chest which incited a booming laughter from the merc. They both got up and sat like two normal only slightly pissed off vigilantes and waited for the arrival of the great Rocket "not a Raccoon". The small alien strolled in his large guns strapped to his sides and the small baby groot resting on his shoulder. "You guys are disgusting! You made me see that! You made Groot see that! You made us all HEAR THAT! Makes me sick." 

Peter and Wade both started laughing uncontrollably falling all over each other. "Next time you can join us Rocky boy," Wade smirked.

{ _Great Wade, now everyone thinks you're a furry!_ }

[ _Please, god no. Stop._ ]

Rocket face palmed. He wasn't in the mood for this right now. He was in the middle of a really great game of beer pong and now he had to come bust these bitches out of prison.

"Could you two love bugs get out of each others asses for just teensy second! CAUSE YOU GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE before SHIELD busts your skulls!"

Wade and Peter both stopped laughing. The world beyond the walls slammed right into them, and they were back to being hunted, back to being on the run, back to all the shit they had left at the door.

"Fucking hell! What do you need?" Wade was on his feet in seconds and helping Peter up too.

Rocket grinned, "A prosthetic leg." 

Wade was on it in seconds and Rocket laughed to himself, and Groot was frowning and shaking his small head. "What? It's funny!" 

~

Fifteen minutes later and the trio were in a Kyln security craft and heading to Earth-616. "I'm gonna drop you off at the Avengers Tower, Nova says its safe now. So you can get outta my fur foreva!" 

They landed smoothly on the tower and both Peter and Wade jumped out and waved to Rocket and Groot who quickly departed. They were met by Natasha "Kick your Ass" Romanoff, Clint "Far-Sighted" Barton, and Aunt May! 

They all greeted Peter with worry in their eyes checking him to make sure he was okay. Aunt May brought him into the biggest longest hug ever. "Oh Peter dear. I was so worried." Peter hugged Aunt May hard, he had missed her so much. He was so thankful for Wade for thinking of her and making sure she was safe, but  _god_ had he missed her. Peter started crying, everything that had happened the past week coming to him all at once. The experiments, the jail, Wade. Everything. He felt tired and dizzy and soon enough he blacked out. 

Wade caught Peter in a heartbeat and picked him up bridal style careful to support his neck. "Can you just take us to our room now, Peter's just coming out of shock." Wade was worried out of his mind, but he had been through this before. He knew what it was like, he understood what Peter was going through and it hurt him, but he knew Peter could get through it. He knew it, because if he could do it so could Peter. 

Nat led Wade to their room and Jarvis opened the reinforced doors for the group. Aunt May was worriedly trailing behind Wade, happy that Peter was back, happy that Wade was so caring, but worried out of her mind. This was her son! Wade carefully layed Peter down on the mattress and started to take of his shoes. Wade was out of his mind, there was something definitely wrong with Peter, and it wasn't just the mental stress of what he'd been through. There was something more than that. 

"I'm so sorry Mrs. Parker, I know this is all my fault. I- I..." 

Aunt May walked over to Wade and placed a hand on his shoulder, "Wade you're the only reason he's still alive, don't ever let anyone tell you differently." The comment made Wade's heart clench and together the two carefully undressed Peter and put him into Stark Industries sweats. They let him rest, but Wade wouldn't leave his side so he stayed in the room brooding. 

"I'll bring you something to eat dear, what would you like?" 

"I'm not hungry. Thanks though," was Wade's reply to Aunt May.

She frowned, and planned on bringing him tacos anyway. But before she could leave Wade's voice cracked, "Did you notice his eyes?" Aunt May turned around a somber look on her face, "It's the first time I've seen him in so long, and he looks so different."

~

Peter woke up a few hours later staring at a white cieling and his heart rate spiked. He shot out of bed, only to be confronted with a distraught looking Deadpool. "Baby boy. Are you alright? What do you need? Where does it hurt? I'll-" 

Peter visibly relaxed and he fell into Wade's arms, "They're still after me." 

Wade sighed and pushed Peter gently back onto the bed, "Baby boy. We will get this fixed okay. We've survived this much, we can power through a few more chapter yeah?" 

Peter sighed and got up nimbly from the bed and headed toward the bathroom. He turned on the cool water and splashed it on his face. He desperately wanted to take a shower, he felt he was going to turn into oil if he didn't get some soap on himself pronto. Scrubbing himself dry with a soft fluffy towel Peter finally looked in the mirror and what he saw shook him to the core. He had become ubsurdly thin, his muscles had thinned out and he was so pale. Peter leaned toward the mirror more, he barely recognized himself, and then he saw his eyes and it took him a long time to figure out what was going on. His eyes that used to be purely brown were now speckled with silver. They weren't his eyes at all. That's when he knew. The experiments weren't behind him, there was nothing behind him. He was still at the base of the mountain, nowhere near the peak. He knew now that he was going to die either way. Either the experiments would kill him on a hospitable bed, or SHIELD would kill him on the streets. There was no running from this now. 

"Wade..." Peter's voice was weak, but it was enough for Wade to come bursting through the bathroom door.

"Wade. I'm going to die, no matter what I'm going to die. I'm dying," Peter's voice cracked and he looked at his shocked reflection in the mirror. Wade stepped closer to the spider and pulled him into a warm embrace, "No Peter, don't-" 

"Wade?" 

"Yeah baby boy?"

"...will you- will you marry me?" 

It took Wade a few seconds to process what Peter had just said. The merc went through a thousand different emotions: sad, overjoyed, overwhelmed. 

"Oh Peter, of course I'll marry you," tears started to roll down Wade's cheeks. He was stuck in between. If this had happened two months ago he would've been the happiest man alive, but now? Peter was dying, and he wanted to marry Wade because he thought these were his last moments. 

"I love you Wade, please marry me," Peter whispered as he placed a soft kiss on Wade's lips.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this chapter! Only one more. 28 is an epilogue ;) Thanks to everyone who comments!


	27. Love in Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Wedding!! Last chapter of the fic, enjoy :)

Peter woke up the next day to the soft sunlight shining through shades. Wade was sleeping soundly next to him, and the sight made Peter smile, he wouldn't ever get tired of waking up next to Wade. The spider carefully tried to slip out of bed without disturbing Wade, but as soon as he was on the edge of the bed Wade's rough hand grabbed his arm, "Petey?" Wade mumbled still have asleep. Peter smiled, "It's okay baby, I'm just going to get some breakfast, go back to sleep," he said and pecked a kiss on Wade's cheek. 

Peter strolled downstairs to Tony's workshop, he knew exactly what he needed to do. They had run extensive tests on him, and the collective minds of Bruce Banner, Tony Stark, and himself couldn't find a thing wrong. There was no trace of anything at all, in fact his charts read that he was healthier than before. WebMD of course had told Peter that he was probably already six feet under. Strolling into the lab savoring the feel of the cold floor on his bare feet, Peter rummaged through the piles of tools for what he needed. 

"Jarvis! I need some obsidian, gold, saphire, and ruby pleasee," Peter shouted out at nothing in particular.

"Good morning sir. I've placed the material in the cubicle across the room."

"Thankk you Jarvis."

Finding all the metal cutting and shaping tools, Peter walked over to the cubicle and got out the small five by three blocks of each material. He grinned at them,  _yes this will do nicely._ Taking the blocks to the machines Peter melted the gold and shaped it into a perfect circle just a little bigger than a ring that could fit his finger. Once the silver was hardened and shiny, Peter worked meticulously on the inside of the ring: plating it with the dark obsidian and running lines of sapphire and ruby in a criss cross pattern through it. Then stamping into the center of the inside their logos, half of it was Deadpool's face and the other was Spider-man's. Once it was done Peter smiled brightly, the ring was perfect. He hoped to whatever mystical force that Wade would like it, and that he would accept. Sure Wade had technically already said yes, but it wasn't a fair ask. It wasn't romantic or nice in any way, and Peter knew he could do better, Wade deserved better. 

Grabbing the ring now cooled and set Peter ran up to the kitchen, apparently it was seven in the morning and no one was around yet. Peter quickly pulled out the contents of the entire fridge, he grabbed the meat and threw it in the microwave and hit defrost, he wouldn't make that mistake again. Then he went to cutting up the vegetables. His dicing was no where near as nice as Wade's but it all ended up mushed inside your stomach anyway so who cares? Grabbing the defrosted meat and throwing it into the pan filled with maybe a little too much oil Peter got to cooking. Tossing the vegetables and lime juice like Wade would do, Peter thought it smelled pretty good. Once the filling was done, Peter put the pre-made soft tortillas into the pan just to make them a little crispier and he coated them with cheese. He then filled it all up so that it was overflowing with filling and right before he closed up the three tacos he'd made for Wade he threw the ring in. It was cheesy both metaphorically and literally and Peter thought Wade would appreciate the punny cliche. 

"Good morning Wade," Peter sing-songed as he strolled into the bedroom with the plate and a soda in hand. He opened the blinds on the window and Wade sat up in bed with a big toothy smile on his face, "You're in a good mood this morning."

Peter smiled back and he sat on the bed and offered Wade the plate. Wade grinned and kissed Peter lazily, "What's all this for?" 

It was just now that the nerves hit Peter. Suddenly he felt like running for the hills and never coming back.  _What if he said no?_   _Oh god._ Peter smiled nervously, "I- I thought you'd like it?" Wade knitted his hairless eyebrows together, "Baby boy, what's up?" 

"Oh, Wadee. It's just something nice can you just eat it. I promise it's better than last time." 

Wade shrugged it off and dug in. They were better than last time, "Baby boyy, these are great! You used the lime? I think I'm getting teary eyed." 

Peter could barely hear him though, he was all nerves. There were so many what if's. In fact Peter wasn't even sure if he was asking Wade because he was dying or because he wanted it. I mean he did want it eventually, but was it too early? Was there ever a good time for things like this? I mean it wasn't like he was proposing on the first date or anything, the past months had seemed like an eternity. And Peter was sure there wasn't a better man that existed anywhere in the universe. 

Wade had scarfed down the tacos, and he was on the last one and Peter had gone doe-eyed and everything seemed to happen in slow motion. Wade bit into the piece of the taco and he cringed at the hard contact. "Petey, I think you missed a chunk," Wade said and he stuck out his tongue with the hard piece on it. His eyes went wide as he took it in his hand, the ring was beautiful. It looked like any other regular wedding ring on the outside, but inside it was personal and beautiful and unique. Wade looked up at Peter, "You- You didn't. I mean... I thought?" 

Peter looked at Wade and his beautiful dark brown eyes and all the shades of scars on his patchwork skin. "Wade, the first time I met you, you told me I had a nice ass. And believe it or not I thought about it all day! And then you saved my life, even though we were just strangers. And then you helped me get through my toughest and worst moments, and this whole time you've been saving me, and I didn't even know I needed saving. I- You- you just make me so happy, you make me better. You saved me, and I realized that it wouldn't be a life without you. Without you, I'm dead. And maybe it's too soon, or too late. And maybe this is the crappiest most long-winded proposal ever. But it's my first time and I don't want to mess up, because I love you and I never want to be without you, and I would love nothing more than to be your husband. So, will you marry me?" 

The voice boxes had long since broken down, and Wade's heart was melting because the love of his life had really just proposed to him, and it wasn't because of anything else other than pure love. Every word Peter had said was ingrained in his head, if he forgot all else he knew he would remember this. 

"Aw baby boy, yes of course YES! I love you so much, HOw CouldD I ssay nO! AhhHH!," Wade was sure he was short-circuting and there were tears rolling down both their eyes because they were overflowing with joy and relief. Peter leaned in and kissed Wade, it was soft and slow. It was a memory and it was a promise. Peter took the ring from Wade and gently put it on his finger, "I love you Wade." 

And the forgotten tacos were on the floor and they were together holding each other both smiling like idiots. "I guess we can't jam out to single ladies anymore huh?" 

"Nope! Because I liked it and I put a ring on it."

"Hmm, well fiancee! Now you definitely can't get rid of me." 

"I can't think of half a reason why I'd want to."

~

Later that day, Wade had gone and made Peter a matching ring with the help of Tony and Jarvis of course and that night they had announced it to all their friends. 

Peter had gone to Aunt May and showed her the ring on his finger, and she had screamed in joy and given him the biggest hug of his life. "Oh dear, I guess I am really that old huh? I swear you were just a little boy a day ago. Oh Peter, the best of luck dear." 

Wade had called Blind Al, Weasel, Cable, and Bob. "Heyya Blind Al! How ya been old hag? I'm over here about to get married while you wilt away in that dusty old place!" 

"Wade! My my it's about time you slut!" 

-

"Weasel old pal! I'm getting married!!"

"Jeez Wade, again? How long is this one gonna last?"

"This ones foreva bub!"

"Do I get an invite?"

"Mhmm, be my best man will ya?"

"It's only the tenth time, I still have my suit." 

-

"Cable!"

"Congrats Wade, I saw it coming."

"OF fuCKIng COUrse!"

-

"MASTER WADE!"

"Bobby boy! I'm getting married."

"OH CONGRATULATIONS SIR!"

-

They were planning to have the wedding asap. Neither of them had any patience at all and it took Earth's Mighties Heroes to throw a wedding within a day. This wasn't LA after all. Tony had reorganized his lounge and bar so that it made more sense for a wedding, and Hawkeye had strung up the whole place with white chiffon flowing lazily from the cieling to the windows making it airy. They had ordered about a thousand orchids as per Wade's request and had strung them up all around the space. And they had made a beautiful arch for the ceremony which Black Widow had ruthlessly decorated with webs, Spider-man motifs, guns, bombs, Hello-Kitty, and Deadpooly things. 

~

"Come on baby boy! Can we pleasee invite Task Master?!" Wade pleaded with Peter.

"WADE WHAT THE FUCK! We're not inviting TASK MASTER! No VILLAINS!"

"THIS IS DISCRIMATION!"

~

Everything felt very hectic, if the world wasn't ending before it definitely was now. Everyone was running around like crazy, and Peter and Wade hadn't gotten a moment together since they'd made the big announcement. 

MJ had trapped Peter in the bedroom and had told Wade that he couldn't come in, something about tradition and bad luck. It was pure agony. "So we're gonna make you the coolest suit ever okay!" 

"Why can't I just wear a regular suit?!" 

~

Meanwhile Wade who had watched one too many Say Yes to the Dress episodes was in shambles over what to wear. There were so many options. So so many things he could wear! It was all very overwhelming, and he finally understood why weddings were planned months beforehand. 

He had gone to Xavier's school and held onto Wolverine's foot until he had agreed to come shopping with him. "Pretty please Wolvi! It's my special day dammit!" 

Logan who was absolutely a romantic couldn't resist by the end of Deadpool's spiel about how much he loved Peter and needed the wedding to be perfect. So they went to about every shop in the city until Wade finally found the one.

~

They weren't allowed to see each other than night, and they were barred from planning after ten o'clock. "You need your beauty rest, go on! We'll take of everything here. Go to bed!" Both of them felt like children being told their bedtime and they didn't complain too much. Peter was sleeping with MJ in another room, and he desperately wanted to see his husband to be.

 **WADE:** Whose idea was not letting to-be's see each other the night before?

 **PETER:** I DON'T KNOW! But after the wedding can we please time travel back and punch them in the face?

 **WADE:** Baby boy, that's the sexiest thing you've ever said to me.

 **PETER:** I'll give you sexier if you get your ass in here. 

 **WADE:**....on mY WAY!

But before Wade could smash through the door across the hall, MJ stepped in front of him. "Nuh, uh big guy! Save that for after the wedding." Wade groaned and pouted and almost threw a hissy fit if not for Mary Jane's scary "i will beat you with a wooden spoon" mom look. And so Wade was banished once more into his room, to spend a restless night overflowing with excitement. And so Peter had to spend what was probably the loneliest night ever replaying his vows in his head. 

~

The next morning MJ, Tony, and Black Widow were in Peter's room helping him get ready for the big day. He was wearing a finely tailored suit that had come straight out of Wade's bank account, and he looked like a model by some remarkable miracle. His hair was just the right amount of unruly to look sexy as fuck, and just damn. Men in tuxes, what could be sexier. 

Meanwhile Logan, Blind Al, Hawkeye, and Aunt May were fussing over Wade who looked absolutely gorgeous, even the boxes had to agree. They made sure that Peter was already at the alter before Wade even stepped out of the room. 

~

At the alter surrounded by all of his friends and Wade's Peter was absolutely giddy. He couldn't wait to see Wade, he was getting married! He was really getting married, it all seemed so surreal. 

Then suddenly the music started playing and Wade stepped into view with Blind Al at his side. Peter's jaw dropped and his eyes glossed over. Wade was beautiful. He was dressed in all white head to toe, his dress showing off his arms and chest. There was a glowing tiara on his head, holding a flowing veil around him. Wade's mottled skin stood out against the pure white lace and Peter was stunned. 

Walking up the aisle Wade didn't see any of his friends, he didn't notice Weasel's sly smile, or Dopinder's hilarious grin. He wasn't self-conscious about his skin or his face. He was happy, he was meeting his man on the alter and damn did Peter look good, his baby boy looked like pure sex. 

Strolling onto the alter in his Pnina Tornai No4524 from the Dimensions Collection and his bouquet of orchids a small tear slipped down his cheek. Aunt May brought their hands together, "Do you Peter Parker take this man, Wade Wilson to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, till death do you part? 

"I take you Wade, the love of my life forever and always. I will love you and cherish you with everything I have. I do." There was soft clapping from the small audience.

"Do you Wade Wilson take this man, Peter Parker to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?" 

"Peter, I love you more than tacos. I love you more than guns, and bombs, and Hello-Kitty. I would trade it all for just one more second with you, and now I get to call you my husband, and I can't think of anything more satisfying in the whole world. I love you and I do." There was quiet laughter and Rocket was ugly crying next to Groot, because it was all just too sweet. 

"Then by the power invested in me, the all powerful May Parker. I do pronounce you Husband and Husband!" 

Cheers erupted and Wade and Peter kissed and it all seemed to happen in slow motion, Wade closed his eyes and cherished this moment. It was him and Peter against the world now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The next moment he opened his eyes and he was alone at the alter, Peter was gone and his heart raced.

~

Peter opened his eyes and he was on the floor and a large cruel figure clad in black with a Spider emblem on his chest was on top of him. "Ssoo you think that you can just marry my Wade!" The voice a cold cruel whisper. It sent chills down Peter's spine. "They killed my Wade, they ripped him from me. And if I can't have him no one can!" Peter couldn't speak, he was frozen in fear. "I tried to make it easy for you! I tried to make you let him go, but neither of you could stay away! You should've listened to me when you had the chance." Peter looked stunned at the thing in front of him, "Who- what are you?" The thing grabbed his throat and pressed him into the floor, "I'm you." And suddenly he was staring at himself. "Any last words Peter?" And the thing lifted his hand and sliced through Peter's chest with it's claws.

~

Wade blinked and suddenly Peter was on the floor dead in front of him. Wade dropped to his knees and it all happened so fast. Peter's tux was torn open and on his torso was written, "Love" in red. 

  _The End_


	28. Epilogue

Wade's scream had been the saddest, most heart-wrenching, desperate sound to ever be heard. 

 

It had been a month and Peter still showed no signs of un-unaliving. 

 

The life support only did so much.

 

The merc with the mouth hadn't talked in weeks.

 

There was nothing to say.

 

Wade had gone to Peter's apartment, he hadn't been inside since the breakup. How long ago it seemed. He went to the drawer where he had found the present an eternity ago. He couldn't bear to stand in Peter's house, where his presence still lingered mocking Wade. 

He took the crisply wrapped square in his hand, "To: Wade" in Peter's scrawly writing on the front.

Wade opened it doing his best not to rip the paper, inside was a framed picture of them. It was Deadpool and Spider-man swinging in what had been their first date. Tears rolled down Wade's face and he collapsed on the floor and sobbed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry there's a part two coming soon.


End file.
